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Tuesday, April 02, 2013

April 2, 1941


Welcome to the second day of April! And, welcome to another edition of the Tuesday Timeline! This is the first of FIVE Tuesday Timelines this month, so I hope you're all ready for this trip back through time.

And, this time, I promise you that there won't be as many problems with this entry as I had with the April Fools Day entry. Though, I can't guarantee you that the entry will be completely devoid of gags and humour. You'll understand why I have made this disclaimer as you read ahead.

For now, why don't we wish the following famous people a very happy birthday! I extend birthday greetings to Gloria Henry, Linda Hunt, Reggie Smith, Emmylou Harris, Pamela Reed, Gregory Abbott, Amelia Marshall, Buddy Jewell, Christopher Meloni, Keren Woodward (Bananarama), Clark Gregg, Roselyn Sanchez, Adam Rodriguez, Aiden Turner, Lindy Booth, Jesse Carmichael (Maroon 5), Bethany Joy Lenz, Ashley Peldon, and Lee DeWyze.

And, here are some of the events that happened on April 2 throughout history.

1513 – Explorer Juan Ponce de Leon first sights land, which eventually becomes the state of Florida

1792 – The U.S. Mint is established following the passage of the Coinage Act

1800 – Ludwig van Beethoven leads the premiere of his First Symphony in Vienna

1863 – The early beginnings of the Richmond Bread Riots take place

1865 – Confederate President Jefferson Davis flees Richmond, Virginia as does most of his Cabinet at the tail end of the American Civil War

1902 – The Electric Theatre, the first full-time movie theatre to open up in the United States, opens in Los Angeles, California

1912 – Just thirteen days before it sinks, the RMS Titanic begins sea trials

1956 – Daytime soap operas “As The World Turns” and “The Edge of Night” both debut on CBS

1972 – After being labeled a communist during the Red Scare and spending years away from the United States on a self-imposed exile, Charlie Chaplin returns to the country for the first time since the accusation was issued

1975 – Construction is completed on the CN Tower in Toronto, Ontario, Canada, becoming the world's tallest free-standing structure

1989 – Mikhail Gorbachev and Fidel Castro meet in Havana, Cuba in an attempt to mend strained relations between Cuba and the Soviet Union

1992 – John Gotti is convicted of murder and racketeering in a New York City courtroom

1998 – Thirty-three year old Rob Pilatus of disgraced music group Milli Vanilli is found dead in a Frankfurt hotel room, due to a drug overdose

2005 – Pope John Paul II passes away at the age of 84

That's quite a lot of history, isn't it? Kind of makes you wonder what year we will be going back in time to, huh?



Well, the date on today's time machine dial is...April 2, 1941!

Yes, we're going back in time to 1941 to commemorate the birth of a man who has had an impact in the radio world. He turns seventy-two years old today, and shows absolutely no sign of slowing down!

I'll also be the first one to admit that this guy probably had more influence on me than I really should admit!

Those of you who only know me through the blog will probably not know this...but those of you who do know me on a more personal level know that I can be quite goofy. After spending a lot of time taking life more seriously that I really should, I've developed a bit of this wacky personality that involves taking popular songs and rewriting the lyrics of them to make them bizarre, grotesque, and even mildly offensive. It's particularly bad during the Christmas season, where I tend to do a feature known as “The Bastardization of Christmas Past”.

And, if it weren't for this man's popular radio program which introduced me to other artists who enjoy a good parody as much as I do, my twisted holiday songs might never have been penned.

(You see, people? Now you have someone to blame!!!)



On April 2, 1941, a man by the name of Barret Eugene Hansen was born in Minneapolis, Minnesota. But, fans of his might know him by his other stage name...DR. DEMENTO!

Now, Dr. Demento's love for music was instilled into him at a very early age. His father, after all, was an amateur pianist. Because he was always surrounded by music, he began collecting records at a very young age. Dr. Demento estimated that he started his collection just before he became a teenager, aided by a local thrift store that sold them at just a nickel a piece.

He began attending Portland, Oregon's Reed College in 1959, and while he was there, he worked at the school's radio station, KRRC, where he worked his way up to General Manager of the station two years into his studies. After graduating from the college in 1963 (following writing his senior thesis on Allen Berg's “Wozzeck”, and Claude Debussy's “Pelleas et Melisande”), he began attending UCLA, where he earned a Master's Degree in folklore and ethnomusicology.

Following his graduation from UCLA, he settled into a home in Topanga Canyon where he lived with the members of rock band Spirit, and during this time, he worked at local radio stations while working a second job as a talent scout for Specialty Records and Warner Brothers Records.

It wasn't until 1970 when the Dr. Demento name was born, at a little old station from Pasadena called KPPC. When Hansen debuted the persona, he also made a little bit of a tweak to his playlist when he started mixing novelty records with rock and oldies music. Thanks to the positive reaction that he received from listeners, he got rid of the oldies rock and made his program 100% novelty. The show proved so successful that at the end of 1971, he moved to Los Angeles to work for KMET, where he debuted a four-hour long live program in 1972. That program would end up lasting for eleven years!

