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Sunday, October 27, 2013

Dancing With Tears In My Eyes

All right...so I admit that when I was coming up with possible topics for the month of October, I really wanted to come up with ideas that really made people scared out of their wits.  And one of the theme days in which I really wanted to do a spotlight on for this month was the Sunday Jukebox.  After all, there have been so many music videos that have been made that invoke fear in the hearts of innocent viewers all over the world.

Since MTV's debut in August 1981, there have been several examples of music videos that have a lot of imagery and concepts which have chilled the bones of many people over the last thirty-two years.  And as you have noticed over the last three weeks of this blog, I've chosen videos that have done exactly that.  

Well, at least they did so at the time anyway.  Nowadays they seem almost laughable.

In week number one of October, we took a look at the creepy erotic fantasy that Bonnie Tyler dreamed up when she sang about how once upon a time she was falling in love, but now she was only falling apart.  Nothing she could do, a total eclipse of the heart.

(And, we also talked about how the guy with the wonky beams of light illuminating his eyes gave me the creeps.)

Then in week number two, we took a look at Robbie Williams, and his video where he ripped off his clothes...and then his skin...and then all of his internal organs all in the name of art.  It's just a saving grace that the song itself was really catchy and had a great beat to it.  Otherwise, I probably wouldn't have been able to stomach even watching the video once.

And, just last week, the band known as Soundgarden showed us all what it was like to get sucked up into the endless abyss known as the inside of the "Black Hole Sun".  Now with more face morphing than ever before.

Now, as interesting, horrific, and grotesque as the three music videos up above were, you have to admit that the possibility of being greeted by a man shooting laser beams from his eyes singing "turn around bright eyes" is likely not going to happen any time this century.  You could never rip off parts of your skin and throw body parts to your adoring fans...because, well...you'd die a slow and painful death.  And, nobody ever wants that.

And, although scientists have claimed that the Earth will likely end up becoming permanently scorched when the sun eventually goes into its supernova phase, we don't need to worry about that happening for billions of years.  So, there's no chance of us having the black hole sun give us all permanent botox any time soon.

But today's video...today's video is scary for a number of different reasons.  Because of all the scary music videos that I have posted this month...this particular one was filmed at a time in which the entire world was on edge over the threat of a nuclear war.  It was the event known as the Cold War, for those of you who might not know.  And although the Cold War officially ended in 1991, the threat of nuclear destruction is still very much alive and still very much a threat to the world.




What makes today's video especially frightening was that this video was filmed just two years before a devastating worldwide event took place...and it certainly made everyone very uneasy.  After all, it was a video that depicted a possibility that nobody ever thought was possible...until it happened for real during one Spring day in the mid-1980s.

First, the video.





ARTIST:  Ultravox
SONG:  Dancing With Tears In My Eyes
ALBUM:  Lament
DATE RELEASED:  May 4, 1984
PEAK POSITION ON THE BILLBOARD CHARTS:  N/A

Yes, you're reading this correctly.  This song never actually charted in the United States.  I don't even know if the single was even released there or not.  However, I can tell you that in my native country of Canada, the single only peaked at #52.  In the UK (the place where Ultravox hailed from), the single performed much better, with the song reaching the bronze position on the charts.



Ultravox was just one of the many projects that Scottish singer Midge Ure (born James Ure on the tenth of October, 1953) was a part of.  In this case, he was the lead singer of the band, which was formed by himself and pal Billy Currie in 1979.  Together, along with Warren Cann and Chris Cross (not to be confused with the "Think of Laura" singer or the 1990's rap group), they enjoyed making music for seven years before breaking up in 1986.  However, the band reformed in 2009, and still perform the occasional gig.  Rumour has it that the band will be touring with Simple Minds beginning sometime next month!  And, you know something?  I actually think that would be an awesome show to go and see!



Anyway, in the spring of 1984, Ultravox released their seventh album, "Lament".  And the single "Dancing With Tears In My Eyes" was the second single from the album.  And to say that it was a rather melancholic song would be like making the shocking declaration that Coca-Cola has bubbles in it.

You see, the video actually starts off quite innocently enough.  In fact, I would say that like most people watching the video for the first time, I was a little bit confused over why the video began inside of a power plant when it first came on.  After all, I thought the song was all about dancing and people crying.  Like the same feelings that people would have when they break up with a girlfriend at the high school prom.  How naive was I back then?  

Little did I know that the action in the video would take a rather melancholic turn...one that likely scared many people to death.

Before you knew it (and before the poor guys who are working at the power place knew it), the screens started going haywire, and red emergency lights bathed the area in an intimidating scarlet hue.  

Did I forget to mention that the power plant was one that dealt with nuclear energy?  And that in this music video, the power plant was just minutes away from complete and total meltdown, effectively nuking those who are unlucky enough to live close to it?

Now, this isn't the first time that we have seen the threat of nuclear fallout air on television.  After all, the television miniseries "The Day After" aired just six months before this single was released.  But there was just something unsettling about seeing people panicking in the streets, knocking each other down, trying to make sense of everything that is going on outside.  The panic that those people must have felt knowing that something big was happening, and that it could very well be the last night they end up living through...it's unthinkable to even imagine how that would be.

Certainly Midge Ure (who acts in the video as the motorist who is trying so desperately to get back home to be with his wife and young child one last time) portrays this confusion and fear very well.  Even when he arrives home and gazes upon his wife for what ends up being the last time, all they can do is hold each other, never wanting to let each other go.  After checking on their child to make sure that all is okay (well, as okay as impending death by radiation poisoning can feel), both husband and wife strip off their clothes and make love one final time before descending into a deep sleep...a sleep that neither will ever wake up from.  With a flashing blue light and the shattering of window panes and television screens, the blast takes out all living things close by.  But eerily enough, the possessions of all of those who once lived in the area remain.  

And the video ends on an extremely sad note as we watch a home video of the family in happier times before the whole roll of film burns up and disintegrates right before our eyes.



