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Friday, December 20, 2013

Merry Christmas, Mr. Bean!

It's just five days to go until Christmas arrives, and with that, “THE POP CULTURE ADDICT'S ADVENT CALENDAR” is already in full swing!



With this being Day #20, I thought that I would give today's entry a little bit of British flavour, by doing a festive look at one holiday favourite! Or, at least, it happens to be a holiday favourite in my house.

Seriously, I have to watch this television special at least once during the holiday season.



Now, I have to admit that I do love British television. From “Are You Being Served?” to “Doctor Who”, some of the best television that I have ever seen has come from the United Kingdom. “EastEnders” and “Coronation Street” have entertained fans of soap operas for years, “Grange Hill” was certainly a hit with the kids, and my sister just happens to be a huge fan of the television series “Keeping Up Appearances”.

(That's that show that has that character named Hyacinthe Bucket, though she likes to pronounce it like Bouquet.)

On a personal level though, one of my all-time British made television programs happens to have been a show that ran for six years, but only produced fifteen episodes. I know, it seems almost unheard of, right?

Well, there's a reason for that. The show was entirely made up of prime time and holiday specials that when compiled together made up practically a whole season of episodes.

A season that stretched six years, mind you.

As it so happens, I can watch all the episodes of this particular show whenever I want because I own the DVD compilation of the series that was brought out by A&E a decade ago. I grew up watching the series when it aired on both PBS and CBC. How could I resist?

From the very first episode in which he takes an exam to the final episode where he reminisces about the time he watched a baby at the amusement park, had his car squashed by a tank, and ended up naked in the middle of a hotel, this man has done it all...and had the most absolute worst luck doing it!

Though that is to the genius of comedic genius Rowan Atkinson for creating a character who is a bit of a simple-minded oaf, yet is innocent enough that you can't help but love him.



Yes, between 1989 and 1995, Mr. Bean entertained audiences all over the world with his successful television program. Two Mr. Bean feature films would later follow.


And, I have to say that I absolutely love every single episode of Mr. Bean. I literally could watch them over and over again. And, given that we're experiencing ice rain conditions, I think that might be a great way to spend today!

Now, because we're at the tail end of the advent calendar, I think you know what episode of Mr. Bean we'll be watching this time around. We're going to be viewing the classic “Merry Christmas, Mr. Bean”. It is the seventh episode of the series, and appropriately enough it aired for the first time on December 24, 1992.

And, before we discuss it, you might as well watch it! So, sit down, grab a drink and a portion of figgy pudding, and click HERE for the full 23-minute episode. Don't worry. I'm not going anywhere. Enjoy!

Did you like it? I hope you did! Now, let's talk about it!

Now, every single city in the world has that one special department store in which most people love to do their shopping. New York City has Macy's, Toronto has the Eaton Centre, my hometown has...well...Walmart.

In London though, the real hot spot is the famous Harrods Department Store. And, for Mr. Bean's Christmas special, it happens to be the setting for Act 1. And, well...let's just say that Mr. Bean's maturity levels clearly rival that of a four year old on the naughty chair. He yanks the beard off of Santa and ends up plunging the entire exterior of the store into darkness! But you know, I do have to admit that I like his idea of testing Christmas ornaments by dropping them from a significant height! Why would anybody buy Christmas ornaments that smash on the ground so easily?

And, I think that I was one of the ones who was laughing out loud when Mr. Bean came face to face with a nativity scene! I'm not exactly sure how the Jurassic Park/Doctor Who references tied into the birth of Baby Jesus, but it was such a hoot to watch! Let's watch that scene again!



Though I will say this. Christmas may be a time of sharing, joy, and giving. Well, Mr. Bean doesn't exactly do any of this. He's pretty much celebrating the spirit of Christmas by being a complete Scrooge...and he isn't even aware of the fact that he is coming across this way! I guess in some manner, that sort of makes it funnier to watch because right around this time of year, you very rarely see anybody who has so little self-awareness that even they can't see why people are so annoyed by them.

Well, unless you work retail and you see someone pitching a fit on Christmas Eve because they are surprised to learn that the items they want on their lists are not there. Trust me, this time of year, I see that sort of thing a lot!

Now, that's not to say that Mr. Bean does not completely ignore the spirit of Christmas. He does stop a pickpocket and donates the items that he stole to charity, and he gets into the Christmas spirit by leading an orchestra in a rousing chorus of carols.

But then he steals the town square Christmas tree and cheats in order to win a fourteen kilogram turkey. I suppose even the people who lack self-awareness knows exactly what goes into what makes a traditional Christmas.

TRIVIA: The scene where Mr. Bean calculates the turkey's weight by using a household scale and a calculator is left off the A&E DVD version...but is curiously shown in the repeat airings of the broadcast on television. Weird.

Once he gets home, he sets up three stockings – one for himself, one for his beloved teddy bear, and one for a mouse that lives in the corner (which seems like a lovely gesture, I must admit). He also comes up with the idea to create a Christmas cracker with twelve times the fuses that make that popping sound when they are pulled. Hope he doesn't regret that decision! But then the old Bean comes out when a group of Christmas carolers come singing at the door and he slams the door in their faces without giving them a single piece of delicious chocolate.

Hell, if I were one of the carollers, I probably would have beaned him one.

Alas, Christmas morning finally arrives, and Mr. Bean is excited to open up his gifts. Mr. Bean gets a pair of socks, Teddy gets brand new button eyes, and the mouse even gets a piece of cheese...

...attached to a mousetrap.

And, for Christmas lunch, Mr. Bean is setting up the table for two as his girlfriend, Irma Gobb (Matilda Ziegler) is planning on spending the holiday with him.

Now, how Mr. Bean even ended up having a girlfriend is beyond me. He certainly never treated her with much respect...or even much love for that matter. But silly Irma Gobb never gives up. After all, Mr. Bean did promise her that when she was looking in a store window, he would buy her exactly what she wanted in the window. And, well, since the window display was for a jewelry store, she has made it clear that if he likes her then he should put a ring on it.

Of course, Irma seems to have the absolute worst timing. She arrives as Mr. Bean is preparing the Christmas turkey, and...oh dear.



Let it be known that they did the same gag on an episode of “Friends” as well, but Mr. Bean did it first...and did it better, as far as I'm concerned.

So, anyway, after the turkey is pried off of his head (which causes a nasty knock on Irma's head), the duo sit down to a dinner of...cranberry sandwiches...which sounds nasty, but might not be as bad as it sounds. Irma tries to trick Bean into kissing her under the mistletoe, but Mr. Bean seems more interested in the present she gave him and snatches it without kissing Irma at all.