Dr. Demento's good fortune increased in 1974 when his weekly radio program became syndicated nationwide in a two-hour format. Initially, the show was produced by his manager, Larry Gordon, and in 1978, Westwood One took over the syndicated show production. Westwood One would continue to carry the show until 1992, with On The Radio Broadcasting taking over for the next eight years when Westwood One handed the reins off. From 2000 onward, Dr. Demento handled the syndication of his program himself under the name “Talonian Productions”. This continued until June 2010, when the terrestrial radio format aired its final show. But, fear not, Demento fans. The show still continues in an online format, and you can listen to the shows on his official website, which you can visit by clicking HERE.

So, who ended up getting more notoriety by having their songs featured on Dr. Demento? Well, this guy for one.



Yes, believe it or not, back when Weird Al Yankovic still went under the name of Alfred Matthew Yankovic, he handed a demo tape off to Dr. Demento in 1976 when he came to Yankovic's high school to speak with the students. Dr. Demento not only listened to the tape, but played it as well. Listeners of the Dr. Demento program loved Yankovic's parodies, and their interest helped secure Weird Al a record deal in the 1980s. He still continues to perform and record music today, and Dr. Demento has since appeared in several Weird Al videos as well as in the 1989 Weird Al feature film, “UHF”.



Another group that made tongues wag when they appeared on the Dr. Demento program was Spinal Tap. In the late 1980s, Christopher Guest, Michael McKean, and Harry Shearer appeared on the program completely decked out in their Spinal Tap attire, and stayed in character for the near three hours they spent chatting with Dr. Demento on his program.

Certainly other celebrities got the star treatment when they appeared on the Dr. Demento show. It's hard to forget Mel Brooks' appearance on the program when he was presented with a present, courtesy of Canter's Deli...an absolutely huge cheesecake!



But perhaps no celebrity was more influential on the Dr. Demento program than the late Frank Zappa. I mean, when you consider that he named his kids Dweezil, Ahmet, Diva, and Moon Unit, Zappa and Dr. Demento seemingly gelled together much like Reese's Peanut Butter and milk chocolate! Of all the guests that Dr. Demento had on his program, he admitted that Frank Zappa was one that influenced him the most, and Zappa appeared on the Dr. Demento show several times as a guest. When Frank Zappa died in December 1993 at the age of 52, Dr. Demento dedicated the next scheduled radio show in memory of Zappa, and played Zappa's music throughout the entire program...the first time in the program's history that Dr. Demento devoted an entire episode to a single artist.



Dr. Demento was a definite influence on the radio industry, and he also happens to have influenced my silly side as well...well, much to the chagrin of those closest to me.

And, he was born 72 years ago today, on April 2, 1941.

Monday, April 01, 2013

April Fools Day


Hello, everyone, and welcome to The Pop Culture Addict's Guide To Life...



...um, wait a minute. This logo is upside down. WHO DID THIS?



Oh, well. I suppose that I should be used to it, considering that it happens to be the first of April. April Fools Day.

This day means that for many people, they'll have to stay two steps ahead, and think quickly to avoid being tricked by their friends and family members.

But, do you know how April Fools Day came to be?

Well, it all began on April 1, 707. A man by the name of Lewis F. Lirpa was born on this date, but many people just called him “Loo” for short. Anyway, Loo is a very key figure in the historical sense, as he was known to have played the very first April Fools Day joke. Now, keep in mind that back in the eighth century, pranks and gags were quite primitive, but somehow he managed to pull it off. He decided to alter a map back to town and gave it to his worst enemy to get back home following an excursion. The end result? Instead of heading back home, the poor soul stumbled over a cliff and fell into a bottomless pit to his death below. And, that was how Loo F. Lirpa ended up being the very first person in the world to play an April Fools Day joke, the day named after the date of his birth.

Actually, I'm only kidding. That's not what happened at all. Just another joke I've played. Though, if the Loo F. Lirpa thing didn't do it (it's April Fool backwards), the date of birth would have. Flipping 707 upside down gives you “LOL”.

No, the real story is that there really isn't a story about how April Fools Day originated. Nobody really knows exactly how it started, but there seems to be a link between April Fools Day and Geoffrey Chaucer's Canterbury Tales, which was released in the late fourteenth century. So, needless to say, April Fools Day has been around for quite some time.

I can honestly say that I've fallen victim to an April Fools Day joke once, when somebody set my alarm clock ahead an hour and a half, and I showed up for school ninety minutes early thinking that I was ninety minutes late. Still never found out who did that to me, but since this happened while I was in university, it really could have been anyone. But, that was a minor prank. Thanks to the wonders of photoshopping images and people downloading prank ideas onto their mobile phones, people can plot elaborate pranks on their friends. There are even television shows that focus on people playing gags and pranks on each other such as “Candid Camera”, or this clip from “Just for Laughs Gags” below.



Now, it's important to know that in all of these examples, nobody got seriously injured or hurt, and I want to absolutely make it clear that if you are to prank someone on April Fools Day, you do it responsibly, and never put anybody in harm's way.