A very scary thought, no?  Of course, nuclear power plants are likely not going to disappear any time soon.  They do run on less pollution and can power more homes and businesses than your average coal powered plant (though to be honest, I'm more a fan of hydro generated or solar power).  But they can also be very dangerous places if the wrong people make the worst possible kind of mistake inside.  The United States managed to avoid disaster in 1979 with Three Mile Island...but little did anyone realize what devastation that a nuclear meltdown would have on a community just seven years later.

The nuclear meltdown at the Chernobyl Nuclear Power Plant in April 1986 was a devastating event.  Large quantities of nuclear radiation were spread throughout parts of Europe and the then Soviet Union, and several communities (including the city of Pripyat which had almost fifty thousand people living there at the time of the meltdown).  It's unknown just how many people were negatively affected by the fallout of Chernobyl, but the one thing that I know for sure is that life for the people around the area would never be the same again.  And life as they knew it would be forever changed.

So, to end this blog off, a few images of Pripyat...the abandoned city...one that was affected by one of the worst possible events ever imaginable.  One that Ultravox seemingly foretold.




Saturday, October 26, 2013

Afterlife With Archie


BRAAAAAAAAAAAAINS!!!

Heh...only kidding.

So, how do you like my new zombie look above? Pretty scary looking huh?

Okay, so I'm not REALLY a zombie. I just got a little bit creative with YouTube.  

But have you ever heard of a show known as "The Walking Dead"?  I can vouch for everyone when I tell you that this particular show has been doing extremely well in the ratings. Currently in its fourth season, it's all that I ever see people commenting about in social media. And, I can definitely vouch that the program's DVD box sets have also been selling well. I think I've restocked seasons 1-3 in the electronics department at least two dozen times since I began working in that area. For whatever reason, zombies are in style again.

But, did zombies ever really go out of style? I mean, when you stop and think about it, zombies and their relatives have been invading film screens, television projects, and comic book pages for at least five decades...maybe even more than that. From the slow as molasses moving zombies in “Night of the Living Dead” to the insanely super speedy zombies in “World War Z”, zombies are going to remain a permanent fixture in pop culture horror for years to come.

Why zombies are so popular is anybody's guess. I'll admit that I find some of the more recent zombie projects to be interesting. And the brilliant thing about zombie movies is that they are not simply a display of rotting body parts and a voracious appetite for human brains. Many of them are clever and witty social commentaries. I think a lot of the reason why people are attracted to “The Walking Dead” is that in each episode of the series, they have a hard time trying to figure out who is more of a threat – the flesh-eating zombies, or the humans that are left behind – becoming increasingly paranoid with each passing day.

In the Resident Evil video game series (which later turned into a movie series), the main theme is corporate corruption and corporate greed...and how too much of it can literally cause an umbrella effect that can destroy entire communities. Just ask the people of Raccoon City.

(Oh, wait...you can't. They all died. My bad.)

Even a movie like “Dawn of the Dead” is socially relevant. After all, the images of zombies with dead expressions on their faces in the middle of a shopping mall is really no different than wandering inside of a shopping mall in the middle of Black Friday or Boxing Day. It's a rather biting (pardon the pun) commentary on commercialism and greed.

Even parody movies featuring zombies such as “Zombieland” or “Shaun of the Dead” have their own moments. After all, parody is commentary too!

So, I'm sure that you've already guessed that today's topic is going to be featuring zombies in some capacity. But I bet you don't know how I plan on doing this. And, I bet you probably are never going to expect that I'll be linking zombies with Archie comics.

Yes. You heard me correctly. Zombies and Archie Comics.

Believe me, I was very skeptical of the idea myself. I mean, being a longtime fan of Archie Comics since the late 1980s, the closest thing to a zombie story that I've ever read about Archie comics was in those “Life With Archie” comics where Archie characters are hypnotized into doing things that they didn't want to do. Or in a recent storyline from three years ago in which an evil being used mind control power to put the entire town in a state of mindlessness until Jughead discovered that Ms. Beazley's chicken soup would snap everyone out of their trances.

(Hey, it's Archie Comics. They're directed at a younger audience. Or, in my case, thirtysomething men who have one childhood obsession that they refuse to let go of.)

But to have Archie comic characters actually transforming into zombies and having them eat each other? Come on. It'd never happen, right?

Apparently I was wrong.



The first issue of the ongoing series “Afterlife With Archie” hit store shelves earlier in October 2013. And, would you believe that the first issue was sold completely out? I can attest to that one, as I couldn't find it anywhere. I had to resort to ordering it from an online comic book store to get my copy (which finally arrived a couple of days ago).

And, just as the title suggests, the serial combines the white bread world of Riverdale, U.S.A., and mixes it up with darkness, evil, and lots and lots of zombies.

This ain't your grandpappy's Archie comic.

Now, I suppose you're wondering...how the heck does a zombie apocalypse begin in Riverdale? There are several fingers of blame that could be pointed to several people in the community of Riverdale, but there is one person who I feel is the one that sets about the end of the world.



Reggie Mantle.

Through a series of flashbacks within the first issue of the story, we piece together how the zombie apocalypse began. Reggie tried to get his hooks into the unattainable Midge Klump once again, and Moose Mason caught him and decided to land a few “clumps” on Reggie himself...along with a thud, a punch, a couple of blams, and a giant kerblammo.

Onomatopoeia at its finest.

Now, if this were a typical Archie story, Reggie would crawl back home to heal his wounds, and then learning absolutely nothing from his experiences, goes right back to chasing after the unattainable Midge. That is, if it were a typical Archie tale.

But in Afterlife With Archie, this story is not like your typical Archie story. This time around, Reggie is absolutely distracted by Moose's latest attack. So distracted that he doesn't notice a fuzzy white creature approaching as his car speeds through a city street.



Yes. You read that right. Reggie runs over Jughead's beloved Hot Dog. And it doesn't look good. At some point, Jughead comes across a fatally wounded Hot Dog and actually picks his body up and jogs all the way to the home of Sabrina, the Teenage Witch.