Now, I will say that Irma is a master of gift giving. She gave him a model kit – the perfect gift for a five year old trapped in the body of a 37-year-old. But Irma feels that it is worth it if it means that she gets her ring.

Unfortunately...Mr. Bean completely misunderstood. Horribly.


And as a dejected, hurt, and angry Irma storms off in a huff (which really should have happened earlier in the episode), the episode ends in a rather explosive manner.

So, that's what happens when Mr. Bean celebrates Christmas. Now, I ask this question...would you want to celebrate Christmas with Bean? Absolutely not. But does Mr. Bean's Christmas make you feel a lot better about how you celebrate Christmas? I know it does for me! My Christmas celebrations could NEVER be as much of a train wreck as Mr. Bean's clearly was!

So, that ends day #20. Coming up on Day #21, a holiday cartoon special starring a cat, a dog, a guy named Doc Boy, and the world's coolest grandmother!

Thursday, December 19, 2013

Dear Santa...



Hello, everybody!  This is Day #19 of "THE POP CULTURE ADDICT'S ADVENT CALENDAR", and before I go ahead with today's video blog, I thought that I would post an introductory video that will set the tone for today's blog.  It's actually a song by my friends (well, okay, they aren't really my "friends" as I've never met either one) Carnie and Wendy Wilson, the daughters of Brian Wilson and two-thirds of the 1990's all-girl group Wilson Phillips.




Now, while Carnie and Wendy are singing about going on a sleigh ride with their one true love, you notice that they're addressing Santa Claus in the music video.  And, really, that is exactly what this blog is all about.  Letters to Santa Claus.

I know that most every single one of you that celebrate Christmas must have written letters to Santa Claus at least once in your lives.  For me, it was an annual tradition for me to do up a Christmas list and send it away to Santa Claus in hopes that he would make at least one of my wishes come true!  

I know that when I was really young, I dropped off a letter to Santa Claus in the mailbox and sent it off to the North Pole.  Even after all these years, I still remember the postal code that you had to send it to.  H0H 0H0.  Get it?  HO HO HO?

(And, yes...I'm quite aware that Canada has some really wacky postal codes.  We use both letters and numbers!)

And for what it was worth, I always got a response back, along with the promise that I would get at least one of the things that I asked for on my list.  And you know what?  He always delivered on his promises.

And, sometimes I would write a letter, and it would be printed in the pages of the local newspaper.  It was a lot of fun trying to look through all the pages of the newspaper in hopes of finding your letter inside!  



Of course, nowadays, letter writing really does seem to be a dying art.  I mean, why write a letter when you can just link to all the items you want to have for Christmas by clicking on them with a computer mouse?

(Though I do have to admit that I did chuckle when I first saw the above letter making the rounds on Google.  It's creative, and at least the kid did actually write the stuff down!  I honestly don't even know if this letter is legitimate, but regardless, I did enjoy it.)


But with the cost of stamps rising (in particular within my home country of Canada where stamps are being raised to a ridiculous price), and more and more people sending e-mail and text messages to each other, I am feeling a bit sad that handwritten letters and cards are being phased out.

I mean, I know that technology does mean progress, but I also think that technology is sort of sucking all the fun out of simple pleasures such as writing Christmas cards.  Many people I know hate doing them, but I absolutely love sending them.

And, because I feel so strongly about keeping the tradition of mailing letters to Santa alive, for this edition of the Thursday Video Blog, I decided that I would write my own letter to Santa.

And, no I have not lost my mind.  I really did write a letter to Santa.


And to close this blog off...here's visual proof!  Tah-dah!



Wednesday, December 18, 2013

Shrek The Halls

With only one week to go before Christmas, I still have a few topics left to discuss for the 2013 edition of “THE POP CULTURE ADDICT'S ADVENT CALENDAR”!



Hi, and welcome to Day #18 of the calendar. And, hey...it just so happens to be one of those Whatever Wednesday entries!

Yes, today is the day in which we pull out the Clue cards for another day, select a character card at random, and do a blog entry on whatever the card tells me to do.

So, shall we draw a character out of the bag? Who are we going to see today, and what will today's subject be all about?



Interesting. Today we've drawn the Mrs. Peacock card, which means that we're going to be talking about a television series. I know, it seems to be a bit of overkill, given that I talked about a holiday show yesterday, and plan on doing at least two more television based holiday features on Friday and Saturday this week, but the way I see it, how often do I get the opportunity to talk about Christmas themed television? Not a lot! I say we go with it!

Now, here's the kicker. What holiday special do I talk about this week? I've pretty much covered all of the good ones over the last two years. Hmmm...maybe if I go through my own personal collection of Christmas themed DVD's, I might be able to find something. Let's see here...



Okay, I've already done Rudolph the Red-Nosed Reindeer and Frosty the Snowman, so that's out. I've already done a feature on “How The Grinch Stole Christmas”. “A Charlie Brown Christmas was one of the very first holiday themed blogs that I wrote on this blog. And as for “The Simpsons”, I just did a feature on them yesterday. What do I do?

Oh, wait. I don't think I've done this one yet.



Ah, yes. Now I remember. I have a funny story to tell in regards to this particular DVD. You see, it was actually kind of an impulse purchase that I made while I was at a store that...gasp...I don't work at! Now, normally, if there's something that I really want to buy, I will most likely purchase it at the retail outlet I work for. After all, the employee discount can be quite tempting. But it turns out that at the store that I was in, this particular DVD had more of a bonus. Sure, as far as the sticker price went, I was only saving a cent...and given that Canada has deep-sixed the penny, that's not really much of a deal. However, there was a coupon attached to the DVD that said that I could get a free bag of Orville Redenbacher flavoured popcorn with purchase. And, you know me...I never complain about getting free stuff!

By the way, a little off topic here, but try the white cheddar flavour of that popcorn. It tastes just like Smartfood, but at a much lower cost!

So, with popcorn in hand, I set up the DVD player, and inserted “Shrek the Halls” into the player...a television special that originally aired on television November 28, 2007.

And right off the bat, the one thing that I particularly appreciate about this Christmas special is that all of the voice actors from the Shrek movie series came back to voice their respective characters in "Shrek the Halls"!  Mike Myers returns as Shrek, Eddie Murphy as Donkey, Cameron Diaz as Fiona, Antonio Banderas as Puss in Boots, and, well...you get the idea!  




And for what it's worth, it's a really nice Christmas special.  Probably one of the better Christmas specials to be released over the last ten years or so...at least, in my opinion anyway.