But what happens when April Fools Day comes around, and all of the pranks and tricks that are pulled can lead to death? Well, that's just what a group of college students had to face when they decide to spend the weekend at an island mansion. It seemed like it was all fun and games at first, but when the body count began to rise, could it be that they were trapped inside the house with a serial killer?



That's the basic plot of the 1986 horror film, aptly titled “April Fools Day”.

It's funny though...whenever I ask people if they have heard of this movie, not a lot of people claim that they have. I can understand why...it is considered to be a cult classic. Released on March 27, 1986 on a budget of five million dollars, the film actually made almost thirteen million! It was based off of the novel of the same name by Jeff Rovin. The film was directed by Fred Walton.

There are eight main characters within the film. We have Arch (Thomas F. Wilson), Chaz (Clayton Rohner), Harvey (Jay Baker), Kit (Amy Steel), Muffy (Deborah Foreman), Nan (Leah Pinsent), Rob (Ken Olandt), and Skip (Griffin O'Neal). And, as the film opens, we quickly learn that the setting is the luxurious mansion owned by the family of Buffy, and that the time period is the weekend leading up to April Fools Day.



TRIVIA: In 1986, April Fools Day fell on a Tuesday. Though, I suppose we could just imagine that the film was set two years earlier. Yeah, let's do that.

Muffy is absolutely excited about the weekend, and so are the other houseguests. As they tour the mansion's grounds, Muffy is busy setting things up for the weekend, and she happens to come across an old jack-in-the-box that she seems to remember from years ago. And, keep an eye open for that box. It makes a reappearance at some point during the film.

The seven houseguests meanwhile make themselves at home after arriving on the island via the ferry. Of course, the ride on the ferry isn't exactly the smoothest ride possible. I found a clip of the movie to show you exactly what I mean.



Um...okay, who substituted the scene from Titanic for my April Fools Day clip? I tell you, someone is playing a prank on me today!

Sigh...anyway, I suppose I should tell you that one of the deckhands on the ferry is brutally injured in a freak accident aboard the ferry, setting the scene for what was to come.

Sure enough, the danger happens almost immediately as the guests settle in for the first night at the mansion. Now, because the film is set around April Fools Day, Muffy has scattered a whole bunch of pranks and gag props all over the mansion. From whoopie cushions and dribble glasses to fake drugs and an audio tape of a screeching baby, the guests try their best to make the best of things and have a relaxing night. But by the next morning, half of the houseguests disappear, some of them even meeting a very tragic end. And, by the time the surviving houseguests begin to figure everything out, someone has tampered with the phone service, and are forced to stay on the island until Monday!

And, what happens when the group discover that the killer could be one of them? How will they cope? Will they escape injury? Will the killer be unmasked? And, what is the deal with that jack-in-the-box anyway?

Well, you know what? For the first time ever in a Monday Matinee, I won't keep you in suspense. I'm actually going to show you the ending of the movie right now! I know, it's crazy right? But, the truth is that the ending is so shocking and so unbelievable that I can't resist. Here's how the movie ends.



Yep. That's right. Apparently, the two surviving characters are both female. Something happens to them during the movie that traumatizes them so terribly that they have forgotten how to speak English, and are now forced to communicate only in Spanish. Clearly one of them is the murderer, and she uses her patented scissor kick attack to choke the life out of the other one. But, she's not willing to die without a fight, so they are left to attack each other...

...no, wait. That scene is from a telenovela. AUGH! I've been pranked again!

Sigh. Well, now I'm really upset. Fool me once, shame on you, fool me twice, shame on me. I'm too distraught to even reveal the ending now. But, I will state this. There's actually two different endings that were shot for this film. One of them follows the plot line of the book almost perfectly. And, the other one deviates from the book completely. Which ending will you see? Well, I can't tell you.

No, seriously, in all honesty, I'm just going to get pranked again, so it's best to keep this under my hat.

˙ʎɔlɐɯɹou ɟo ǝǝɹƃǝp ǝɯos ǝʌɐɥ llıʍ ʍoɹɹoɯoʇ ʇɐɥʇ ƃuıdoɥ s,ǝɹǝɥ  ˙ǝɟıl oʇ ǝpınƃ s,ʇɔıppɐ ǝɹnʇlnɔ dod ǝɥʇ ʇɐ sn ɟo llɐ ɯoɹɟ ʎɐp slooɟ lıɹdɐ ʎddɐɥ



Ah, DAMN IT!!!

Sunday, March 31, 2013

I Want Candy


Hello, everybody!



I'd like to take the opportunity to wish everybody a Happy Easter Sunday! For today, I have dyed this blog entry in the finest Easter pastel colours! And, I'll tell you something...Easter has always been one of my favourite holidays. You want proof? Have a look at this picture!



In case you're wondering who the goofy looking kid with the bowl cut and velcro sneakers is sitting on the Easter Bunny's lap...well...it's me! Or, at least it WAS me back in the mid-1980s. I don't exactly know what year it was taken, but I would estimate it to be circa 1987. Unfortunately, I have a lot less hair than I did back then...but the good news is that I have since upgraded to lace-up sneakers!