(Apparently, Jughead discovered that Sabrina was a witch in a recent issue of his now defunct title. I think it's issue #200. But I'm getting off track here.)



Because Jughead knows that Sabrina is a witch, he urges Sabrina to bring Hot Dog back to life again. Even Sabrina's aunts, Hilda and Zelda try to help. But it's too late. Hot Dog is no more, and Jughead is left inconsolable. Jughead asks Hilda and Zelda if there is a magic spell that can bring dogs back from the dead, but both of them refuse, warning Jughead and Sabrina that the magic of necromancy must not be used with Zelda uttering a prophetic statement just before Jughead leaves.



Are you getting goosebumps yet?

Well, seeing the broken hearted look on Jughead's face causes Sabrina to completely disregard her aunts' warnings, and she and Jughead bring Hot Dog's dead body to a swamp near Carson's Creek to perform the ritual that will bring Hot Dog to life. Sounds like a bad idea, right?

Well, when Hilda and Zelda find out the truth, they lose their minds...and their human personas, apparently.



And with that Sabrina is banished to another realm for a whole year. Not good. Especially since elsewhere in Riverdale, a now zombified Hot Dog greets his master...and not in a happy way either.



Ouch...that had to hurt.

Meanwhile, while all this is going on, Reggie is feeling incredible guilt over killing Jughead's dog, and Archie is once again caught in the middle of a love triangle, deciding whether Betty or Veronica will be his date for the upcoming costume ball at Riverdale High. On top of that, Archie is extremely worried about Jughead, who skipped school. Amazingly enough, Archie doesn't seem to notice the gaping hole wrapped up in gauze that is now around Jughead's arm, nor does he seem too taken aback when Jughead freaks out whenever Archie mentioned Hot Dog's name. But Jughead and Archie seem to have one (what turns out to be final) moment where Jughead thanks Archie for being a friend, and urges him to have a good time at the dance without him.



But as the sun sets and the moon rises, the kids at the Halloween dance have no idea that this will be their final dance ever. Before the night is out, Zombie Jughead comes out to play...and unbeknownst to the kids in the gymnasium, Jughead has already claimed at least three victims.

The plague is in effect...and nobody in Riverdale is safe.

Now, issue number two doesn't go on sale until the end of November...but let's have a little bit of fun with this hypothetical question.

According to the comic book solicits, there are at least five issues that are in the works, with the possibility of several more if the series proves to be a success. And in those five issues, we see several people attempting to flee Riverdale to find refuge elsewhere. But the series also states that not everyone in Archie's group of pals and gals make it out alive. We've already seen that with poor Jughead.

So, let's ask the question. At the end of the Escape from Riverdale mark...who do you see making it to the end?

I'll come up with my list. Blue means they survive, Red means they become zombies, and Green means that I'm not sure yet..



ARCHIE: Well, since the title is called “Afterlife With Archie”, I would be mighty surprised if Archie was killed off at the end of the Escape from Riverdale arc. That could be why the title isn't called Afterlife With Cheryl Blossom or something like that. Actually, keeping Archie alive is a solid option. His grief over losing his best friend and seeing his hometown fall apart could make for a great story. And, when put under pressure, Archie can rise to the occasion in any situation. I say Archie makes it.



REGGIE: Reggie is one that I also predict will make the escape alive. Why? Reggie caused this mess. He killed Hot Dog, and that set the zombie attack in motion. Can you just picture Reggie's guilt over killing Hot Dog multiplied by a million when he realizes that he is responsible for killing off three-quarters of his town by just that one action? It would be interesting to see Reggie survive – WITHOUT HIS SECRET COMING OUT AT FIRST. I would imagine that once the survivors discover Reggie's role, they will hunt him down, but I don't see that happening until after the action shifts from Riverdale.



BETTY: Sadly, I see the curtains falling for our young blonde heroine. I think Betty will meet an early end, just because of the fact that she is the type of person who would want to help people in need. I can easily see Betty running over to Jughead to try and get him first aid, and Jughead biting her, and Betty becoming the next victim. I hope I'm wrong about this, but I can't help but think that Betty doesn't get out alive.



VERONICA: I think Veronica will outlive Betty just because of the fact that some of the spoilers indicate that the action moves over to Lodge Mansion at some point. Veronica's fate to me is probably the hardest to predict. There's a fifty per cent chance that the zombies will get her, but there's a fifty per cent chance that she could live to see a way out of Riverdale. Just because the story needs a female character, I'm tentatively putting her on the “survive” list, but I really am not sure.

ETHEL: She's Jughead's not-so-secret crush. She's a goner.

DILTON: Dilton thought that Zombie Jughead was a costume. This is disappointing, coming from a super genius as Dilton. But if brains are what zombies are looking for, he's history.

MOOSE: Moose is the brute force of the operation. It'll take a lot to get rid of him. I say he stays. But there's one possibility that could see him zombified...

MIDGE: If Midge is in a position where she is threatened by zombies, Moose will sacrifice himself to save her...leaving a path open for Reggie. Actually, you know what...let me change that.

REVISED MOOSE: He dies saving Midge, leaving a clear path for Reggie...though considering that there's a zombie attack in Riverdale, going on a date to Pop Tate's is out of the question.

CHUCK AND NANCY: We may as well group them together since they happen to be joined at the hip together. They'll either both survive or both die. Let's go with survive on this one. We need a somewhat big group to leave Riverdale to keep the story going.

KEVIN: We haven't seen Kevin Keller in Afterlife With Archie. He is a fairly new character to the fold. If he does appear in the storyline, his fate is just as questionable as Veronica's. Since Kevin and Veronica are BFF's, I see Kevin sticking very closely with Veronica. And, if one of them became a zombie, the other one would likely turn into one too. But since I have Veronica on the survive list, I'll put Kevin there.

So, my predictions are as such.

SURVIVES PAST RIVERDALE: Archie, Reggie, Midge, Chuck, Nancy
ZOMBIFIED: Jughead (confirmed), Betty, Dilton, Ethel. Moose
STILL HAVE NO IDEA: Veronica, Kevin

Time will only tell whether my predictions are true. And, will we ever see Sabrina again? I know I'm excited to see what happens.


