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Friday, March 02, 2012

Behind The Music - Degrassi's Zit Remedy

Have you ever seen the show “Behind The Music”?

It’s a show that examines a singer or a band in great detail, from the highest of highs to the lowest of lows.  The show pieces together clips of past performances, music videos, interviews, and talk show appearances, and within an hour long program, we viewers get a better sense of what life was like for these musical artists.

In most cases, we see the artists or bands making it bit, having small setbacks along the way, and still are thriving in the music business.  There’s some who walked away from the music business entirely, but still managed to make a decent living doing something else.  On the flipside, some music stars get so caught up in the fame and excess that can come from the music business that they end up getting hurt or worse.

Today, I thought that I would take a page out of the ‘Behind The Music’ manual and come up with my own ‘Behind The Music’ style homage to a fictional television band.  This band delighted thousands of Canadian fans for a brief period in the late 1980s, and over the course of the next couple of decades managed to achieve worldwide success.

Which was an amazing feat considering that they only had the one song that never charted on any major hit lists.

I think we should meet this band, but before we do, let’s find out what show they appeared on first.


Degrassi Junior High debuted on January 18, 1987 on CBC, and ran until 1989.  Later in 1989, the show became Degrassi High, and ran until 1991, with a reunion movie airing a year later.  In 2001, the Degrassi series was reborn under the name “Degrassi: The Next Generation”, and it is a show that is still going strong, currently in its eleventh season.

And, as it so happens, the three characters that are being featured in this blog entry have appeared in every incarnation of the Degrassi series, and they were three characters who really came full circle.

This blog happens to be all about the fictional band, The Zit Remedy (later known as The Zits).


The Zit Remedy was formed in late 1987 by three students of Degrassi Junior High School’s Grade 8 class.  From left to right, you have Derek “Wheels” Wheeler (Neil Hope), Joey Jeremiah (Pat Mastroianni), and Archie “Snake” Simpson (Stefan Brogren). 

As Mastroianni and Brogren explained on the talk show ‘Jonovision’, at the time they filmed Degrassi, none of them knew how to play any instruments, but they were taught basic chords which lead to their one and only song creation, “Everybody Wants Something”.  You can watch a clip of this song below.


At any rate, the music storyline was just one of the many storylines that the three boys were a part of.  And, while most of the storylines for the Zit Remedy were triple acts, each boy had his own set of trials and tribulations, which added to the drama that Degrassi Junior High was known for.


When the Zit Remedy first started, as stated, Snake, Joey, and Wheels were in grade eight together.  Joey and Wheels had been friends since elementary school, and Snake befriended the two of them sometime in junior high.  Most of the show storylines during the first year of Degrassi Junior High involved the Zit Remedy practicing in the school gym, and getting into all sorts of mischief.  But, each member had their own individual plots.  Snake didn’t really have a whole lot to do that first year, except the Zit Remedy storyline.  Joey was the target of bullies, was used by Stephanie Kaye, and he also attempted to get together with goth girl, Liz, with terrible results.  As for Wheels, he learned that he was adopted, and after a talk with his friend Spike, he decided to try and get to know his birth father.

The first setback the band ended up facing though had to do with Joey.  Joey’s final marks in eighth grade were terrible, and Mr. Raditch, the teacher who taught eighth grade at Degrassi, recommended that Joey repeat the eighth grade.  With Snake and Wheels going off to high school, Joey would be left behind at Degrassi, and the Zit Remedy would be finished.  Joey was so distraught that he wasn’t even going to show up at the Grade 8 graduation dance where The Zit Remedy would be playing.

Fortunately, a twist caused The Zit Remedy to stay together.  Due to overcrowding in Toronto area high schools at the time, Degrassi Junior High added a ninth grade to its curriculum.  The students would have to take science classes at nearby Borden High, but for the rest of their Grade 9 year, they would be at Degrassi.

So, Snake, Joey, and Wheels were together again.  Although Joey was stuck in eighth grade again, he made the best of it, mainly due to his crush on 8th grade student Caitlin Ryan.  Snake also seemed to do well in 9th grade.  He began dating 8th grader Melanie Brodie, and he managed to do very well in school.  He did have to deal with the fact that his older brother had recently come out of the closet in between, but I think he handled it the best way he could.


It was Wheels though who would have the toughest time of it all that year.  The 1988/89 school year was supposed to have been a happy time for Wheels and The Zit Remedy.  They had such a positive reaction at the Degrassi graduation  dance with their song that they decided to record a tape of their music, selling their album to every student at Degrassi.  It was supposed to have been a good time for the band.

But then something happened that changed Wheels’ life forever.  Shortly after starting his grade nine year, Wheels’ parents were killed by a drunk driver.  Having to move in with his grandparents was bad enough, but when Wheels grew unhappy with living here, he hitchhiked across Ontario in search of his biological father, hoping that he could live with him instead.  The whole search was a futile effort though, as his birth father rejected him.  Eventually, Wheels was convinced by his grandmother to return back home, and with the support of Joey and Snake, Wheels ended up finishing ninth grade along with Snake.


Again, there was a worry of The Zit Remedy breaking up again due to Snake and Wheels leaving Degrassi Junior High and Joey behind...and again, fate stepped in (this time in the form of a faulty boiler which turned Degrassi Junior High into a barbecue pit) and The Zit Remedy remained a trio, as Snake, Joey, and Wheels all ended up as students at Degrassi High the following September.