Of course, going to the mall to visit the Easter Bunny was just one of the many traditions that I enjoyed as a kid. I probably have mentioned this before, but my family was never really the religious type, and we never attended Easter services. While all of us are very much aware of the religious background in regards to Easter, my family believed in setting our own holiday traditions at home. And, a lot of these traditions happened to involve a mainstay at almost every Easter celebration.

Easter candy.



Seriously, a lot of my fondest childhood memories involve Easter treats. First things first, I loved to eat the Easter candy! What kid didn't like to have a breakfast comprised of nothing but marshmallow Peeps, pastel coloured M&M's, and chocolate bunnies?

But eating it was only half the fun. Trying to find it was the real joy of Easter morning! When I was younger, whenever the Easter Bunny came, he would always leave behind a trail of candy enclosed in those little plastic eggs. It wouldn't be anything major...just jellybeans, jujubes, and maybe a couple of Hershey's Kisses. And, as a little kid, that trail seemed to go on forever. It would begin at my bedroom door, down a flight of stairs, down the first floor hallway, and into the den, where the real hunt for Easter candy began.

You see, when the Easter Bunny came for a visit, he always used to hide my Easter basket in some of the most unusual places, and it was my job to try and locate them with clues that were attached to small pieces of candy, like miniature chocolate bunnies, or a Reese peanut butter egg. And, the clues were quite cryptic, and some were really tricky to figure out. Here's a sample of what I mean...

  • I control everything that you watch (located in the remote control holder)
  • I'm hiding behind your sister and your brother-in-law (hidden behind their wedding photo on top of our VCR)
  • I'm the place where “Sunlight” and “Tides” can be found (hidden in the laundry hamper)
  • You can turn me on to shed some light on the subject (hidden behind a desk lamp)

You see what I mean? Those were tough clues to figure out for a kid! Yet, the final clue once I figured it out would lead to the smorgasbord of Easter treats. And, I congratulated myself on a job well done...despite the one year that I found my basket before I solved all the clues.



And, of course, all of us kids had our all-time favourites when it came down to what Easter candy we liked best. My eldest sister was a fan of white chocolate bunnies. My other sister enjoyed Laura Secord eggs. I myself absolutely have to have some form of Cadbury Mini Eggs. And, of course, all three of us were addicted to Reese Peanut Butter Eggs.

So, why am I talking so much about candy? Well, there's a couple of reasons why. First off, it's no secret that Easter candy makes up a huge part of Easter Sunday celebrations. It's estimated that in the United States of America, people spent almost $2.1 BILLION on Easter candy in 2012 alone! And, it's also estimated that Americans consume sixteen billion jellybeans on Easter Sunday alone! No wonder people are always in a good mood on Easter...they're all on a sugar high!

And, the second reason why I have decided to talk about candy is because today's featured song happens to have the word “Candy” in its title. We're going back in time thirty-one years for this one.



ARTIST: Bow Wow Wow
SONG: I Want Candy
ALBUM: The Last of the Mohicans
DATE RELEASED: May 1982
PEAK POSITION ON THE BILLBOARD CHARTS: #62

Not a lot of people may know this about this American one-hit-wonder by Bow Wow Wow, but this song is actually a cover version. The original hit was actually recorded just one year before lead singer, Annabella Lwin was born! Back in 1965, a group known as “The Strangeloves” released the original version, which if you like, you can listen to below!



TRIVIA: The Strangeloves had a fictional back story. Although the band originated in New York City, they claimed to hail from Australia. They claimed to be former sheep farmers who went by the names of Giles, Niles, and Miles Strange. In actuality, their real names were Bob Feldman, Richard Gottehrer, and Jerry Goldstein. Their record charted within the Top 10 in Canada, and peaked at #11 in America. Ironically enough, it never charted in Australia!

Seventeen years after the original charted, a British New Wave band decided to try their hand at success by recording their own version.



Interestingly enough, Bow Wow Wow was formed with an ulterior motive aside from making music. Malcolm McLaren was the man behind the band, and in 1980, he decided that one of the best ways to promote the fashions that up and coming designer Vivienne Westwood had created was to have the band wearing them while performing. The band's original line-up comprised of guitarist Matthew Ashman, bassist Leigh Gorman, and drummer David Barbarossa (of Adam and the Ants fame). As for the lead singer, it took some time for the band to find someone suitable.

Six months into the auditions, the band eventually settled on Annabella Lwin, a young girl that an acquaintance of McLaren's discovered at a dry cleaning place. She auditioned, and secured the position of lead singer in 1980.



Oh yeah...did I mention that at the time she was hired, Annabella Lwin was just thirteen years old? That's younger than the age that Debbie Gibson, Tiffany, and Britney Spears was when they had their first single released!

Needless to say, Annabella's age proved to be a factor in regards to some controversy regarding the band's album cover for “The Last of the Mohicans”, which contained the single “I Want Candy”. The album cover was taken in late 1981, and was a complete re-enactment of the famous painting “The Luncheon on the Grass”, by Manet.

Just for the record, here's the original painting below...



...and here's the 1981 album cover, which would be used for the band's 1982 album...