(Oh, and for those of you who like Archie comics...the Afterlife With Archie story is non-canon. You can still read the funny, classic Archie stories you grew up with.)

Friday, October 25, 2013

The Facts Of Life - The Lost Girls

Okay, so I know we're getting closer to Halloween, and I know I promised that I would make sure that most of the pop culture topics were Halloween themed. But after the epic confession about me not being happy with the way things are right now in my life (and coming to the conclusion that I have to do something about it even though I am absolutely scared out of my mind at what could happen), I want to take the time to tell you that it was one of the most frightening things that I've ever typed in here.

Hmm...how about that? Maybe I AM making this a scary themed blog entry after all.

In all seriousness, I think it's hard for a lot of people to actually admit that they do need a change, and it's even harder to tell people about it. I can tell you that in my case, it was excruciating for me in a lot of ways for me to open up about how things in my life have not exactly gone according to plan. Sure, I tried to make things work for as long as I could, and I guess in some ways, I've become a true master of working with what I have. After all, it has been the philosophy that I have lived by since I grew up in what could be considered a blue-collar working class family – and not necessarily by choice either. Still, I adapted as best I could, and I respect the hell out of my family for instilling in me a sense of values that spent more emphasis on showing people respect, and less experience on the concepts of materialism and greed.

At least, that's what I got out of it.

But you know...there's a part of me that feels as though I have sort of disappointed those who had faith in me. And, I'd be lying if I told you that those feelings (whether they happen to be the truth or one giant fabrication) didn't influence the decision that I have made to plot my escape towards greener pastures at some point next year. But the more that I thought about it, the more I have come to experience the much harsher reality.

That I've been harder on myself than any bully, annoying neighbour, or misguided teacher could have ever been. And I guess I have it in my mind that if I go off to another city where I don't know anybody, and nobody knows me (although I've done such a good job hiding from social activities in my youth that I do sometimes feel like a stranger in my birthplace), it will allow me to let down my guard a bit. A change of scenery might help me learn how to live again, and enjoy myself, and to stop beating myself up.

I guess that's what's keeping me going ahead with this plan that I have. The fact that heading off in a new direction will somehow help me find my way back “home”. I know it sounds like a literal contradiction here, but those of you who look a little deeper will be able to figure out exactly what I mean.

So, in the spirit of moving on, getting out of your comfort zone, and finding new beginnings, I thought that instead of doing a horror themed television show, I would instead focus on a sitcom that focused on new beginnings, both on and off-screen. And, for those of you who are looking to be spooked...well, you might be disappointed...unless you find the fashions and the hairstyles of 1979 to be absolutely frightful. (I know I do.)

But, you know...if you really want a Halloween themed episode of this show, I do have an episode that aired in 1987. The episode title is “Seven Little Indians”, and you can watch it HERE if you like.



Of course, if you click on the link, then you've probably already guessed that today's topic is the NBC long-running sitcom “The Facts of Life”. And, here's a bit of trivia. Did you know that “The Facts of Life” is the longest running sitcom of the 1980s? It's true. It ran for nine seasons between August 1979 and May 1988.



And, I also see some of you scratching your heads in confusion, thinking that I am one of the biggest hypocrites in the world. After all, “The Facts of Life” basically had a group of girls being looked after by a guardian well into their mid-twenties. Even I had a hard time trying to understand how Lisa Whelchel's character of Blair Warner would want to stay living a a house dependent on her friendships with Jo, Tootie, and Natalie instead of using her gazillion dollar trust fund to set up house in Beverly Hills. And then for the final episode to have Blair buying Eastland...yeah...that pretty much goes against everything that I said about breaking free from your old connections and finding more of the world to explore.

(And, I'm not counting those two movies where the girls visit Paris and Australia either.)

But then again...who says that this blog entry is all about Blair, Tootie, Natalie, or Jo? I have news for you. It's not. And on that note, it's not about Edna or her edibles either.

And now I hear you all asking “well, if it's not about Blair, Tootie, Natalie, or Jo, then who's left?”

Well, I'll narrow it down. It's not about Andy. It's not about George Clooney who spent a season building and working at that tacky “Over Our Heads” gift shop. It's not about that Australian exchange student Pippa. It's not about Beverly Ann. And, remember that little street kid named Kelly who was played by voiceover actress Pamela Segall? Yep, me either. Needless to say, she's excluded too.

So, again, I bet you're asking...who's left?



Well, why not the girls from the first season of “The Facts of Life”?

You see, before the days of Beverly Ann, Andy...and even Jo for that matter, “The Facts of Life” was a very different show. It even had a slightly different theme song for that matter, with part of the lyrics sang by Miss Charlotte Rae herself! Take it away, Mrs. G!




Quite an interesting look back through time, isn't it? And you might have noticed a couple of differences about the show other than the theme song.

Firstly, you might have noticed that there are a lot more adults present in the show than in any of the other seasons of “The Facts of Life”. That's because in addition to Mrs. Garrett (who left Diff'rent Strokes to do the spin-off series), there was a teacher and a headmaster – both of which were gone by the beginning of season two.

And, you also might have noticed that there were seven students that were focused on instead of just four. Sure, Blair, Natalie, and Tootie were there and accounted for (the only three cast members to last the entire series run). But who were these other four students?

Well, why don't we talk about them a bit here?



Firstly, there was Nancy Olson, played by Felice Schachter. And, here's an interesting bit of trivia for you in regards to Schachter. She was the very first girl to be cast for the show, whose first appearance like so many of the other season one girls was on the season finale of Diff'rent Strokes' first season in which Kimberly Drummond considers going to the Eastland School for Girls. Nancy was one of Eastland's older students (I think she was meant to be in the same grade that Blair was), and she was also one of the only students on the series to have a steady boyfriend – the unseen Roger. Unfortunately, that was all that I really remember about Nancy, as I don't recall her getting too many storylines where she stood out as the main character.