So, anyway, "Shrek the Halls" apparently takes place between "Shrek the Third" and "Shrek Forever After", as Shrek and Fiona have settled into life as the parents of their toddler aged triplets.  The television special begins on a hot summer day in the middle of Shrek's swamp (as evidenced by Seals and Crofts' "Summer Breeze" playing in the background).  But what is strange about the scene is that as Shrek is giving his babies a bath, Donkey comes up to him singing Christmas carols!

Now, for the average person, listening to Christmas carols - let alone singing them - in the middle of summer would be the epitome of weirdness.  But then again, I suppose that in general, Donkey isn't exactly the very definition of normal regardless, so for him, it's normal.




It also seems to be normal for Donkey to annoy Shrek every chance he gets, and when Shrek asks Donkey what he's doing, Donkey proudly announces that it is only 159 days until the event known as Christmas comes, and of course, Shrek makes out that he has absolutely no idea what Donkey is talking about, so he shoos him away.  And over the course of the next 158 days, Donkey continues to annoy Shrek with Christmas songs, even as the leaves fall from the trees and snow blankets the ground.  

By the time Christmas Eve comes, the swamp has become a winter wonderland, and by this time, Fiona and the kids are very excited about the upcoming holiday.  Fiona in particular wants the Christmas season to be especially memorable as it will be the first one that she and Shrek would be spending with their new babies.  And, of course Shrek wants to be able to give Fiona and the kids the greatest Christmas ever.

But there's just one problem.  Shrek doesn't exactly know what makes a good Christmas.  In fact, Shrek is so clueless about how to celebrate Christmas that he actually drops by a bookstore in Far Far Away and buys a book on how to create the perfect holiday celebration!  I mean, how hard can it be?  You buy some food for the Christmas dinner, you decorate the place with some decorations, put up a Christmas tree, and maybe a few presents.  And then at the end of it all, you tell Christmas fables and sing Christmas songs.  What could go wrong?

Well, for starters, if Shrek intended for he and Fiona to have a quiet celebration with the kids at home this Christmas, the well-meaning Donkey would throw a monkey wrench into Shrek's plans.

You see, Donkey pretty much invited every single creature who ever crossed Shrek's path to spend the holidays with Shrek and Fiona!  The Three Little Pigs, The Big Bad Wolf, Pinocchio, Gingy, The Three Blind Mice, and Puss In Boots all drop by to spread Christmas cheer.  Even Donkey brings along his wife and kids!

(Keeping in mind that Donkey's wife is a dragon that is 1000 times Donkey's size!)


So, everybody is having a grand old time dancing to pop music, eating the large spread of food, and spreading the love of Christmas...

...everyone except Shrek that is.  He's extremely angry that Donkey hijacked his whole Christmas celebration and he is starting to see red.

But, hey, with Shrek's green skin, the red goes well with the colour scheme.




Shrek can't even get the chance to tell his Christmas story, as Donkey, Puss in Boots, and Gingy all tell their own stories.  Donkey talks about parade floats made of edible goodies, Puss in Boots gets distracted by Christmas ornaments, and Gingy tells more of a horror story as he explains how Santa ate his girlfriend!

And just when Shrek isn't annoyed enough by his friends, Donkey comes across Shrek's book on "Christmas for Village Idiots", which sets Shrek over the edge!  And as Shrek tries to grab the book from Donkey, a commotion causes the food to be spilled, the decorations to be smashed, and the Christmas tree to go up in flames like a Roman candle!

Which in turn causes Shrek to throw Donkey and crew outside in the cold snow!  Naturally, Donkey and his friends are very upset that Shrek would treat them this way on Christmas Eve, and the Three Little Pigs offer to take Donkey and the rest of the crew in.

But Shrek is saddened to learn that Fiona has packed up the kids, and announces that she will be spending Christmas with Donkey after she is absolutely appalled at how badly he treated their friends.  And, as Fiona and the kids set out to try and apologize on behalf of the family, a depressed Shrek is left alone in his shack, pondering what went wrong.  It's only until he spots a Christmas card sent to him by Donkey that he starts to have a change of heart and he realizes that he's been a real...well...ogre to everyone.

But there's a good reason behind it...well, as good a reason as one can have.  You see, ogres don't really have much to celebrate.  Prior to the release of Shrek's first movie in 2001, ogres were scary creatures whom everyone feared.  Why would ogres celebrate birthdays?  Why would they celebrate Christmas when they were doomed to spend every Christmas alone?

So, it's no wonder why Shrek was so clueless about Christmas.  He never experienced one.  But of course, no matter how well planned a Christmas celebration is, something always seems to go wrong.  And, that was fine, because it's not about having the biggest tree, or having the most expensive presents, or having the plumpest turkey on the table.  It's about who you spend the holidays with that matter.  And, while Shrek had to learn that lesson the hard way, I think he eventually got the message.

And so ends Day #18 of the advent calendar.  Tomorrow on Day #19, it's time for another video blog.  And in this video blog, I write a letter to the man in the big red suit!

No kidding!  I'm serious!  But, to be fair, I also talk about letters to Santa in general, so it's not QUITE as weird as I made it out to be.  

Tuesday, December 17, 2013

December 17, 1989

We're just days away from completing “THE POP CULTURE ADDICT'S ADVENT CALENDAR” for another year! Kind of makes you feel a lot of emotions, doesn't it? You may feel sad that the holiday entries are drawing to a close for another year, or you may feel happy because the holiday entries are drawing to a close, or you might feel anxious and nervous because Christmas Eve is next week and you still haven't made any preparations for the event.

In which case, I must ask “WHAT ARE YOU WAITING FOR?!?”



Regardless, welcome to Day #17 of the calendar. And in this Tuesday Timeline, I plan on doing a blog topic on a television holiday episode that was very special. It also happens to be the very first episode of a long-running television series!

Imagine that, a television series that kicked off as a Christmas special! Not too many television series can boast that claim to fame, can they?

Of course, before we get into the holiday discussion of a classic Christmas television show, we should probably take a look at what else happened in the world on December 17.