So, the 1989/1990 school year was up and running, and all three were now at Degrassi High.  One change that occurred within the band was the decision to drop the word ‘Remedy’ from their name, simply calling themselves ‘The Zits’.  The band also made a video for their single “Everybody Wants Something”, with assistance from longtime friends Lucy Fernandez and Heather Farrell (one of the twins).  The first part of Snake and Wheels’ Grade 10 year (Grade 9 for Joey) was brilliant.

But then Joey and Caitlin broke up after Caitlin fell in love with Claude (That’s Claude that sounds like load and not Claude that sounds like clod), and Joey ended up being placed in a special education class after discovering that he has a learning disability.  And then Snake ends up developing a fear of exams, actually hyperventilating at the mere mention of the word exam.  And, of course, Wheels has another fight with his grandmother, and he moves out once again.


But unlike the situation of the year before where Snake and Joey were very understanding and patient with Wheels, this time, Joey and Snake were growing tired of Wheels’ pity parties and self-centeredness.  After money began disappearing from the Jeremiah household where Wheels was staying, Mrs. Jeremiah ordered Joey to evict Wheels, which damaged their friendship for a while.  Wheels attempted to stay with Snake, but Snake made him sleep on his front porch during a rain storm after getting frustrated by him as well. 

It seemed as though The Zits were on the verge of breaking up for good.  With Snake and Joey visibly upset with Wheels, and Wheels supposedly not giving a damn, it made it hard.

By the time the 1990/91 school year began, Snake and Joey’s friendship was firmly established, and Wheels was still on the outside.  The first half of the year, we barely see Wheels at all, as the action focuses mostly on Snake and Joey.  In Joey’s case, he learns that his bully, Dwayne, is HIV positive, and he manages to keep the secret the entire year, earning Dwayne’s trust and tentative friendship.  Snake, meanwhile, has to decide whether or not to date Spike Nelson or Michelle Accette.  In the end, he chooses Michelle...but don’t think that is the last we hear about Spike.


It isn’t until a tragedy occurs at Degrassi that the frosty relationship between Wheels and the remaining Zits starts to warm.  When Snake discovers Claude’s body after he commits suicide, Wheels visits Snake in an effort to cheer him up, while Joey is preoccupied with helping Caitlin cope with the shocking event.  Later on, Joey mends his friendship with Wheels when Wheels takes Snake’s spot in the Degrassi High Talent Show.  By the end of the series, structural problems with Degrassi High cause the school to be closed, and by the end of the 1990/91 school year, we think that the Degrassi story is over.


In January 1992, the Degrassi reunion movie “School’s Out” aired, and Snake, Joey, and Wheels are all key members in the plot.  Snake has apparently broken up with Michelle, and has been single and unhappy all summer long, working as a lifeguard at a kiddy pool.  Joey has gotten back with Caitlin again, but when Caitlin does extra credit classes allowing her to graduate high school in three years, Joey feels abandoned.  He tries to ask Caitlin to marry him, but when she refuses, he embarks on an affair with Tessa Campanelli.  Eventually, Caitlin finds out about the affair, and the two break up (after Caitlin shockingly drops an F-bomb!).  Wheels, on the other hand, has become a drunk (ironic given that’s how his parents were killed), and he ends up in big trouble at the end of the movie.  After drinking and driving, he gets into a car accident, seriously injuring Lucy Fernandez (who was in the car with him at the time), and killing a small boy.  Wheels ends up going to jail for the incident, and while Joey still manages to stay in touch with him, Snake is disgusted by Wheels refusing to take responsibility at first for the accident, and he refuses to see him again.  Snake and Joey’s friendship is seriously tested during the film (as Snake was the one who accidentally informed Caitlin of Joey’s affair with Tessa), but they manage to repair their friendship.

But Snake refused to speak to Wheels for almost twelve years.  It wasn’t until the third season of the revamped series “Degrassi: The Next Generation” that the Zits would reunite one final time.


The year was 2003, and Snake had found love with his former Degrassi classmate Christine Nelson (otherwise known as Spike), and they ended up getting married and having a son together.  At the time, Spike’s teenage daughter Emma was a student at Degrassi herself, where Snake worked as a media immersions teacher.  Joey was also involved in the new Degrassi show, where his stepson, Craig Manning, was a student at Degrassi along with Emma.  Joey was also in yet another relationship with Caitlin at the time, proving that both Joey and Caitlin were gluttons for punishment.

And Wheels?  Well, we’ll get to that.

Anyway, 2003 was a very bad year for Snake.  Snake had been feeling sick for some time shortly after he married Spike.  As it turned out, Snake had been diagnosed with leukemia and was forced to undergo chemotherapy, causing his hair to fall out.  As a result, Snake was feeling very depressed about things, and Joey suggested that they go bowling to get his mind off of things.