Well, except for the one episode in which the students all took an IQ test and the results showed that SHE had the highest IQ in all of Eastland (you can click HERE for that episode if you like). And, Nancy found it difficult to live up to that IQ score as she was always more focused on her relationship with Roger than studying for exams. Well, that, plus the fact that another Eastland student was extremely jealous.



This brings us to our next Season One girl. Sue Ann Weaver, played by Julie Piekarski. And, I'm going to be honest...I'm actually sort of surprised that Sue Ann didn't stick around longer as it seemed that a lot of the first season episodes revolved around her and Blair! I can think of at least three episodes where she was featured as one of the main characters. The IQ episode that I talked about under the Nancy paragraph was one of them. After all, Sue Ann was widely regarded as the most brilliant student in all of Eastland. Knowing that Nancy had gotten a higher IQ than she did was a bit of a blow.

You know, come to think of it, Sue Ann wasn't exactly one of my favourite characters on the show because I always felt as though she had this superiority complex about herself. In some cases, I think her aura of superiority surpassed that of Blair's, and we all know how self-absorbed Blair could be at times! But, Sue Ann was involved in some rather heavy storylines on the series. Who could forget the “Dieting” episode, where Sue Ann starved herself to get thin and passed out at the kitchen table? And, I don't think ANYONE will forget the episode called “Dope”, which actually showed Sue Ann getting stoned, and actually educated everyone in the television audience about what a bong really was!

(HINT: You don't fill it with jellybeans or root beer. Not that I've ever used one – because I HAVEN'T – but I just know that you don't fill it with jellybeans or root beer.

Okay, let's just move on.



Ah, Cindy Webster, played by Julie Anne Haddock. The original tomboy of the bunch before motorcycle riding Jo came along in 1980. And would you believe that Cindy also ended up being one of the most controversial characters to appear on the series? I mean, yes, she was an athlete who competed in every sport Eastland had to offer, and yes, she preferred track suits and baseball jerseys to pink dresses and make-up. But that's not what was controversial. Just have a look at the show's pilot episode which aired on August 27, 1979.

Notice all of Blair's little jabs about Cindy? About how “strange” and “weird” Cindy was because she was always hugging and kissing her school friends (who just also happened to be female)? Yes, the show actually implied that Cindy was engaging in lesbian activities, and the show actually make out as if Blair was somewhat homophobic – which may or may not have been a stretch for Lisa Whelchel to portray depending on what stories you read about her. Of course, not everyone felt the same way, and Mrs. G was there to save the day and convince Cindy that her tomboy ways made her a natural beauty.



Finally, we have Molly Parker, a little girl who was presumably the same age as Tootie. She was played by some actress named Molly Ringwald. Maybe you've heard of her?

Anyway, like Nancy, Molly didn't really have much of a huge role in the series. Really, her only major storyline aired in the episode “Molly's Holiday”, in which she schemes to try and get her parents back together again. But if there's anything that I can say about Molly, it's that her comedic timing was absolutely brilliant. She really showed a lot of promise in her initial thirteen episodes. And Molly certainly was one who enjoyed celebrating moments like when she entered puberty (I wish I were kidding, but yes that episode really did exist).

So, all the girls were contracted to thirteen episodes, not knowing whether the show would be picked up for a second season. After all, the series began airing a good four weeks before the official fall schedule was broadcast on the major networks, and aired very sporadically throughout the 1979/1980 season. The ratings were not very good that first year, and it was considered a miracle that the show was greenlit for a second year.

But before the 1980/1981 season kicked off, there would have to be some changes. Nancy McKeon was brought in to the Eastland scene, which ended up being a good decision. But in order to save some money, the difficult decision was made to let go of half the cast and retool the show.

Gone were Julie Anne Haddock, Julie Piekarski, and Felice Schachter. Initially, Molly Ringwald was supposed to stay on with the show, but with Molly having been cast in a couple of movies, Ringwald decided to leave the show after filming the second episode of the second season.

But even though the girls were let go, they didn't quite leave the show completely. Molly Ringwald, as explained earlier, stayed on to complete an episode early in the show's second season. Both of the Julies were recurring characters until 1981, and Schachter was the last one to leave when her recurring role ended in 1982.



And then in the middle of season eight (the season in which Cloris Leachman joined the cast, and Blair, Jo, Natalie, and Tootie were running the gift store), Sue Ann, Nancy, and Cindy returned to the show once more to film the reunion episode entitled “The Little Chill”. And it was on that episode that we learn what happened to them since they graduated from Eastland.

Former tomboy Cindy had blossomed into a beautiful swan (albeit a swan decked out in leopard print), and was now America's Next Top Model of 1986! Many people watched as Natalie became the first of the main four to lose her virginity...but Nancy had already beaten her to the punch. Although Nancy and Roger were planning to get married, Nancy had already been knocked up! Oh the scandal!

And Sue Ann grated on everyone's nerves (especially Jo) when she bragged about being a high profile vice president of a company at the age of twenty-two – when in actuality she was nothing more than a glorified coffee runner. And how delicious it was when Jo discovered her secret! Don't worry, Jo kept Sue Ann's secret...but it certainly made Sue Ann choke down a little slice of humble pie.

And more importantly, it showed all of us audience members that in the case of Nancy, Cindy, Sue Ann, and Molly that there was life after Eastland. And for the actresses who played the various characters, there was life after Facts of Life.

Felice Schachter stopped acting and moved on behind the scenes, working as a production coordinator on such programs as “JAG” and “Law and Order”.

Julie Anne Haddock now goes by the name of Julie Anne Becker, and has also given up on acting, taking on a career in fundraising and becoming active in her church community.

Julie Piekarski-Probst has also seemingly given up acting, and is now married to a dentist and is the mother of three children.




And, Molly Ringwald...I wonder whatever happened to her? Let me figure this out while go through my movie collection. “Sixteen Candles”, “The Breakfast Club”, “Pretty In Pink”, “The Stand”, “The Secret Life of the American Teenager”...gosh, why can't I remember her?