497 BC – The first Saturnalia festival was celebrated in ancient Rome

942 – William I of Normandy is assassinated

1538 – Henry VIII of England is excommunicated by Pope Paul III

1718 – Great Britain declares war on Spain

1837 – A fire in the Winter Palace of Saint Petersburg kills over thirty guards

1892 – The first issue of Vogue Magazine is published

1903 – The Wright Brothers make their first powered, heavier-than-air flight in the “Wright Flyer” at Kitty Hawk

1938 – Otto Hahn discovers the nuclear fission of uranium

1944 – The Malmedy Massacre during the Battle of the Bulge occurs, which leaves eighty POW's dead at the hands of their German captors

1951 – The Civil Rights Congress delivers “We Charge Genocide” to the United Nations

1961 – The world's largest circus tragedy occurs as fire sweeps through the Gran Circus American circus grounds in Rio De Janeiro, Brazil

1967 – Harold Holt, then Prime Minister of Australia, disappears while swimming near Victoria and is presumed drowned

1969 – The United States Air Force closes its study on UFO's

1981 – Brigadier General James L. Dozier is abducted by the Red Brigades in Verona, Italy

1997 – The United Kingdom commences its Firearms Act 1997, which extended the ban on firearms to include all handguns with the exception of antique and show pieces

1999 – American jazz singer Grover Washington Jr. (b. 1943) dies at the age of 56

2009 – Actress Jennifer Jones (b. 1919) passes away in Malibu, California at age 90

2010 – Mohamed Bouazizi set himself of fire, marking the catalyst of the Tunisian Revolution

2011 – Controversial North Korean leader Kim-Jong-il dies at the age of 70

We've also got a long list of famous birthdays for you today, and turning one year older are Dave Madden, Pope Francis, Tommy Steele, Bernard Hill, Ernie Hudson, Chris Matthews, Eugene Levy, Barry Livingston, Bill Pullman, Peter Farrelly, Mike Mills (R.E.M.), Sara Dallin (Bananarama), Craig Berube, Gigi D'Agostino, Chuck Liddell, Mick Quinn (Supergrass), Sean Patrick Thomas, Duff Goldman, Sarah Paulson, Giovanni Ribisi, Marissa Ribisi, Nick Dinsmore, Milla Jovovich, Jaimee Foxworth, Craig Kielburger, and Emma Bell.

All right. Now that we have all that out of the way, why don't we go ahead with today's Tuesday Timeline date.



How about going back in time twenty-four years to December 17, 1989?

Now, December 17, 1989 was a huge day for the world of television, particularly for the fairly new television network known as FOX. As we counted down the final days of the 1980s, FOX had only been on the air for a total of three years. And, while the network did have success stories in the television sitcom “Married...With Children”, and the sketch comedy show “The Tracey Ullman Show”, it really wasn't performing as well as other networks. Comparing FOX to NBC, CBS, and ABC, FOX placed a distant last place in the ratings. But, by the time 1989 rolled around, FOX decided to try something brand new. And that something would be inspired by one of the most popular features from “The Tracey Ullman” Show.



Now, “The Tracey Ullman Show” debuted on air in 1987, and the star of the show was British comedienne Tracey Ullman. She performed as several characters on the show, and even had a brief singing career in the early 1980s, with the song below being her biggest hit.

Well, in 1987, Ullman came up with the idea to create a show that was quite similar in style to “Saturday Night Live” and “SCTV”. And the show itself did quite well. People tuned in and watched the program during its four season run (it ran from April 1987 until May 1990), and it even won three Emmy Awards between 1989 and 1990.

And, here's an interesting fact that I didn't even know at the time. Apparently all of the choreography done on “The Tracey Ullman Show” was organized by then up and coming pop starlet Paula Abdul!



Anyway, what was interesting about the show was that the series only had six regular actors and actresses that appeared in the opening credits of the show. There was Ullman, Sam McMurray, Joseph Malone, Anna Levine, Julie Kavner, and Dan Castellaneta.

You might be wondering why I've bolded those last two names. Some of you may have figured out what the topic is by this alone, but I'll explain. You see, Kavner and Castellaneta were regular fixtures on the program. They acted in almost every other sketch and you could tell that they both had great chemistry together. Don't believe me? Click HERE, and you can watch Dan and Julie acting out a sketch from “The Tracey Ullman Show” right around the time it debuted in April 1987.

Oh, yeah...did I mention that in addition to the live-action sketches that Dan and Julie also worked on some animated sketches too? You see, one of the most popular sketches to be shown on “The Tracey Ullman Show” featured a suburban couple trying to raise their three young children in a household filled with chaos. Castellaneta and Kavner played the parents. As for the kids, the roles were filled in by voice actresses Nancy Cartwright and Yeardley Smith. Now, the animated shorts only appeared in one-minute vignettes, but people seemed to love them. I actually admit to being a seven year old boy and only watching “The Tracey Ullman Show” to watch these cartoon shorts. They were incredibly crude and loud and the weirdest cartoons that I had ever watched, but I knew that I had to watch them because for some reason, they mesmerized me, and I couldn't get enough.

Leave it to creator Matt Groening to make a cartoon that drew people in.

Little did Matt know just how successful the cartoon shorts would become. The shorts became so popular that it was decided that the family would create a holiday special to air during the Christmas season of 1989 to air exclusively on FOX. It would be the first full length half-hour program to star this cartoon family, and it would be a Christmas episode at that. Little did anybody know that twenty-four years later that the holiday special would be the beginning of a brand new television series...and that the series would STILL be on the air twenty-four years later!



Yes, on December 17, 1989, the episode “Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire” debuted on FOX. It would also serve as the pilot episode for the long running series “The Simpsons”, which has aired a total of 538 episodes and counting as of December 17, 2013!

So, for this edition of the Tuesday Timeline, let's take a look at how this juggernaut began. A time before the video games, the comic books, the DVD box sets, and the 2007 film came out.

Now, I can't seem to recall any other pilot episode that was Christmas themed. I really can't. And, a part of me wonders if “Simpsons Roasting on an Open Fire” was meant to just be a one-off Christmas special, and that it was such a ratings winner that it spawned a 13-episode season in early 1990. I imagine that a full season was planned regardless, but it's interesting that they started the show with a Christmas episode...especially given that the show has aired almost twenty-five Halloween episodes!

Now, of course, everyone knows that “The Simpsons” was never going to be a show that was sugary-sweet like “The Cosby Show” or “Full House”. And, it was fairly risky for FOX to try their hand at an animated sitcom at the time “The Simpsons” first debuted. Prior to “The Simpsons” premiere episode, the last animated prime-time sitcom to air was “The Flintstones”, which ended its run 23 years earlier. But the network took a gamble, and it seemingly paid off. And, of course, the show did have its critics – some of which complained that the show was sending bad messages to the youth of the nation. But, compare “The Simpsons” to the likes of “South Park” and “Family Guy”, and it's actually quite tame. In fact, the very first full-length episode of “The Simpsons” had a lovely story behind it.