Unfortunately for Snake, Joey had invited Wheels to tag along as well, as Wheels had been released from jail a year and a half prior.  Joey tried his best to ease the tension between Snake and Wheels, but it wasn’t easy at first.  It wasn’t until Joey leaves them for a few minutes that Snake and Wheels really begin to talk, and begin to understand each other.  Wheels admitted to Snake that he had wanted to die after killing the child and hurting Lucy (even though Lucy eventually did make an almost full recovery).  After twelve years, Snake finally finds it in his heart to forgive Wheels, and by the end of the episode, The Zits embark on their comeback tour...which granted isn’t much more than the three men singing ‘Everybody Wants Something’ loudly as Joey drives them home.  But, it was a nice moment, and as explained earlier, it was really the moment where the band came full circle.

But the reason that The Zit Remedy worked so well was because of the chemistry that all three actors had.  Brogren, Hope, and Mastroianni seemed to work well off of each other, and you could tell that the three were just as good of friends off screen as they were on screen.

But as we all know, fate can work in funny ways, and in the case of one of these men, the ending was anything but happy once the cameras stopped rolling.


Stefan Brogren is the only original cast member from Degrassi Junior High who is still on Degrassi today.  Not only does he still play the role of Snake Simpson (who is now the principal of Degrassi), but he also does a lot of behind the scenes work on the program as well.


Pat Mastroianni has taken on a bit of a lower profile since he left Degrassi: The Next Generation in 2006, but he was recently seen in the direct-to-DVD film ‘Sharpay’s Fabulous Adventure’.  I imagine that to most people though, he’ll always be known as Joey Jeremiah.


Sadly, Neil Hope is no longer with us.  Reports are that he passed away in November 2007 at the age of 35.  Even more tragic is the fact that nobody even knew that he had died, not even his family or friends.  In fact, his death wasn’t officially made public in the media until February 2012!  That’s four and a half years!  I’m still shocked by this news, and am in disbelief.  But Neil Hope’s personal struggles were reportedly well documented, with him admitting that he grew up with family members who were alcoholics.  It appears as though Hope had his own demons, which for whatever reason was responsible for his tragic death.

But, although Wheels is no longer with us, his work will continue to live on through Degrassi.


Or, at the very least through a song that was performed by a trio of teeny-boppers.

Thursday, March 01, 2012

Parody - The Ultimate Stress Reliever

Would you believe that we’re at the beginning of March already?  I swear, 2012 is just flashing right by my eyes.

Or, maybe I’m just getting older.

At any rate, the first of March coincidentally happens to fall on a Thursday this year, which means that it is time to make another confession. 

This one’s not overly revealing though.  It’s light-hearted and funny, or at least I would like to think so, anyway.

I’m sure that most of us in any given day will have to deal with some level of stress.  Some of us can stare stress in the eyes and make it quiver in fear with our confidence.  On the flipside, some of us get so stressed out that we explode in an emotional tirade where our words may or may not be in English.

Fortunately, most of us have ways in which we can relieve any stress that we may have to cope with in a positive manner.  Some people might have a ball or some other object that they squeeze and crush and twist whenever they might feel stressed out.  Some people play a CD filled with soft music and ocean sounds while they channel their inner selves through a 45-minute yoga session.  And some of us are running towards the nearest vending machine, desperate to get our hands on every Reese’s Peanut Butter Cup that money can buy.

And, how do I relieve stress?  Well, the answer leads to this week’s Thursday Confession.


THURSDAY CONFESSION #9:  If ever I have a stressful day, I channel my inner Weird Al Yankovic and make a parody about my day.




No, seriously.  I find that if I can take out my frustrations towards a certain person or event, find a song that I really like (or unlike if the mood fits me), and change the lyrics around to put my bad day to the music of a popular song, I feel infinitely better about myself and the stress melts away like a Creamsicle on a hot August afternoon.

Although it wasn’t always the case, I can remember one of the first times that I did this.  I can even remember the exact date that it happened.


September 18, 2010 started off like any other day.  When I don’t do the blogging thing, I’m doing the “working a real job to earn a living” thing, and on that particular day, I was working a closing shift at my job during a very big sale that was going on.  One of the items on sale was Tropicana brand orange juice in the 2.63L jugs (and, yes, in Canada, we do use the metric system).  The only problem was that on that particular night, we were completely sold out of Tropicana brand orange juice.  It wasn’t a big deal, as I knew that we were getting another delivery of it that night (I was working a Saturday night shift and our deliveries usually come shortly after midnight on Sunday morning).  And, to their credit, most of the customers who were looking for Tropicana orange juice were good about it.

There was one notable exception though, and by the end of it all, the produce was flying and angry words were exchanged, and I was basically standing there in the middle of the dairy department still figuring out what the heck had happened.


Shortly after that incident, I was at home, listening to a playlist online.  It was one of those random playlists based on what your likes and tastes were in music.  Apparently, the computer must have thought that I was a Barry Manilow fan (I’m not really, though he does have some things I like), because his 1978 song ‘Copacabana’ started playing.

And ‘Copacabana’ got stuck in my head right alongside the crazy customer encounter. 

At some point, I think those two different events fused into a song parody.  And, once I started to work on it (I think it took a total of a half hour to write it), the stress that I might have felt during that night shift eased, and I began to focus my energy on creating a mighty funny parody based on that incident.

By the way, in case you’re interested to reading it, here it is in all its glory.  First, I may as well post a link to Barry Manilow’s Copacabana (the karaoke version, so you can sing along with the new lyrics).