Thursday, October 24, 2013

Leaving Brock Vegas



This has been a week in which I have done a lot of soul-searching, and a lot of thinking about life in general.  Whenever I have the opportunity to take some time off work, and I end up having some extra time to kill, I do a lot of daydreaming and a lot of thinking about things that I normally wouldn't think about.  I'm sure that most of you do exactly the same thing.  Though, I assure you that at no time when I have entered a state of deep thought have I ever done stretches and twists decked out in a pair of Lulu Grapefruit yoga pants.

What?  They're actually called Lululemon yoga pants?  And they're actually made for women?  Wow...my bad.  No wonder my butt wouldn't fit inside of them.

DISCLAIMER:  I have never worn a pair of yoga pants in my life.  I doubt I ever will either.

So, what kind of thoughts have I thought about in this blog entry?  Heavy ones.  Deep ones.  Thoughts that have actually kind of make me break down a couple of times thinking about them.

(Hey, I admit it.  I show emotion every once in a while.)

By the end of it, I've come up with but one solution...and it's one that I am scared to death of...but at the same time, I know that it may be the only shot I have of a better life for myself.  


October 24, 2013

I don't know about anybody else, but I find that having an absolute moment of clarity is just as rare for me as getting time off of my day job.  

And yet, as I type this out, something that only seems to happen every few years has happened.  I have had some time off work, and I have had my epiphany moment of the year!  And, I'm not going to lie...it's been very overwhelming for me.  

But, I suppose that I should probably explain myself before I go ahead and talk about the very moment in which everything finally became clear.

I'm at the tail-end of my vacation (the last one I'll be taking before the holiday rush) right now, but my vacation technically began the night of October 16.  And, one of the first things that I did was leave town...

...for a day.




I found myself in the middle of Kingston, Ontario.  Love that city.  It's got a great crowd, something exciting happening on every corner, and the people there (at least the ones that I dealt with on that day) were friendly, polite, and courteous.  I always leave Kingston on such a high because I have had nothing but positive experiences every time I go there.

And later that night, I was on Facebook chat with one of my friends, telling them about my day trip to Kingston, and how much fun I had.  I told my pal all the things I saw, everyone I met, the things I bought (which happened to be a couple of seasons of "Three's Company" in case you've been wondering), and I was still on a high.  

But then reality started to set in, and I typed in the comment to my friend that "I wish that I could just move to Kingston".

And my friend responded with "Why don't you?"

I thought about that for a minute.  And then minutes turned into hours, and hours turned into days, and it wasn't until a couple of days ago that I asked myself the very question that my friend asked me.

"Why don't I just move to Kingston?"




I mean, looking at the short-term future, it makes perfect sense.  I've talked about how one of the biggest regrets that I have ever had in life is not finishing post-secondary education back when I was living in Ottawa.  It's a regret that I've carried with me for eleven years now.  With both a university and college campus in Kingston, it will provide me with a second chance to get that degree - which will hopefully allow me to land a better career.  And although the entire country is in a recession and jobs are scarce, Kingston probably has more opportunities for job growth than where I am right now.  At the very least, I could probably get a transfer to a different store through the company, so that could inch me closer to the goal.




And, if I actually owned a car, gas prices in Kingston are actually cheaper than they are in my own hometown!  But then again, I could get a bus pass, as Kingston's mass transit system makes my town's look embarrassing by comparison!

So, what's stopping me exactly?  Why don't I get that work transfer now, pack up all my stuff, and start apartment hunting in Kingston?




Excuses.  I keep on making excuses to stay here.  And, don't get me wrong...I do have more of an open mind about the place of my birth.  It's a great community for someone to raise a young family, and it's a great community for someone to live out the last grains of sand inside of their hourglasses.  

But for a single male who is looking to improve himself on a professional, personal, and romantic level?  This is most definitely NOT the place for that.  I guess for a long time, I've tried to deny that this was the case, and I suppose that I kept grasping onto the ribbon that is attached to the balloon of optimism, desperately trying to cling onto it during the blustery winds of change.  

But the more and more I think of it, that balloon started to leak a long time ago, and now that I look at that balloon of optimism, it's almost as flat as a bicycle tire in the middle of January.

My hometown is affectionately known as "Brock Vegas".  Nobody knows how the name came about (at least I certainly don't).  Maybe it has to do with the fact that lottery tickets are a big seller here.  Maybe it's because of the fact that there's a major casino in the next town over.  Maybe it's because my town has a lot of people indulging in sins, and the nickname came from Las Vegas' nickname of "Sin City".  Who can say, really?

But I keep looking ahead at life, and I keep replaying this question in my mind.  In ten years, I'll be forty-two years old.  Will I be content doing exactly what I am doing right now at age thirty-two?  At 42, do I see myself being happy working a low-paying retail job?  Do I see myself being happy constantly questioning whether or not I can trust people?  Do I see myself being content with having friendships that are solely based on how many Candy Crush freebies I can offer them?  Will I be satisfied with not following my true passions?  Could I stand living in an apartment building filled with people that I absolutely have zero respect for the next decade?

The answer is absolutely not.  I guess the writing has been on the wall for some time.  Maybe it's because I've outgrown this community.  Maybe it's because I want to start all over again with a new group of people.  Maybe it's because Kingston has an Old Navy, and "Brock Vegas" does not that is pushing me.  Or, maybe it's because I know that I've grown as far as I can grow in my professional and personal life and that I cannot grow any further the longer I remain "home".




The answer is obvious.  And right now, all signs point to Kingston.

I realize that this decision is one that is huge.  I've agonized and even shed a few tears thinking about it.  But in the end, it's the only thing that I know seems right.  I need new scenery.  I need to finish school.  I need more of an opportunity to get myself out there so I can meet new people and finally develop the social life that I spent years hiding from.  What better place than the community of Kingston?  It's not that far away from home, it's got more opportunities for me, and although it will likely be a challenge to live in a city that is much larger than where I am right now...I have to keep telling myself that I'm at the age now where I can handle it.