In this episode, the opening scenes take place at Springfield Elementary, in which we are first introduced to the Simpson family. We have the boorish Homer (Castellaneta), overprotective Marge (Kavner), bratty Bart (Cartwright), intelligent Lisa (Smith), and the silent Maggie, who has basically been sucking her pacifier for almost two and a half decades. Think of the dental bills that baby's going to have!

Anyway, we peer into the kids' Christmas pageant, where Lisa entertains us with a tribal dance from the South Seas, and where Bart gets yanked off the stage by Principal Skinner (Harry Shearer) after he bastardizes the Christmas carol “Jingle Bells”.

Hmmm...maybe THAT'S where I got my inspiration from!



Anyway, one of the constant complaints that I have about the holiday is the fact that Christmas has become too materialistic and commercial these days. It frosts my britches to see people only think about what they will be getting for Christmas and not focusing on what they can give. Of course, in the Simpson family, it seemingly starts out as just another money obsessed Christmas. And for the Simpsons, Christmas 1989 is looking like it will be the best Christmas ever. With Homer expecting a big fat Christmas bonus from his boss at the nuclear power plant where he works, and Marge stashing away a huge jar of money in her towering beehive hairdo, there's no way that Christmas could be ruined, right?

Well, let's just say that a couple of instances happen in which the family's Christmas fund is all but wiped out.

Here's a tip for all of you reading this. If you're taking your ten-year-old son out to the shopping mall to do some Christmas shopping, make sure that there are no tattoo parlors located within the mall, and make sure that you never leave your son unattended near said tattoo parlor. Because then your son might have the dumb idea that the best gift that they could possibly give to their mother is a tattoo that shows just how much he loves her. Of course, Marge discovers Bart's little scheme just before the tattoo gets finished, and Bart is left with a tattoo that says “MOTH”.



What is interesting is that Springfield happens to have a clinic in town that specializes in tattoo removal. The unfortunate thing is that tattoo removal in 1989 was a costly procedure...and it emptied out all of the money that Marge had saved all year long. But, while Marge was furious with Bart for having to use the Christmas money to get a tattoo removed, Marge was still relieved that Homer would be getting a bonus at work. They could use that instead of the jar.

Except that there was no Christmas bonus at all. Turns out that the pilot episode was also our first introduction to the cheapskate known as C. Montgomery Burns. And, Homer's boss took great delight in announcing that there would be no Christmas bonus for any of his employees (except maybe his lapdog Smithers, who is surprisingly absent in this episode).  So, we have Homer upset that he is not getting any extra money for Christmas, but is secretly thanking his lucky stars that Marge at least had the big jar of money.

So, you can imagine the disappointment when Marge explained what happened with the jar of money, it left Homer very crestfallen.  Of course, Homer didn't want to make Marge and the kids worry too much about Christmas by telling him that he didn't get his Christmas bonus, so he didn't tell them.  But seeing the following image below, we get an idea as to how devastated Homer really is.



Say what you want about his parenting skills, Homer really loves his family and is upset when there's nothing that he can do to make sure that his kids have a fantastic Christmas.

Homer does attempt to put a positive spin on things.  He buys all the gifts at a dollar store, he chops down a Christmas tree from some man's land - nearly getting caught in the process, and he even takes on a job as a department store Santa Claus in hopes of making enough money to even salvage Christmas for the year.  But when a bratty Bart pulls off Homer's beard, and Homer's pay is heavily garnished by taxes, Homer is forced to explain the situation to Bart, who actually takes it a lot better than I probably would have at age ten.  

Still, Homer is praying for a Christmas miracle, and when Barney Gumble (Homer's alcoholic best friend from school) informs him of a Christmas Eve dog race which could see Homer's twelve dollar takehome pay turn into twelve hundred dollars, Homer doesn't hesitate to take part.  But even though Barney has basically told him which dog will win the race, Homer notices that one of the dogs has a rather festive name, and he tells Bart that it must be fate.  Homer bets everything he has on Dog #8 in the race, even though the odds of #8 winning are abnormally high.  

And, well...Homer's instincts did not pan out.  Dog #8 came in last place, and now Homer had zero dollars for Christmas.  However would he tell his family?

But then Bart notices that dog #8 is being chased out of the park by its now former owner.  The dog is visibly scared, and it's assumed that the owner of the dog was not happy with him losing again.  But as fate would have it, the dog leaps into Homer's arms and decides that Homer and Bart would be able to provide him with a more domesticated life than that of racetrack underdog.  And with a little encouragement from Bart, Homer decides to take in the homeless pooch...still wondering how he was going to tell his family that Christmas was ruined.


Little did Homer know that bringing home the dog would turn out to be the best Christmas present ever!  Lisa and Maggie adored the dog at first sight, and even Marge was impressed that Homer brought home such a wonderful gift!  And as the episode ends, the entire family gathers around the piano to sing Christmas carols, along with their brand new family member.

Oh, one more thing.  The dog's name that Homer bet on?  "Santa's Little Helper".  And, I think we all can agree that the dog definitely lived up to its name that Christmas Day.

It's hard to believe that episode aired twenty-four years ago today!  I watched it when it first debuted, and I was only eight then!  But I think it also happens to be the Simpsons' best Christmas themed episode (though the one in which Bart shoplifts a video game was also very well done).

And, that is our look back on December 17, 1989, as well as Day #17 of the advent calendar.  Tune in tomorrow for the eighteenth day of the calendar, as well as the Whatever Wednesday for today!

Monday, December 16, 2013

Jack Frost (1998)

Hello there, everybody! I can't believe that we're less than ten days away from Christmas! And, I can't believe that in less than two weeks from now, we'll be wrapping up “THE POP CULTURE ADDICT'S ADVENT CALENDAR” for another year. I can't believe that we're already at Day #16 already!



But don't worry. I've got a few more holiday themed topics on my to-do list, and I promise you that the next nine days will be filled with lots of fun, excitement, and well...snow!

Don't believe me about the snow? Well, try this on for size! I decided to do a video introduction for today's featured Monday Matinee. And the reason why I have done this is because today's topic kind of matches up with the theme of today's blog!

So, have a look at the video introduction. Such as it is.



Okay, so in filming this video, I learned a couple of things. One, never film a video using an iPad mini in a snowstorm. It took everything in me to try and keep my composure as snowflakes kept melting on the touch screen. But, hey, I was only outside for two or three minutes, so I don't think I did any permanent damage to it. I mean, it still works fine, and I do have a protective cover on it.