And, now, here’s the song parody that was inspired by that day.  A little ditty I like to call No Tropicana.

I still remember, eighteen September
The clock was reading half past nine, I was feeling mighty fine
But then she came in, without a toothy grin
She was craving some OJ on that cool crisp Saturday
But then she saw her fate, she was a day too late
Her face grew red, and she was angry, there wasn’t any in the store
There was no Tropi-, no Tropicana
Sold the last one to a woman named Anna
There was no Tropi-, no Tropicana
Grovestand and Homestyle were gone after a while
No Tropicana, she was so mad
Her name I didn’t know, wished that she stayed home
For she was cursing up and down, her husband staring at the ground
Then shortly after, I went back to working
But then the night was filled with dread, as some gum zoomed past my head
That gum it really flew, knocked down the number two
Off the sign from the bunker I stood near, it was so surreal
There was no Tropi-, no Tropicana
So she attacked me with bananas
There was no Tropi-, no Tropicana
She threw everything out of the cart as she pouted
No Tropicana, she lost her mind!
(Instrumental bridge)
Her name I didn’t know, but she just had to go,
But that was only days ago, when she put on quite a show
But here’s the irony, as you will surely see
Because on the very next day, we had gotten more OJ
If she had waited then, she’d have some OJ then
She lost her cool and her composure, and she lost her mind
There was no Tropi-, no Tropicana
Unless she bought some in Havana
There was no Tropi-, no Tropicana
She left in a huff, and my night sure was rough
No Tropicana, please don’t come back
Please don’t come back!

You see?  When you take your frustrations and put them to the tune of a late 1970s standard by Barry Manilow, it makes everything better.  At the very least, I hope that it put a smile on your face. 


Oh, but don’t think this is the only example that I have of this.  Whenever the Christmas season rolls around, and you hear about a hundred and sixty seven renditions of ‘I Saw Mommy Kissing Santa Claus’, it tends to make one do some rather morbid parodies to counterattack the holiday favourites being forced down our eardrums.  One of my favourite Christmas carols has always been “What Child Is This”, but even that song can get a little annoying after hearing it played sixteen times a day on any given day during the month of December.


But, when you take that song and mix it with a standard Maury Povich paternity test extravaganza, you end up with something like this...

What child is this, they do not know
That’s why they’re on the Maury show
Our heroine’s tale is tragic and sad
Cos she can’t find her own baby’s dad
Pray, pray for our teenage mom
She got knocked up at her junior prom
Sadly the test showed he wasn’t the one
So there’s still no dad for her son.

Sigh...somehow bastardizing Christmas carols makes the holiday season seem much more fun...especially if you happen to work in retail.  But, of course, I wouldn’t sing these songs out on the sales floor.  Just inside my head where they belong...well, aside from the example that I posted in this blog.

But, I guess the point that I wanted to make with this confession is that at times, we all get stressed out.  Sometimes we get stressed out because of serious matters, and sometimes, you get stressed because you have to put your ducking skills to the test.  But, I find that if one has a healthy outlet to release some of that stress, then I say go for it.  Embrace it.  Become a better person as a result of it. 

So, to end this blog off, another song parody I wrote in response to those people who feel a need to deposit cold food in random areas of the store to rot, defrost, or melt (which may I add that each time someone does this, the prices of items continues to increase daily...so keep that in mind.)


Anyway, I put my thoughts and feelings about it to the tune of the 1994 song ‘Linger’ by The Cranberries, and here’s what resulted.




Wish that you, wish you could return it
So that ice cream wouldn’t melt, and that milk wouldn’t spoil
Instead you’ve chosen to be rude with your nonchalant attitude
That’s why the prices are so high, does it make you want to cry?
Because you left, you left a shopping cart out in the aisle to rot
While you were in the fashion changing rooms
Trying on Fruit of the Looms
Your juice was getting hotter, would it really be such a bother
To put back your cheese, you know you’re wasting food you fool
You make me go and wag my finger when you let your cold food linger
When you let your, when you let your, when you let your cold food linger
Oh it makes me want to scream when I’m forced to go retrieve
Lukewarm cream, lukewarm cream
If you, if you showed common sense, you’d probably save some cents
All you have to do is return things, if you don’t want to buy things
It’ll save me from going up to the front for cold pick-ups
So put back that cheese, or else you’re wasting food you fool
Don’t make me go and wag my finger, cos you let your cold food linger
Cos you let your, cos you let your, cos you let your cold food linger
I said put back that cheese, don’t make me catch you wasting food
Then I may have to wag my finger, cos you let your cold food linger
Cos you let your, cos you let your, cos you let your cold food linger

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Goofus and Gallant - A Balancing Act

In our entire lives, I would estimate that we make thousands of choices, if not millions.

And, for the most part, I’d like to believe that we are all capable of making mostly good choices.

But then there are times in which we knowingly make choices that are poor.  I’d even go one step further and say that most of us have made some decisions that could best be described as a total goof-up.

I know that I have had my share of really bad decisions in my lifetime.  I reckon that since I started up my Thursday Confessional section earlier this year, I’ve confessed to quite a few lapses in judgement.  But, the question is, can it really be considered a true goof-up if we learn from our mistakes?

I’d like to think so.