The decision has been made.  And sometime in 2014, I'm aiming to make it a reality.  It's going to be scary as hell, and I will likely have many "what the hell did I do moments" followed by a freakout, followed by me watching Three's Company marathons while eating Triple Chocolate ice cream right out of the carton.

But I owe it to myself to make it happen.  I've wasted enough time feeling sorry for myself and making excuses as to why I don't deserve to live my life.  I have to do this while there's still a chance to succeed, or else I risk being very unhappy.

And, I've had enough unhappiness for several lifetimes.  At some point in the near future, I'm going to be leaving Brock Vegas.  The next step is making it happen.  And while I will miss family members and friends terribly, I hope they can find a way to understand that this will ultimately be better in the long run.  At least, that's what I keep telling myself anyway.  


So, I'm going to have to check out the Whig-Standard for apartments, and I'm going to have to find a way to register for school, and I need to get information on transferring between stores.  I've got a lot of homework to do.  But again...I've got to do this for me.  Not for anyone else.

I hate putting myself last.  And yet, that's all I've ever done.  My hope is that with the decision that I have made to relocate in the next little while, it'll help me get my priorities straight again.

After all...I owe it to myself to make me happy.  Nobody else will be able to do it for me.


At least, that's what I keep telling myself.

Wednesday, October 23, 2013

Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles - The Movie



Whatever Wednesdays have been a bit of a hit since I began the feature this past September 11, and I'm beginning to understand that by leaving the decision up to fate, it's challenged me to come up with topics at the drop of a hat.  And, I think that on the whole, it has made me a better writer.

Or, so I keep telling myself, that is.

Anyway, as most of you know, the Whatever Wednesday blog entry is such that the topic I choose is linked to whatever Clue character card I draw out of a bag.  Each Clue character is linked to one of the six theme days of the blog (minus the Tuesday Timeline), and whatever character I draw from the lot is the theme day that I will be choosing a topic from.  Makes sense, right?

So, let's see which Clue character's name comes up on top this week.



Ah, Colonel Mustard.  That lovable scamp.

(In all actuality, whenever I play Clue, Colonel Mustard is one of the characters that I NEVER play as.  But then again, yellow has never really been one of my favourite colours anyway - despite the fact that yellow happens to be one of the dominant colours in this blog's colour scheme...but I'm going off on a tangent and I'm just going to button my lips now.)

Okay, so Colonel Mustard.  This means that we're going to pretend that today is actually Monday.  But, don't groan too much all of you channeling Garfield right now.  Mondays mean movie discussions.

And you know what?  I'm thrilled that today's topic is a movie discussion because a blog entry that I did this past Monday gave me the inspiration to pick today's topic.

Forty-eight hours ago, I talked about the movie "Ernest Scared Stupid".  But I also talked a lot about my own movie outings.  I talked about how most of the films that I paid money to go and see in the movie theatre were worth the price of admission and then some.  I talked about some films which I used to like as a kid, but find that I like less and less as I get older.  And, I even came clean about the one and only movie that I have ever walked out of in my life.

And I still haven't forgiven Tom Green for that disaster.

But it's very rare that I like a movie so much that I have to go and see it again in the theatre.  And yet, I ended up seeing today's film twice when I was a kid.



That film was the 1990 release "Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles".  And, we'll talk a little bit about the plot of the film in just a second.

But before we go into that, I feel the need to talk a little about my Ninja Turtles obsession as a child.

Over two years ago, I did a blog entry on the cartoon series featuring the Ninja Turtles, so I may have touched upon my obsession a little bit in that piece.  But again, I wrote that piece two years ago and a lot of you who may be reading this didn't know that this blog existed back then, so for all of you - it's like brand new!



Anyway, I don't quite remember how my idolization of Raphael, Michaelangelo, Leonardo, and Donatello began, but I do know that by the time I entered third grade, I was absolutely hooked on them.  I watched the cartoon series every single day on a cable television channel called YTV, and also remember being excited when CBS began airing new episodes of the series in the early 1990s.  I used to read the comic book adaptations that Archie Comics used to release around that time, and still have all seven issues of the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles Classics Digests that were released beginning in 1993.  I had all the Ninja Turtles action figures (I still remember Leonardo being insanely difficult to find for whatever reason), as well as the Turtle Blimp and the Pizza Thrower toy.  And although I no longer have the toys, I still managed to save a set of Ninja Turtle fridge magnets that I received for Christmas one year.  I even had a Donatello wristwatch which I wore every day until the digital clock on the inside got cracked.



Now, if I stopped right there, you would probably agree with me that I had an obsession with the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles.  But wait, there's more.

When I was in the third grade, I would finish my schoolwork, and then spend the rest of the period ripping pages out of my notebook (well, without the teacher noticing, that is), and pulling out all of my Crayola markers and I would draw little Ninja Turtle comic books, which I would then place on the table in the classroom that had random books and magazines scattered all over them.  I even remember a few kids picking them up and reading them.  I don't know if they liked them or not, but at least I could make the claim that at the tender age of eight and a half, I was a "published author".

Hmmm...maybe in third grade I knew back then that I wanted to do writing as a career.  I knew I certainly wasn't going to get into any art institution as my Ninja Turtle drawings resembled green and brown blobs with multicoloured headbands.

Anyway, as if that wasn't enough, when the local shopping mall held a costume contest a few days before Halloween (I think it was either 1989 or 1990, I can't remember what year), my parents thought that it would be a good idea if I entered the contest.  And, I knew exactly what I wanted to dress up as.  My costume was especially impressive.  Having a mother and two older sisters worked to my advantage, as all three took turns and made my Halloween costumes.  And my eldest sister made me a really awesome looking turtle shell.  Some of the costume was bought at Woolco (we had to purchase the orange headband and armbands for my Michaelangelo costume), but the rest of it was homemade.  And I was so excited that I was on the shortlist for best costume in the mall.