Now, what if I told you that Annabella was just fifteen years old when that photo was taken? Of course, the album cover doesn't exactly reveal any naughty bits (I'm sure if it did, it would have been double the scandal and double the trouble for the band), but Annabella's mother was concerned that the album cover was exploiting a minor, and even got Scotland Yard to launch an investigation into the matter.

Eventually, the investigation was dropped and McLaren had to promise not to promote Lwin as a “sex kitten” in order for the band to tour outside of the United Kingdom. If he didn't, Annabella Lwin would have been forced to quit the band.

At any rate, Lwin stayed on with the band long enough to record the song that got them noticed, “I Want Candy”. The video itself is quite...um...sub-standard compared to the videos that have been released since, but keep in mind that back in 1982, it was considered revolutionary and artistic. It certainly got a lot of airplay on MTV, which helped cement its place in the history of New Wave.

The song is now considered to be one of the most recognizable singles of the 1980s, and thirty-one years later, people still speak fondly of it. Recently, it was ranked at #86 on VH1's “Greatest Songs of the '80s”, and it landed at #8 on VH1's “Greatest One-Hit-Wonders of the 80s”. And, I'll be the first to admit that it is a great song!

So, what happened to the members of Bow Wow Wow since “I Want Candy” put everyone on a New Wave sugar rush?




Well, David Barbarossa would go on to be a part of another band, the British-based alternative group Republica, fronted by Saffron. If you're not sure of who they are, they released a couple of singles between 1996 and 1997 entitled “Ready to Go” (above) and “Drop Dead Gorgeous”. He had also been working on his first novel, “Mud Sharks”, which was eventually released in late 2012.



Annabella Lwin was kicked out of Bow Wow Wow in the fall of 1983, and embarked on a solo career, which spawned 1986's “Fever”. She reconnected with the former bass player of Bow Wow Wow in the mid-1990s, and re-created the Bow Wow Wow sound with rotating musicians filling in for the departed members. She also did some philanthropy work with her musical talents following the devastating tsunami in December 2004.



Sadly, there was no happy ending for Matthew Ashman. Following Annabella Lwin's departure from the band, Bow Wow Wow reinvented themselves as Chiefs of Relief, and Ashman became the band's frontman. That band would break up five years later in 1988, and Ashman stayed away from the music industry for a few years. He had been attempting to make a bit of comeback by joining the line-up of the group Agent Provocateur, but just before the band could release their album, Ashman died of complications from diabetes in 1995. He was just thirty-five years old.

And, that is our spotlight on the New Wave group, Bow Wow Wow. Not exactly the most relevant subject to talk about on an Easter Sunday...but then again, I've always loved weird traditions. Now, if you excuse me...I want candy. Ah...an Aero Peppermint Lamb. Delicious!

HAPPY EASTER!

Saturday, March 30, 2013

Uncoupled Heart - A Short Story


Okay, so today is Saturday, and normally around this time of the week, I would be talking about a television series that entertained millions of children all over the world.  And, going into this week’s entry, with Easter Sunday just around the corner, I had fully intended to do a Saturday Morning feature based on the traditions of Easter.

Unfortunately, I could only recall one Easter special that would fit for the spotlight this week – “It’s The Easter Beagle, Charlie Brown”.  And, unfortunately for me, I did a feature on this special last Easter.

As a result of the well being completely dry for ideas, I decided to try something else for the blog entry.  I warn you ahead of time, there are no references to Easter, nor are there any references to Saturday Morning cartoons this week.  So, for those of you readers who are looking forward to the discussion on animated and live-action children’s shows of yore, it will be postponed for a week.

So, if cartoons and Easter are off the table for this week, what am I going to be talking about this week?

Well, I’ll be the first to admit that the idea came to me yesterday afternoon. 

As you well know, yesterday afternoon was “Good Friday”, and it is a day in which many people sit back and observe religious ceremonies at churches all over the world.  And, for those of you who did attend church services yesterday, I hope that they went well. 

By my own admission though, I’m not really one with the organized religion aspect, so I spent my “Good Friday” strapping on my iPod, and taking a nice, 90-minute walk around town.  The weather was slightly overcast, but just the right temperature, and as I walked around town, I was actually inspired to write a short story. 



Now, it comes as no secret that I love to write.  I wouldn’t have kept a blog ongoing for almost two years if I didn’t.  But it has admittedly been quite a while since I really sat down and penned a short story.  I think the last time I did that was two years ago, and I’m almost a bit embarrassed to admit that the story was a fan fiction.

So, for today’s blog entry, I’m really putting myself out there, and I want to share my short story with all of you reading this.  There’s no pop culture.  There are no interesting trivia facts.  There’s not even a Tuesday Timeline or a music video to share with you.

It’s just me stringing together a few lines and paragraphs to create a short story.  So, with that, I post the story, and I hope that you enjoy it, and that those of you who want to comment on it give me honest feedback.

Oh, wait.  One more thing before I go on.  The story might seemingly contrast with the note that I wrote about the “Nucleus of Negativity”, but I figure that since it’s a short story, it won’t appear too hypocritical.  Well, at least, that’s MY defense on the matter.