We’re all human.  We all make mistakes.  But whatever doesn’t kill us eventually makes us stronger and wiser.  Well, unless you’re one of those people who absolutely refuse to learn from past mistakes, in which case, maybe this blog entry isn’t for you.

Over the course of our lifetime, we’re more or less responsible for our own moral codes and belief system.  Mind you, everyone in the world has their own individual beliefs and moral codes, but I want to believe that most of us in our lifetimes have formulated a basic sense of what is right and what is wrong.

I’d like to think that for most of us, we learned the difference between right and wrong from our parents, siblings, or extended family.  But, some of us may have had a mentor growing up.  Some of us might have had a teacher who supported us and guided us to success.  And in some cases, we might resort to looking towards a higher power to help guide us in our decisions. 

I’ll readily admit that in my case, how I was brought up highly influenced the way that I make decisions in my day-to-day life. 

But, I also had additional influences to add on top of that.

I’m pretty sure that growing up in the 1980s (in which practically every sitcom was family friendly and presented a moral in each episode), I may have been slightly motivated to make choices based on the same ones that my favourite television characters made themselves.  I also credit the many teachers that I had over the years to show me the way (or in the case of teachers who were not as patient or understanding, show me the way NOT to).

But today’s blog subject is about a couple of magazine characters who also influenced my ability to make decisions that would improve my decision making skills and steer me on the road to happiness instead of plummeting down the steep slope of misery.


Have you ever read the magazine known as Highlights for Children?  I’m sure if any of us have been inside the waiting area of a dentist office, free clinic, or the emergency room of a hospital, you might have flipped through the inside pages while waiting to get a filling, or to get in to see a doctor.  Highlights for Children magazine has been around quite a long time.  The first issue was published way back in June 1946, and over the last sixty-five years has since surpassed one billion copies in print!

The magazine was founded by Garry Cleveland Myers and his wife Caroline Clark Myers in Honesdale, Pennsylvania.  Mr. Myers had a degree in psychology from Columbia University, and together with his wife, he would teach illiterate soldiers from the United States Army how to read.  These experiences lead to the pair pioneering the concept known as elementary education.  They also wrote several books together, and Mr. Myers had a column entitled “Parent Problems” that was nationally syndicated.

Having a strong desire to share their knowledge in education, Garry and Caroline began working for a magazine called “Children’s Activities”, which allowed both of them to discover and learn new things, while refining the information that they already knew.  Eventually, the couple would take that knowledge to start up their own publication.  Soon after Highlights for Children became available, the couple eventually bought the very magazine they used to work for and amalgamated it into Highlights for Children.

So now that you know the story behind the creation of Highlights for Children, what does this have to do with making good choices in life?

Well, in 1948, Garry Cleveland Myers created a cartoon strip featuring two little boys.  The artwork for the strip was originally done by Anni Matsick, and the strips always consisted of two panels.  One panel showed one little boy doing something that could be considered very naughty, such as forgetting to take a message from a telephone caller, or cheating on a test.  The other little boy on the right hand side would always do the right thing.  He would take detailed messages if anyone called his house should the person not be there, and he would NEVER cheat on a test.

Truth be told, whenever I would pick up a copy of Highlights for Children, I would always try to find this comic strip, just to see what mischief the troublemaking boy did, and what nice thing the nice boy did.


The comic strip was a feature known as Goofus & Gallant.  Goofus being the bad seed, and Gallant being the goody-two-shoes.


And, yes...I’ll admit it.  Goofus and Gallant were sort of like my kiddy conscience when I was growing up.  Doing things the Goofus way meant that I usually got punished by my parents, or had to stay inside for recess.  But, doing things the Gallant way meant that I got some perks and rewards, or even a simple “good job”.

I’ll admit that in my early childhood, I used to be a real Goofus of a kid.  I would do some of the craziest things humanly possible.  One time, I remember finding a pillow that belonged to my sister and coloured over it with Cadomark brand markers.  You know, the markers that had the funny smell and were one hundred per cent PERMANENT?  Yep.  Goofus moment.

Or, the time that I took all of the puzzles inside my kindergarten classroom, took them apart, and buried all the pieces in the indoor block pit?  Oh yes.  Goofus moment to the extreme.  I still remember the teacher forcing me to put all the puzzles back together.  It took me half of the afternoon to do!  But, I never ever did it again!


And, we won’t be discussing the Goofus moment that involved myself, a flooded sink, and my sister’s cosmetics vanity in the bathroom falling off of the wall, smashing her cosmetics all over the floor and making our bathroom smell like Exclamation perfume for two whole weeks afterwards.  Yeah, that’s a Goofus moment that I would really like to forget.

But, over time, my Goofus ways would eventually give way to the Gallant that I believe happens to be inside of all of us.  By eighth grade, I think that I was ‘Gallant’ enough to get through an entire day without experiencing one Goofus moment. 

I’d say that at the age of nearly 31 years old, I generally live life mostly like Gallant...though admittedly a few Goofus moments pop in there once in a while.  But, that’s perfectly fine with me, because I believe that to have the best possible chance in life, you have to keep your Goofus level in balance with your Gallant level.  I’m not saying that your Goofus and Gallant levels have to be fifty-fifty.  In my case, I think it’s more like seventy-thirty in favour of Gallant.  But trying to be all Goofus or all Gallant isn’t exactly the best way to go.