Two, I should probably have made up a script for the introduction rather than go live. As I have explained before, public speaking is definitely not my forte, and this video is kind of a painful reminder as to why that is. Not that it's absolutely one hundred per cent horrible, but I would never win an award at the Sundance Film Festival for it either...or even an A+ in a high school film making class.

And, three, I actually filmed this video piece the day before, on December 15. There was only one rare opportunity in which the snow was still falling, and I wanted to make sure I caught that opportunity while I still has the chance. Of course, as I look out my window on the early morning hours of the 16th, it is snowing again. But, that's the chance you take, right?



At any rate, as mentioned in the video above, I'm going to be discussing the 1998 holiday film “Jack Frost”, which starred Michael Keaton, Kelly Preston, Joseph Cross, and at least three of the four children that Frank Zappa fathered during his lifetime!

Now, as I was trying to explain in the video blog introduction (not exactly clearly, might I add), Jack Frost is the guy who makes wintery things happen during the coldest days of the year. With just one touch of the finger, Jack Frost can freeze trees, flowers, fields, and other things by coating them with either white fluffy snow or solid, frozen ice sheets. And, of course, his time for play usually takes place during the months of December and March.

(Or, if you happen to live in Canada, Jack Frost can make an appearance in October or even September!)

Now, in most cases, Jack Frost takes on more or less the same form. In most examples of pop culture that I can find, Jack Frost resembles a creature similar to an elf. Sometimes he can be as cute as a Smurf, while other times, he can appear as unique looking as Dobby the house elf from the Harry Potter series. Depending on the television program or book you may have seen a reference to Jack Frost in, Jack can vary between a guy who is cool yet misunderstood to a complete and total villain, determined to turn the world into a gigantic snow ball.

(Actually, that last sentence certainly describes Mr. Freeze from Batman as well.  Maybe I'm confusing the two and don't know it.)

In the case of this movie, Jack Frost comes in a couple of different forms.  But worry not.  Both are the good version of Frost...though when we are first introduced to him, he may not appear to be all that good.

You see, Jack Frost is a living, breathing human being at the beginning of the movie.  Frost (Keaton) is the frontman of his band "The Jack Frost Band" (lamest name ever, might I add).  He's not only the lead singer of the band, but he also plays the harmonica.  Together with his bandmates, Jack Frost tours various places in Colorado performing blues standards in hopes of landing a record deal to make it big.



And, for what it's worth, "The Jack Frost Band" sounds pretty good.  Certainly one of the most liveliest versions of "Frosty the Snowman" that I've ever heard!

Of course, Jack Frost's quest for fame comes at a cost.  Because of his commitment touring all over the state as well as using all of his energy to create new songs to submit as demos for record company executives, he doesn't get to spend as much time with his wife Gabby (Preston) and his son Charlie (Cross) as he would like to.  Any moment that he gets to spend with his family are few and far between, but regardless, Charlie and Jack make the most of their time together when they have it.  And one day, when Jack is home for the whole day, he and Charlie build their own version of "Frosty the Snowman", which Jack offers to help him build following a confrontation that Charlie has with a bully named Rory (Taylor Handley).  



Jack also gives Charlie a small present.  It's a harmonica that Jack received as a present on the day that Charlie was born.  It is Jack's most prized possession, and he wanted Charlie to have it, telling him that the harmonica has magical powers and that whenever he hears it, he'll be there.



Unfortunately, it's a rare moment of bonding that we see, as fate does everything it can to keep Jack away from his wife and child.  Jack promises his wife that he will be in attendance at Charlie's hockey game, but blows it off to record the ironically named song "Don't Lose Your Faith".  To make it up to them, Jack promises that he will give them a good old-fashioned Christmas vacation in the mountains of Colorado, but when "The Jack Frost Band" is given the opportunity of a lifetime, Jack decides that the gig is more important than Christmas with his family because if he lands a record deal, he'll be able to provide for his family better than he currently could.

What a twisted argument, huh?  He certainly wouldn't be named father of the year with that attitude, would he?

But, wait.  Jack Frost has a change of heart, and he decides that midway through the journey to the gig, he wants to go back home to spend Christmas with his family.  He borrows the car of his friend/keyboardist Mac MacArthur (Mark Addy), and drives back home.  And he almost makes it except for the fact that there's a really big snowstorm that day, and Mac's car doesn't have functional windshield wipers.  The end result, Jack crashes the car, and Frost is put on ice.  Permanently.

Flash forward a whole year, and Charlie is incredibly depressed over the death of his father.  He doesn't play hockey much any more, he withdraws from his friends, and he doesn't even feel much like celebrating Christmas at all.  His mother tries to help, but all Charlie wants is his father back.

Inspired by one of the final activities that Charlie did with Jack while he was still alive, Charlie builds a replica of the snowman that he and Jack built, and that night, he plays with the harmonica that Jack gave him just before the accident.  

Turns out that the "magic" that Jack promised that the harmonica had within it was more real than either Jack or Charlie had thought because when Charlie played the harmonica, Jack is resurrected...

...in the form of the snowman that Charlie built.

And, needless to say, when Jack tries to stage a warm reunion with Charlie, Charlie runs away in terror, leaving Jack feeling a little...well, cold.

Eventually, Charlie begins to piece everything together, and realizes that the living, breathing, snowman is his father's spirit, and the rest of the movie depicts Jack and Charlie trying to reconnect with each other once more.  But Jack only has a limited amount of time to share a lifetime of lessons with his son.  When the spring thaw comes, his time will be gone forever.  What's a recently re-animated snowman to do?

Well, I don't think I can really go into further detail in this case.  I'd be spoiling too much of the plot of the movie, and as you all know, I don't like spoiling movies, no matter how old they get...or in this case, how poorly received they were.

You see, "Jack Frost" was a box office bomb.  The producers actually spent more money making the film than the amount of money it took in at the box office.  Critics tore the film to shreds, and it was widely considered to be one of the worst holiday films of the 1990s.

But you know, watching this movie after a decade and a half has gone by, I don't think it's nearly as bad as people made it out to be.  Mind you, it'll never be up to the standards of "It's A Wonderful Life", "Miracle on 34th Street", or even "National Lampoon's Christmas Vacation", but for a holiday movie...well, I'd watch it again.

Well, we might as well end this blog topic off with a little bit of trivia.

1 - The snowman costume was designed by Jim Henson's Creature Shop.

2 - Believe it or not, George Clooney was originally supposed to play Jack Frost.  But when Clooney was offered the role of Batman in "Batman & Robin", he couldn't turn it down as he had always wanted to play Batman.

3 - Clooney leaving the project caused headaches for the Jim Henson Creature Shop, because they had to redo the entire costume!