UNCOUPLED HEART

The bitterly cold wind licked at the back of my neck as I strolled down the street.  The transition between seasons was very much apparent as the weather remained indecisive that March afternoon.  The flowers inside the shops were beginning to bloom, even as the last of the winter snow began to melt away.  Winter’s touch was weakening with each passing day, and her last gasps for breath were one final reminder of how cold she could be.

But that was fine with me.  The confusion of the weather seemed to fit the mood.

The confusion seemed to spread among the people walking down the street, as people could not decide whether to bulk up with heavy clothing, or don their finest spring fashions.  In some cases, they were dressed appropriately, but in others, not so much.  And, I could easily tell which ones were in discomfort simply by looking at their facial expressions, or how they wrapped their arms around themselves, trying to capture the little warmth that they were clinging to.  But that wasn’t difficult for me to do, as I always made a point to notice the little things many others missed.

Most people wouldn’t have noticed that the older one was, the more apt they would be to complain about Winter’s last hurrah, but I never claimed to be like most people.  Quite a few would probably have ignored the sight of so many people sipping on a hot chocolate or coffee as they strolled through the park, but perhaps they would have made that observation had they not had their noses buried in their mobile phones or portable gaming devices.  And who knew that there were so many people within the town limits that were dog lovers?  I attempted to keep count of all of the dogs that I encountered along the way, but I regret to say that I lost count after twenty-seven.

Or, was it twenty-nine?

I had also made one more observation as I continued my stroll through a park.  It seemed to me that almost every single person in town was walking in a group, or in pairs.  Whether they were teenagers who were breaking out their skateboards and bicycles, or a couple who appeared to have been enamored with each other for decades, it was nice to see so many people enjoying the afternoon with the people they loved, I thought to myself.

However, I was feeling as conflicted as the weather, as while I was happy to see so many happy, smiling faces, I was simultaneously feeling great sadness.

It was wonderful to see that spring was just around the corner, and that winter was taking a hiatus for now, and I was thrilled to see so many people taking advantage of the season.  But no matter how nice an early spring day felt, winter was still in the air, attempting to spoil what was supposed to be a day of beauty and renewal.  And, no matter how happy I was to see so many people in the streets enjoying the day with their loved ones, I was still feeling as though Jack Frost continued to have his grip on my heart.  For everyone else was spending the day with someone else, and here was I, alone and seemingly isolated from everybody else.

And, I was beginning to realize something right then and there.  It should have been a great day, and for many people it was.  But without someone to share the promise of a new day with, it just seemed as though something would always be missing.  I was feeling as though no matter how high the temperature rose, or how many rays of sunshine beamed across the sky, life would forever be incomplete because I was unable to share those natural wonders with someone who I wanted to spend the rest of my life with.

It felt strange to be the only person in what seemed like the entire planet without their other half.  In some weird, almost paranoid sense I felt as though all eyes were locked on me, almost as if I were some sort of sideshow freak that you might come across at a circus.  “Come see the eternally single man!”, I heard echoing in my ears while picturing that scenario.

But one thing I tried to keep telling myself is that my time would eventually come.  There would be one day in which I would be able to share the beauty of the world with someone who was able to appreciate it...and maybe one day, we would be able to appreciate the beauty that we would be able to show to each other.

Even the most dismal, rainy days do not stay that way for long.  At some point, the sun does pop out beneath the black cloud, and the world is bathed in the warm glow that the sunlight provides.  A new day filled with promise and meaning.

That’s what I hold onto as I walk down by the riverside.  I turn and look up at the sky filled with huge, puffy clouds that appear as if they could explode in a cloudburst of raindrops and fog, knowing that this is just one of many days in which we all feel a little bit down.  And, I realize that on a day like today, it only appears that my uncoupled heart is hurting more than it should. 

But, I keep telling myself...open your heart, and keep it open...and soon enough, the warm spring breeze will appear within. 

That’s what keeps me going.  That’s what keeps me walking through the city streets, watching the couples and singles passing on by.  Knowing that one day, my uncoupled heart will one day experience that warm, feeling.

The best feeling in the world.

Friday, March 29, 2013

American Idol


I’m sure that most of you who have read this space know that I am a shameless fan of reality television.  I enter a “Survivor” pool at work (which I won last Christmas), I have an addiction to “Big Brother”, and one of my goals in life is to try and appear as a contestant on “The Amazing Race”.  Of course, I’d have to relinquish my Canadian citizenship in order to make that a reality, and I’m not really sure I can make that commitment.

And, we won’t be discussing the fact that “The Amazing Race” is doing a Canadian edition, because the Canadian edition is set to take place within the Canadian borders.  I’ll be the first to defend Canada as being a country that has millions of things to see and experience, but when I compete on “The Amazing Race”, I’d like to see more of the world than Manitoba and Baffin Island.

So, yeah...I have some love to give for reality television.  If anything, some of the most obnoxious people who have ever appeared on reality shows make me look positively angelic by comparison!

But, there are some reality shows that I will not watch at all.  Some of them bore me to tears (Dancing With The Stars), some of them I find completely offensive (The Bachelor/Bachelorette), and some of them make a tsetse fly appear intelligent in comparison (Jersey Shore/16 And Pregnant).