I think it’s pretty obvious why it’s not a great idea to attempt to become a perfect Goofus.  Goofus always makes poor decisions, is often self-centered, and is probably not the best role model for anybody.  I certainly can’t see adult Goofus lasting very long in any sort of job.  Heck, Goofus could very well be a high school dropout for all we know.  I doubt we’ll ever find out what Goofus would be like as an adult because Goofus has been eternally ten years old for over sixty years.  But, I doubt that he would ever be regarded as a pillar of the community.


However, the grass isn’t always greener on the other side either.  I don’t think I would be completely happy being one hundred per cent Gallant either.  Sure, he’s always good, and he’s always happy, and he’s always respectful.  But after a while, that can get pretty monotonous.  I think trying to be a Gallant in every aspect of your life can get pretty exhausting, and would inevitably cause more harm than good.


I guess if I had to put together an analogy using pop culture characters in terms of making a Goofus and Gallant comparison, we could take a look at the Simpsons.  As far as a Goofus character goes, Bart Simpson is probably the best example we can come up with.  Although there are some minor instances of Gallant in Bart, he usually doesn’t show it.  He frequently takes stupid dares, makes stupid prank calls, and cheats off of Martin Prince in order to not look as...well, stupid.  He also pulls pranks, he makes fun of the teachers (although some of them deserve it), and as far as respect for his parents and family goes, there’s not a whole lot...especially when it comes to Homer.


Meanwhile, I can’t help but picture Rod and Todd Flanders as perfect Gallant boys.  Those boys are respectful, they play nice games, and they always respect their families.  Too bad they’re also gullible, naive, and get offended and frightened by things way too easily.

When you see it illustrated like that, it’s easy to see why being all Goofus isn’t much better than being all Gallant, and vice versa.

But when you have a little bit of both in you, it’s not so bad.  Balancing is the key.

I mean, if I was in a situation where I was faced with someone who was being incredibly rude to me and would not let up, I’d examine both ways.  The Gallant in me would walk away and ignore them, because I know that they would eventually get bored and move on.  The Goofus in me would punch him in the nose.

I would say that in the above scenario, because I feel that I am more Gallant than Goofus, I would ignore the bully.  But, if the bully was acting like a real Goofus, and started to push me around...well, sometimes the only way to stop a Goofus is by being a Goofus.  Which, I guess if it works could end up being a Gallant moment.

Wow, I’m confusing myself here.  J


I guess the point I’m trying to make is that we all make decisions every day.  Some of those decisions require us to put our best face forward and give off the most gallant of impressions, while others can only be resolved through the Goofus method.  But, as long as we can control the balance between our Goofus side and our Gallant side, then I think we’ll all be all right.


I mean, if Goofus and Gallant can live on the same page of a magazine for sixty-four years, certainly they must have that balance, right?


BONUS QUESTION:  Are YOU a Goofus, or a Gallant?

Tuesday, February 28, 2012

February 28, 1942

Hello, everybody! It's time for another trip back in time with the Tuesday Timeline! It's February 28th, and three quarters of the time, it is normally the final day of February.

We just happen to be in one of those years that happen to have a February 29th in it!

But, as always, before we get into today's blog subject, we must first take a look back at some other happenings on this date.

So, to begin, let's take a look at some of the celebrities that are celebrating a birthday today. That list of celebrities include Charles Durning, Gavin McLeod, Don Francks, Stephanie Beacham, Bernadette Peters, Gilbert Gottfried, John Turturro, Cindy Wilson (B-52's), Rae Dawn Chong, Robert Sean Leonard, Patrick Monahan (Train), Rory Cochrane, Eric Lindros, Ali Larter, Jason Aldean, Karolina Kurkova, and Fefe Dobson!

That is quite a lot of people!

On the flip side, we also had to say goodbye to a few celebrities on February 28th. We said farewell to Mike Smith of the Dave Clark Five in 2008, legendary radio host Paul Harvey in 2009, and actress Jane Russell in 2011.

And, now for some significant events that happened on February 28th.

1827 – The Baltimore & Ohio Railroad is incorporated, making it the first American railroad to offer commercial transportation of both people and freight.

1844 – A gun explodes on the USS Princeton during a cruise of the Potomac, killing eight people. Of the victims, two were United States Cabinet members.

1854 – The Republican Party of the United States is formed.

1883 – The first vaudeville theater opens up in Boston, Massachusetts.

1885 – AT&T is incorporated in New York State as the subsidiary of American Bell Telephone.

1935 – Nylon is discovered by DuPont scientist Wallace Carothers.

1939 – In one of the biggest mistakes made in a publication, the nonsensical word 'dord' is discovered in Webster's New International Dictionary, Second Edition.

1940 – Basketball is televised for the first time.

1954 – The first colour televisions are offered for sale to the general public.

1958 – In what is often called the worst school bus accident in American history, twenty-six children and the school bus driver are killed after the bus hits a wrecker truck and plunged over an embankment in Kentucky.

1975 – A tube train crash occurs at Moorgate Station, London. Forty-three people are killed.

1986 – Swedish Prime Minister, Olof Palme is assassinated in Stockholm.

1991 – The Gulf War ends.