4 - I mentioned earlier in the entry that three of Frank Zappa's kids appeared in the movie.  Dweezil played the role of a music executive, Ahmet was a snow plow driver, and Moon Unit played the role of a teacher.  

5 - Mark Addy, who played Mac in the film had just completed the movie "The Full Monty" when he was offered the role in "Jack Frost".

6 - This wouldn't be the first time that Joseph Cross and Michael Keaton would star in a film together.  The two also appeared together in the film "Desperate Measures".

7 - One of Eli's friends is played by Andrew Lawrence, the younger brother of "Blossom" star Joey Lawrence and "Boy Meets World" star Matthew Lawrence.

And, well...that's all the trivia I could unearth for this film.  Apparently, nobody cared enough to come up with more than that.

But I do have a very special surprise for the Tuesday Timeline entry for tomorrow...otherwise known as Day #17 of the Advent Calendar.  Not only will we be featuring a holiday television episode, but this holiday television episode happens to also be the PILOT episode of a long-running series!





Sunday, December 15, 2013

Here Comes Santa Claus




Hello, everybody!  And, welcome to the fifteenth day of "THE POP CULTURE ADDICT'S ADVENT CALENDAR"!  Can you believe it's Day #15 already?  It's just only ten days left to go until Christmas comes for yet another year!  

And this week on the Sunday Jukebox, I have a special treat for you.  I'm going to let the King of Rock and Roll entertain you for the week, as well as the country music star who inspired Elvis Presley to record this very single!



So, you're probably guessing that today's holiday favourite is going to be coming from Elvis Presley.  And, you would be correct in that regard.  In fact, today's selection will be coming straight from Elvis Presley's first Christmas album which was released fifty-six years ago in the autumn of 1957!

(If you happen to have a first edition copy of the album still in the shrink wrap, and still with the gold "To/From" label stuck on the outside, you may be sitting on a small fortune!)

Anyway, the album itself was released on October 15, 1957, and it contained some seasonal favourites as well as some original compositions.  The original songs were "Santa, Bring My Baby Back To Me" and "Santa Claus Is Back In Town".


As for the holiday favourites?  Well, they were there as well, albeit with some controversy.  I may have talked about this in a previous blog entry last year, but Elvis' interpretation of "White Christmas" was actually banned from several radio stations in the United States and Canada because "White Christmas" songwriter Irving Berlin disapproved of Elvis' cover version.

Well, okay...maybe a better description would be that Irving Berlin loathed Elvis' version of "White Christmas" so much that he felt as though Elvis had stolen the sheet music for the song from him and vomited all over it!  Whatever the case, Berlin was so disgusted by Presley's version that he had staff members call every radio station in Canada and the United States, ordering them to yank Elvis' Christmas album from airplay!

Most American stations refused Berlin's request.  Quite the opposite happened in Canada, where most stations refused to play the record.  And, honestly, I don't know what all the fuss was about, because I didn't mind Elvis' version.  Granted, Bing Crosby was the best one, but I had nothing against Elvis' version either.

Of course, I won't be talking about "White Christmas" in this blog.  I've already done a blog entry on that song.


Instead, I thought I would choose this song to talk about.  Why?  Well, we'll get to that in a minute.





ARTIST: Elvis Presley
SONG: Here Comes Santa Claus
ALBUM: Elvis' Christmas Album
DATE RELEASED: October 15, 1957
PEAK POSITION ON THE BILLBOARD CHARTS: N/A

"Here Comes Santa Claus".  Probably my favourite song off of Elvis' entire Christmas album.  I know I like it better than that horrible, horrible "Blue Christmas".  That song is so depressing, I almost want to take a pitchfork and stab a couple of elves with it!

DISCLAIMER:  I would never, ever harm an elf or any living creature.  Unless it happens to be Justin Bieber singing songs from HIS Christmas album...and even then, I probably wouldn't do it, as Christmas is not about hurting people.




Anyway, the song (which clocks in at just six seconds shy of two minutes), was originally written by country music singer Gene Autry and Oakley Haldeman, and first recorded by Autry a decade before Elvis recorded his version.  And if you watch the video below, you can hear Autry's 1947 interpretation below.




Would you like to know what inspired Autry to write the song?  It turns out that he was inspired by the 1946 Santa Claus Lane Parade (or the Hollywood Christmas Parade as it is known to be called now).  Gene Autry actually participated in the parade that year as he rode his horse down the main thoroughfare along with all of the other floats, performers, and marching bands that one typically found in parades.  And as it so happened, Autry was just a few places in front of Santa Claus and his sleigh.  So, naturally, as Autry travelled down the street, the spectators could be heard exclaiming "Here comes Santa Claus!"

So, that's how the song came to be.  It was inspired by spectators at a Christmas parade!  

Now, although Gene Autry's version is widely considered to be the most well-known and most successful version of "Here Comes Santa Claus" (It did reach the #9 position on the Billboard Charts in 1947), believe it or not, he was not the first person to record the single.  A demo version was released in 1946 by singer/guitarist Johnny Bond.  And here's an interesting fact about the song that I didn't even know until I researched this song for the blog entry today!  In Bond's demo version, he wanted to use a sound effect that simulated the jingling of sleigh bells, but didn't have any bells to use.  So he improvised by using ice cubes instead!

And of course, when Autry heard Bond's version, he was inspired to replicate the sleigh bell sound effect using real bells!

Over the years, besides Elvis and Gene Autry, other artists have recorded this song from Doris Day and Alvin and the Chipmunks to Mariah Carey and the cast of Glee.  And, why wouldn't they?  After all, every Christmas is capped off with the arrival of the man draped in red velvet, right?

This concludes a shorter than normal edition of the Sunday Jukebox (I'm cutting it short because as I type this out, we're having a blizzard, and I want to type this out before we lose power), but I promise you that I will make it up to you on Day #16.  And, what can we expect on Day #16?  How about one of the coolest snowmen you'll ever hope to meet?  And, no, it's not Frosty either!

Saturday, December 14, 2013

Super Mario Brothers 3 - The Ice World

I'm going to offer up a little bit of a confession here. I will admit that I am kind of cheating today in regards to today's topic.



As you know, we're smack dab in the middle of “THE POP CULTURE ADDICT'S ADVENT CALENDAR”. And, if you've been keeping track, we're currently on Day #14 of the event.

Of course you know that for the first twenty-five days of the month of December, we will be featuring a series of holiday themed entries, in which every reference has something to do with the Christmas season. But I knew that right off the bat that once I hit the second Saturday of December, I would be struggling.