I’m typically not a fan of reality talent competitions either.  I may tune in for a couple of episodes now and again, but I can’t say I ever invested my time in watching a complete season from beginning to end.  I don’t think that I’ve watched a single episode of “The X-Factor”.  I think that I’ve maybe seen one episode of “The Voice”.  I completely laughed off the lame 2003 “Star Search” remake with Arsenio Hall, but I can’t really say that I paid all that much attention to the original “Star Search” when Ed McMahon hosted it.  In regards to “So You Think You Can Dance”, I’d rather eat lead chips off of a wall.   And the only thing that I could tell you about “Canadian Idol” is that Carly Rae Jepsen appeared on the show as a contestant.

And, no...I did not just meet her, and that's not crazy.




But, what about "American Idol"?  Well, to be honest with you, while I have seen several episodes of the series, I can't really say that I cared enough about the show to watch an entire season all the way through.  However one cannot simply ignore the ratings juggernaut that the show was for the first few years that it was on the air.




When "American Idol" first debuted on June 11, 2002, few knew just how huge it would become. Between 2003 and 2011, it ranked near the top of the Nielsen ratings, with several episodes topping the list of most viewed shows for the days that the show aired.  With Ryan Seacrest as the host for the entire show's run, and a judging panel which originally comprised of Randy Jackson, Paula Abdul, and Simon Cowell, "American Idol" was a show that grouped people between the ages of sixteen and thirty all over the United States, and gave one of them the chance to be named the American Idol.

And, certainly within the show's history, they have certainly succeeded in changing the face of the music industry.  With the show currently in season twelve, it is estimated that "American Idol" has spawned at least 345 Billboard chart-toppers, and have made household names of several people.




It's just unfortunate that the show seems to be a glimmer of its former self.  Randy Jackson and Ryan Seacrest are the only fixtures of "American Idol" that have remained unchanged.  The show has employed several judges over the years following the departures of Paula Abdul and Simon Cowell.  Some of the past judges have included Kara DioGuardi, Ellen DeGeneres, Jennifer Lopez, and Steven Tyler.  The current judging panel comprises of Jackson, Keith Urban, Nicki Minaj, and Mariah Carey...and unfortunately, the on-set tension between Carey and Minaj, and Minaj's rather...um...colourful judging sessions, are taking away from what the show really should be about.

Finding new talent.

It's interesting to note that of the eleven Idol winners, only a few have really made a mark the music industry.  Many of the others who have had huge success after appearing on Idol have come in second place.  In one case, they didn't even make the Top 5!

And, rather than talk about the scandal, drama, and backstage fighting between the judges, I thought I'd use this blog entry to talk about the true winners of "American Idol", whether they won the competition or not!  

So, let's go back to where it all began...




KELLY CLARKSON - Winner of Season 1
Notable Hits:  "A Moment Like This", "Breakaway", "Since U Been Gone",  "Stronger (What Doesn't Kill You)"

Kelly Clarkson was just twenty when she won the title of "American Idol" during the show's inaugural season.  Who knew that after releasing the song "A Moment Like This" , she would go on to release five successful studio albums, have album sales of 23 million, and singles sales of 36 million?  Believe it or not, "A Moment Like This" became the best selling record of the year 2002, and broke the record for the biggest chart jump to the top of the Billboard Charts.  Even more interesting is that she ended up breaking her own record in 2009, when "My Life Would Suck Without You" went from #97 all the way to #1 in ONE WEEK!  That record is still holding today!  And, Kelly Clarkson has proven her versatility in both the pop charts and the country charts, when she reworked her song "Because of You" as a country duet with Reba McEntire.  Kelly Clarkson certainly did very well for herself, and now at the age of thirty-one, she is still continuing to make music.  In that sense, "American Idol" made her a star, and she was savvy enough to keep that career going.




CLAY AIKEN  - Runner-Up of Season 2
Notable Hits:  "Invisible", "Bridge Over Troubled Water", "Solitaire", "The Way"

An interesting fact about Clay Aiken.  He initially wanted to be a contestant on "The Amazing Race" before being convinced to audition for "American Idol".  It was a move that paid off, as Clay Aiken made it to the finals.  In fact, there was a little bit of controversy surrounding Clay coming in second overall, as many people believed that the voting (fans could vote for their favourite singers via phone, text message, or online) was rigged so that Clay would lose to eventual winner, Ruben Studdard.  

In the end, it didn't really matter, as Clay released his debut album "The Measure of a Man" later that year to huge success.  Although Clay has slowed down his music recording in recent years, he still does tours.  But these days, he's been raising his son, Parker, came out to the public, came in second place on "The Celebrity Apprentice", got into a minor scuffle with Kelly Ripa involving a hand-covering incident, and appeared in Spamalot!  Not a bad resume indeed...well...minus the Kelly Ripa thing.