1993 – The Bureau of Alcohol, Tobacco and Firearms agents raid the Branch Davidian church in Waco, Texas, armed with a warrant to arrest leader David Koresh. This was the first day of a 51-day standoff, ending on April 19.

1997 – The North Hollywood shootout takes place, killing the perpetrators and injuring 19.

Now, that is a huge laundry list of events, isn't it? And, yet, none of these are the subject for today's blog.



Today we are going back in time seventy years. The date is February 28, 1942. And, as it turns out, there's a lot that happened on that date.



It was seventy years ago today that the USS Houston sank in the Battle of Sunda Strait. 693 crew members lost their lives in the disaster. A second boat, HMAS Perth lost an additional 375 men.



Seventy years ago today, Dutch admiral Karel Doorman, died at the age of 52 during the Battle of the Java Sea.



And, seventy years ago on this date, actor/director Frank Bonner is born. You might remember him best as Herb Tarlek on the sitcom WKRP In Cincinnati.

But for today's look back on February 28, 1942, I thought we would add a little bit of British rock flavour to today's entry. Because February 28, 1942 happens to be the date of birth for one of the founders of one of the most enduring bands that ever came out of the British Invasion. However, his rise to fame and his desire to stand out from the crowd eventually lead him down a bumpy road, and some would say that he paid the ultimate price for it.



Today's blog subject is the late Brian Jones, one of the founding members of The Rolling Stones.

Born Lewis Brian Hopkins Jones seventy years ago, Brian's early childhood was complicated by childhood asthma, which developed after a case of the croup, when Jones was four. He also had to deal with the loss of a sister, who died of leukemia when Brian was only three years old.

But despite these early hardships, Brian had always grown up around music. His mother was a piano teacher, and his father was the leader of the church choir.

When Jones was fifteen, he first heard the music of jazz musician Cannonball Adderley, which prompted an immediate interest in jazz music. He persuaded his parents to buy him a saxophone, and on February 28, 1959 (Brian's 17th birthday), his parents bought him his first acoustic guitar.

Although Jones had always done well in school (his IQ was listed as 135), he often got his grades without working for them, and found the idea of school to be too conformist and rigid for his liking. He had even gotten thrown out of a couple of schools for the hostility he had towards authority figures.

But a scandal in his late teens would have Brian quitting school for good, after he had gotten his fourteen year old girlfriend pregnant. Jones had encouraged her to have an abortion, but instead she carried the child to term, giving him up for adoption.

Throughout the next year, Jones did some travelling through Northern Europe and Scandanavia, but had to return home to England when his finances ran low. He ended up fathering three more children between 1960 and 1964 (he would end up fathering six children total, none of which were raised by him). He tried to get into an art school in 1961, but his application was denied after someone wrote the school outing him as a 'drifter'.

Shortly after that, Jones moved to London, where he befriended several up and coming musicians including Paul Jones from Manfred Mann, Alexis Korner, and future Cream bassist Jack Bruce. Briefly adopting the stage name of Elmo Lewis, Jones became a blues musician, and in May 1962, Jones had placed an ad in Jazz News inviting all musicians interested in forming an R&B group to meet at the Bricklayer's Arms pub. Pianist Ian “Stu” Stewart was the first to respond to the ad. Singer Mick Jagger also responded, and he brought his childhood friend Keith Richards to rehearsals. Richards joined the band shortly afterwards.



According to Keith Richards, it was Jones who had the idea to name themselves “The Rolling Stones”, although in early performances, the 'G' in 'Rolling' was left off. The name originated from a song featured on 'The Best Of Muddy Waters' album.



The foursome of Jones, Jagger, Richards, and Stewart were later joined by drummer Tony Chapman and bass player Dick Taylor, and The Rolling Stones played their very first gig on July 12, 1962.

For about a year, Jagger, Richards, and Jones shared a flat together with future photographer James Phelge, and Jones and Richards would often listen to blues records and play the guitar. Jones reportedly even taught Jagger how to play the harmonica.

Over the next few months, the band eventually found a permanent bassist in the form of Bill Wyman, and a permanent drummer by the name of Charlie Watts.

The group played dozens of gigs at various jazz and blues clubs, garnering the adoration of fans. However, the band was also highly criticized by traditional jazz musicians, who were threatened by their increasing popularity. In the band's earliest days, Jagger was the lead singer, but many felt that Brian Jones was the real leader behind the band. He was the one promoting the band, booking the gigs, and some people even admitted that Jones, with his mod look and huge stage presence was actually a much livelier performer than Mick Jagger!



(Hmmm...I wonder if Maroon 5's song would have worked had it been titled 'Moves Like Jones'?)

But Jones was very instrumental in the band's earliest singles. Quite literally, actually. Jones was most widely known for playing a Harmony Stratotone, and a Gretsch Double Anniversary for a main guitar, but he was also known for playing a variety of other musical instruments as well. He would play slide guitar, sitar, organ, piano, marimba, trumpet, harpsichord, accordion, saxophone, oboe, harmonica, autoharp, and recorder!

In fact, take a listen to this single back in the days when Jones was a member of the band. If you listen closely to the recorder in this #1 hit, that is courtesy of Brian Jones.