But then the results were announced.  I lost to E.T.  A character from a movie that was released when I was a year old.  I was so upset.  And then to add insult to injury, my mom had to go inside of Woolco to pick up something from layaway and she dragged me inside of the store in full costume to show off my second prize winning costume.

Yeah...I'm still slightly not over it.   But, that's okay.  I don't even remember what the prize was in hindsight.  The costume got rave reviews when I went trick-or-treating.  That's all that mattered.



And of course, there's my obsession with the live-action movie.  A movie that I had to see in theatres twice.  I don't remember when the first time I saw the movie was (I know it was sometime after March 30, 1990, as that's when the film was released), but I went to a screening with a few people from karate school and loved every single minute of it.  I loved it so much that I wanted to have my ninth birthday party at the movie theatre so that I could invite five of my friends to watch the movie with me.  And surprisingly enough, my family agreed - and so did the movie theatre!

Surprisingly, the movie was still playing - given that my birthday was almost two months after the film debuted in theatres, it was a miracle that it was still screening.  As luck would have it, that weekend was the final weekend that it was being shown, so the timing ended up being absolutely perfect!

But then there was the fact that in 1990, my birthday fell on a Friday - a very popular day for people to go to the movies.  Fortunately, there were more people in line waiting to go and see "Pretty Woman" than there were to see the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie, so my party of eight (me, my five friends, and two chaperones) got in fairly easily.

Ah...the little minor details that flash through your head as you remember childhood memories.  I love it!

All in all, the party ended up being a huge success.  I got to see the film again with five friends, and all my gifts were Ninja Turtle themed.  It really was a great day.  And, as of this writing, I'm still in touch with at least one of the boys who attended my party.  I lost contact with three of the other boys, and the last boy on the guest list became an enemy in our junior high years and I have no desire to extend another olive branch to him any time soon.  But, I still look fondly on my ninth birthday as one of the best birthday parties that I have ever had.



But, that was back in 1990.  Do I still have the same love for the film some twenty-three years after it was released?  Of course.  Regardless of how dated the soundtrack is (click above for one of the songs on the film soundtrack - which I also owned), and regardless of the fact that a reboot of the franchise is slated to be released sometime next year, I still have a soft spot for the film.  And so did other film goers.  The Steve Barron directed film did make over $200 million at the box office, making it the most financially successful independent film ever, and the ninth most successful film of 1990.

Though, I have to admit that some of the casting choices were a little bit sketchy at first (even though in hindsight, the casting was absolutely perfect.  I mean, don't get me wrong.  Elias Koteas was a solid choice as Casey Jones.  But Judith Hoag's biggest credit prior to playing April O'Neil in the movie was a year and a half long stint on the soap opera "Loving".  (Ironically enough, when Hoag did not return for the two other films in the trilogy, she was replaced by another former soap star, Paige Turco.)



And just picture this for a moment.  The person who voiced Splinter in the movie was Kevin Clash.  The same Kevin Clash that voiced Elmo on Sesame Street for nearly three decades!  Yeah, just let that sink in for a second.



And then there are our four heroes in a half-shell.  And with one exception, two different people were credited with each turtle.  The first name is the voice actor and the second name is the actor inside the costume.

DONATELLO:  Corey Feldman/Leif Tilden
LEONARDO:  Brian Tochi/David Forman
MICHAELANGELO:  Robbie Rist/Michelan Sisti
RAPHAEL:  Josh Pais

TRIVIA:  Yes, the voice actor and costume actor for Raphael was the same person - which made sense given that Raphael had a larger role in the film than the other three turtles.  It's just too bad that the actor who played Raphael suffered from claustrophobia and had to take frequent breaks to keep his fear under control!

EVEN MORE TRIVIA:  None of the voice actors in the movie worked on the animated TV series.  Just in case you were wondering, the voice actors in the cartoon were Barry Gordon, Cam Clarke, Townsend Coleman, and Rob Paulsen.



Now, I don't want to go too much about the plot, as the main plot of the movie is more or less an origin story of how news reporter April O'Neil ended up crossing paths with the four mutated turtles.  As April reported from her newscast, criminal acts in New York City have skyrocketed, and the gang to blame is the group that call themselves "The Foot Clan" - a group of ninjas linked to The Shredder, a metal garbed evil man who has a rather personal connection to the mentor of the Ninja Turtles, but I think that I'll just leave that part out.  Again, I don't want to spoil the whole plot.

But all you need to know is that poor April O'Neil is attacked by members of the Foot Clan (who are later revealed to be street kids, juvenile delinquents and runaways recruited to continue the crime wave), and at first it looks like she could meet a terrible fate.

At least until four angels in green come to her aid, and chase the thugs away.  Unfortunately, April does not see who her saviours are, but she does happen to find one of their weapons - Raphael's sai.  And as April picks up the sai and carries it away, Raphael is upset at his own clumsiness, and makes it a mission to get the sai back from her at all costs.  So, when April is once again attacked by the Foot Clan and knocked unconscious from the battle, Raphael comes to her aid, and this time, he decides to bring her to him home underneath the streets of Manhattan so she can recover.  Of course, when April comes to, and she realizes that her rescuers are four giant turtles who eat pizza and an overgrown rat named Splinter, she naturally freaks out and screams bloody murder.  But once Splinter calms the reporter down and explains how they came to be, April begins to trust them.  But that's only the tip of the iceberg.

Over the course of the film, April ends up homeless and jobless, one of the Turtles is almost killed in a battle with the Foot Clan, Splinter is kidnapped, and the Ninja Turtles have to go to battle with The Shredder in an effort to dismantle the Foot Clan.  And over the course of the film, we find out the answers to the following questions.  Is the mysterious Casey Jones friend or foe?  Who is Daniel Pennington, and why is Splinter so eager to help him see that joining the Foot Clan would be the biggest mistake of his life?  And, why didn't April O'Neil think about getting fire insurance for her apartment?

Well, okay...maybe we don't find out the answer to that last question.



Whatever the case, that's my report on the Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles movie...a movie that only served to fuel my Ninja Turtles addiction even more.