JENNIFER HUDSON - Seventh Place Finisher of Season 3
Notable Hits:  "And I Am Telling You I'm Not Going", "Spotlight"

Jennifer Hudson didn't do quite so well during the competition, finishing near the middle of the pack.  But her career after the show took off in a way that nobody ever imagined.  She was cast in the 2006 film "Dreamgirls", which also starred Eddie Murphy and Beyonce Knowles, and to say that the film changed her life is an understatement.  To this day, she remains the only "American Idol" contestant to win an Oscar for Best Supporting Actress in a Motion Picture.  She also won a Golden Globe, a BAFTA Award, an NAACP Award, and a Screen Actors Guild Award!  Sure, it would have been nice to have won the title of "American Idol" as well, but hey, why should she complain?

Although Hudson suffered a devastating tragedy following the murders of her mother, brother, and nephew in 2008, she managed to find a way to work through the pain, and she remains a huge force in both the music and acting industries.  In between, she's signed on to become a spokesperson for Weight Watchers, having success with the program herself!  One could argue that Jennifer Hudson has become the most successful non-winner of all of the Idol alumni to date.




CARRIE UNDERWOOD - Winner of Season 4
Notable Hits:  "Jesus Take The Wheel", "So Small", "Before He Cheats", "Two Black Cadillacs"

But if Jennifer Hudson is the most successful non-winner, then some might call Carrie Underwood one of the most successful winners.  Since she won the competition in 2005, Underwood has been working almost non-stop.  She's won six Grammy Awards, sixteen Billboard Music Awards, seven American Music Awards, and ten Academy of Country Music Awards!  Where on earth does she find the space to store all of those awards?

With Underwood selling a combined total of 45 million records worldwide, she certainly has beaten Kelly Clarkson in terms of overall sales.  But, I don't think that Carrie should have anything to feel bad about.  After all, she has had twelve singles top the Country Music Charts!




KATHARINE MCPHEE - Runner-Up of Season 5
Notable Hits:  "Somewhere Over The Rainbow", "Over It", "Love Story"

Season 5 made history, as three of its alumni ended up fashioning huge careers following the season's conclusion.  First up is Katharine McPhee, whose rendition of "Somewhere Over The Rainbow" just missed the Top 10.  Her follow-up singles didn't perform much better...but she's certainly not a flash in the pan, as you can currently watch her on NBC's "Smash", playing the role of Karen Cartwright.




CHRIS DAUGHTRY - Fourth Place Finisher of Season 5
Notable Hits:  "It's Not Over", "Home"

It was a sad day for fans of Chris Daughtry, who was voted off of the competition just before the Top 3.  But, don't feel too bad for him.  Within weeks of his elimination, he was signed to a recording deal with RCA Records, and he formed a band named after his last name, "Daughtry".  The band released their debut album in 2006, and the album became the fastest selling rock debut in Nieslen Soundscan History, selling well over a million copies within a month and a half!  The band is still together and is recording new material for an upcoming album, set to drop later this year.




KELLIE PICKLER - Sixth Place Finisher of Season 5
Notable Hits:  "Red High Heels", "I Wonder", "Best Days of Your Life"

These days, you can catch Kellie Pickler on the current season of "Dancing With The Stars" (where I hear that she's doing very well).  Prior to that, she charmed Idol fans with her southern charm, and self-admitted ditziness to make it to sixth place in the same season that made Daughtry a star.  But, Kellie has had some success on the country charts, and she continues to record music today.  And, she also recently shaved off all her hair in support of a friend who was battling cancer last year...so, that was wonderful for her to do.





JORDIN SPARKS - Winner of Season 6
Notable Hits: "Tattoo", "No Air", "Battlefield"

Jordin Sparks was only seventeen years old when she won the competition, making her the youngest person to ever win "American Idol".  Now twenty-three, Sparks has certainly made an impact on the music industry.  Her debut single, "Tattoo" hit the Top 10 on the Billboard Charts, as did "No Air", a song that also featured Chris Brown.  She's sold 1.3 million albums worldwide, and she has also won several awards, including an American Music Award and a People's Choice Award.  She was named one of People Magazine's Most Beautiful At Any Age in 2012, and that same year, she acted alongside the late Whitney Houston in the 2012 film "Sparkle".




ADAM LAMBERT - Runner-Up of Season 8
Notable Hits:  "For Your Entertainment", "Whataya Want From Me", "If I Had You"

Adam Lambert was destined for stardom even though he lost out on winning the whole show.  He was signed by 19 Entertainment (the company that is tied to American Idol), and his first three singles did phenomenally well on the Billboard Charts.  He became the first American Idol contestant in history to headline a worldwide concert tour within the first year of appearing on American Idol, and his second album made history when he became the first openly gay artist to  have an album debut at number one on the Billboard 200 charts with 2012's "Trespassing"!




SCOTTY MCCREERY - Winner of Season 10
Notable Hits:  "I Love You This Big", "The Trouble With Girls"

The final Idol alumni that we'll be spotlighting is 19-year-old Scotty McCreery, who won the competition just two years ago, making him the youngest male winner of American Idol in history.  Though Scotty's career is just getting started, it is predicted that he will be doing very well as time passes.  His first two hits both made it into the Top 20, and a Christmas album that he released almost six months ago has been certified gold.  Time will tell if McCreery becomes a huge star, or just another Kimberley Locke, Diana DeGarmo, or David Archuleta...