ARTIST: The Rolling Stones
SONG: Ruby Tuesday
ALBUM: Between The Buttons
DATE RELEASED: January 13, 1967
PEAK POSITION ON THE BILLBOARD CHARTS: #1 for 1 week



Wasn't that beautiful? I'll admit that the only reason that I wanted to include this song was because it happens to be one of my all-time favourite singles from The Rolling Stones, but it also demonstrated just a smidgen of the talent that Jones brought to the band.

But somewhere along the way, Jones began to break away from the band unity and started alienating his bandmates due to some rather poor choices.

The friction started to happen back in the days when Jones acted as the band's business manager. Because of this, Jones would get a higher wage than the rest of the band members. This was the beginning of the resentment between Jones and the rest of the band. But it wasn't until the arrival of Andrew Loog Oldham, who became the manager and producer of the band that Jones really started to drift away from The Rolling Stones.



Oldham came into the band in late 1963, and he was a firm believer in having members of bands write their own songs, because he felt it was financially advantageous. He didn't think that the band's current playlist of blues and jazz standard cover songs would not keep the band fresh. He insisted that the band start writing and composing their own songs, and he specifically wanted to exploit the charisma and stage performance of Jagger as a main focus of the band. As a result, the band steered away from the covers that Jones preferred to play, and started focusing more on original songs written by Mick Jagger and Keith Richards.

All of these changes took a major toll on Brian Jones. Being physically drained from all the touring, the inability to handle the money and fame, and the feelings of depression caused by his contributions to The Rolling Stones being diminished lead to Jones overindulging in drugs and alcohol.

Nothing was off limits for Jones. He drank heavily, and often used such drugs as cannabis and LSD. The drug and alcohol abuse took its toll on Jones, with his physical health deteriorating. Many accounts also state that Jones' mental health was fragile, as he was often prone to frequent angry outbursts and became quite anti-social. Shortly after “Ruby Tuesday” topped the charts, he was arrested for drug possession in May 1967. But after protesters demanded that Jones be freed, Jones was fined, given probation, and ordered to seek counselling.

But by then, the relationship between Jones and his bandmates was at an all-time low. According to the band, Brian often had two personalities. One was a gentle and kind Brian who would give anyone the shirt off of his back. The other one was a hostile, selfish Brian, who was reportedly cruel and vicious. And, part of the band's frustrations came from the simple fact that they didn't know which Brian they would deal with on any given day.

(Though it probably didn't help matters much when one of Jones' girlfriends ended up leaving him for Keith Richards, which only served to add to the animosity between Richards and Jones specifically.)

A second arrest for drug possession occurred just one year after his first, and his legal troubles, combined with the estrangement from his bandmates and his increasing dependency on drugs were all factors that eventually lead to Jones leaving the band in 1969.

To the general public, it appeared as though Jones had left the band by his own accord, but the real story was that he was visited by Jagger, Richards, and Watts on June 8, 1969, and was informed that the band would be continuing on without him. But the band did tell him that it was his choice on how to break the news to the public, and he said simply in a statement to the media that he no longer saw eye-to-eye with the albums they were cutting. Jones was eventually replaced by Mick Taylor.

So, in mid-1969, Jones had hit rock bottom. His drug abuse was at an all-time high, and he had essentially been thrown out of the very band he helped create. But, Jones was still keen on trying to break back into the music business, and some people noted that he was in the stages to put together a new band.

Sadly, those plans never came to be.

On July 3, 1969, Brian Jones was found dead inside the swimming pool of his home (which was the same residence where Winnie-The-Pooh was written by A.A. Milne). He was 27 years old.

The reported cause of death was “death by misadventure”, and Jones' heart and liver were heavily damaged by drug and alcohol abuse.



Brian Jones was just one of many musicians who fell into the aptly named '27 Club', musicians who died at the age of 27, usually at their own hands. A club which also includes Jimi Hendrix, Janis Joplin, Jim Morrison, Kurt Cobain, and Amy Winehouse.

Two days after Jones died, The Rolling Stones played a free concert in London's Hyde Park, which was dedicated in memory of their former bandmate. Jones read excerpts of the poem “Adonais”, stagehands released hundreds of white butterflies into the sky, and the band started off their playlist with one of Brian Jones' favourite songs, a Johnny Winters song called “I'm Yours and I'm Hers”.

Bill Wyman and Charlie Watts were the only members of the band to attend Jones' funeral. Mick Jagger was in Australia with Marianne Faithfull to begin filming for the movie 'Ned Kelly', and their contracts prevented either of them from delaying the trip to attend the funeral. Keith Richards, perhaps the one member that Jones clashed with the most, remained at a recording studio.

So, there you have it. Brian Jones. A classic case of living too hard and dying too young.

Many years after Jones was found dead, a journalist from Rolling Stone magazine had asked Mick Jagger if he had felt any sort of guilt over not being able to help Jones before he died. Here was Mick's response.

"No, I don't really. I do feel that I behaved in a very childish way, but we were very young, and in some ways we picked on him. But, unfortunately, he made himself a target for it; he was very, very jealous, very difficult, very manipulative and if you do that in this kind of a group of people, you get back as good as you give, to be honest. I wasn't understanding enough about his drug addiction. No one seemed to know much about drug addiction. Things like LSD were all new. No one knew the harm. People thought cocaine was good for you."



Some final words to ponder as we conclude this look back on February 28, 1942.