You see, ever since I began doing the Saturday Smorgasbord theme day, I had decided that the second Saturday of the month would be dedicated towards video games. Problem is, how many Christmas themed video games are there in the world? Not very many. The only one that I can think of right off the bat is “Parasite Eve”, and unfortunately, it's one of those survival horror games.  Somehow, a possessed opera singer who sets people on fire in the middle of Carnegie Hall isn't exactly the best way to wish somebody a merry Christmas.

No, for today I wanted to make the theme fun.  But with such few selections for holiday video games available, whatever would I do?

I know!  What if I "cheat" a little by doing a blog topic on a video game that I received as a Christmas present years ago?  And, what if the blog topic had to do with a level within said game that could really make anyone feel as if they're in a living, breathing Christmas card?  


Well, a Christmas card that has huge pits to jump across and flying turtles who have an insatiable appetite for plumbers from Brooklyn, New York.




I'm sure that most everyone has heard of the video game "Super Mario Brothers 3" for the Nintendo Entertainment System.  Originally released in Japan in 1988, the game hit store shelves in the United States and Canada in early 1990, and quickly became a best-selling video game.  For years, it held the record of being the best-selling video game of all-time.

And it was a game that I had gotten for Christmas when I was ten years old, making the year 1991.  Of course, it wasn't as if I hadn't played the video game before prior to owning it.  I did rent it at least once a month from the local corner store!

But what a spectacular game it was!  It was the first game to introduce the seven Koopalings (Iggy, Larry, Lemmy, Ludwig, Morton, Roy, and Wendy), it was the first game to introduce warp whistles, it was the first game to introduce a small inventory screen in which you could carry up to twenty-eight different items at once, and it was the first Mario game in which Mario gained the power of flight, as a raccoon leaf could make Mario soar to the clouds!

It was also a very challenging game at that.  I remember many instances in which I was playing Super Mario Brothers 3 and wanting to throw my controller through the screen of the television set because I could not manage to find a way to get through a level without depleting my 1-UP supply.  And, that was actually a good thing.  Nobody ever wants to play a video game that was too easy!  Easy games were boring games!


I still remember the day that I first played Super Mario 3.  I had rented it from the corner video store for a weekend, and I wanted to play it so badly.  Here's the kicker though.  Because the game was the most rented video game at that store, I had to be put on a waiting list in order to play it!  And, when I finally got the opportunity to play the video game for the first time, I couldn't even figure out how to even make the first level begin!  Unlike the first two games, in which the level automatically began when you pressed the "START" button, the third game began with a map screen.  And, believe it or not, it took half an hour for me to come to the conclusion that you needed to move Mario to the location on the map and that the game would not do it for you!

(Sigh...I shudder at how naive I was as a child.)


Anyway, once I figured it out, I ended up doing not too badly.  Sure, I got quite a few game overs on my quest to rescue Princess Toadstool from the clutches of Bowser, but that was all part of the fun.  After all, practice made perfect, right?

And certainly, Super Mario 3 was one of those games that amped up the difficulty.  After all, it did have eight distinct worlds, each one with its own distinct theme.  Some worlds were quite easy to navigate through, like Desert World or Grass World.  Some were quite mystical, but fun to get through like Giant World or Sky World.  And some really tested your patience, such as the case with Water World or Pipe World.

But of all the worlds found in Super Mario 3, I have to say that one of them really made me want to just shut off the game and not play ever again.  One world in which I used up all of my lives just to get through!

And, while most people find World 7 or World 8 to be the hardest world in the whole game, my world of frustration happened to be World 6.

And since we're keeping in theme with the Christmas spirit...which in my home country of Canada means near frigid temperatures, snow covered trees and pavement covered with black ice...why not talk about the world which gave me the most trouble in Super Mario Brothers 3?

World 6...the Ice World.  In my opinion, the hardest world in the game.  I find it even harder than World 7 and World 8!

Did you want to see a screenshot of the world that I found most frustrating?  Have a look.




And, while we're at it, let's listen to the theme music of this world.  It's a calming, but haunting melody at the same time.  The perfect soundtrack to a world that I found nearly impossible to get through!




Now, you might be wondering...what's the big deal?  Upon first glance of the screenshot, it doesn't look that intimidating.  A world with only three levels, a small castle, and a couple of Hammer Brothers guarding treasures.  Why would I absolutely despise this world more than any other one in the third Super Mario game?

Well, you see...I only showed you a small part of the ice world.  Here's the rest of it.




That's right.  With ten regular levels, three fortresses, and an airship level...not to mention at least three Hammer Brothers wandering around the world, the Ice World is the largest world in the whole game!  I swear, trying to get through the sixth world of the game was absolutely insane.  

But you know, if it were just a simple thing like having more levels than any other world, then it wouldn't be that big of a deal.  It would just take a little bit longer to get through the whole thing.  There had to be something else about the ice world that made it very challenging.




Well, how about the fact that in nearly every single level, there were ice blocks?  Slippery ice blocks?  Ice blocks that were so slippery that one false move and you'd slide completely off of a cliff?  And what was worse?  Nearly every single level was like this!  The first level of World 6 was extremely difficult unless you have a Fire Flower, because you not only had to slide around on frozen platforms, but you also had to dodge the projectile shooting plants known under the name of the "Patooie"!  Imagine trying to dodge those projectiles while trying to maintain your footing!  That's evil.  Really evil.

Even more evil was the fact that so many levels within the game were levels which had either automatic scrolling, or had so many quick jumps in rapid succession that you literally were biting your tongue trying to get through the level in one piece.  Nevermind the fact that some of these levels had wide gaps that were covered in ice which made an already difficult level even more impossible.  See worlds 6-2, 6-4, and 6-7 for examples of what I mean.  Or, basically any level that has the following soundtrack below.




(I grew to LOATHE that music after a while.)

I mean, really, the whole ice motif was probably the hardest part of the whole entire world.  For starters, one of the three fortresses was crafted entirely of ice...and all of the enemies in the ice castle were those horribly large, incredibly deadly Thwomps.  




You know, those giant rocks with faces on them that grimace as they try to make Mario flatter than a blueberry pancake served at IHOP?  Yep.  For me, the most evil enemy of the whole Super Mario 3 game cartridge.  When I first encountered them in World 2, I hated them then, and there weren't even that many in that world!  By World 6, I was completely done with them.

And, then there were those worlds in which there were coins that were trapped in blocks of ice.  And unless you had fire power that was granted to either Mario or Luigi by way of Fire Flowers, you could not grab them.  And in a world in which you were almost guaranteed to lose a life or two or twenty-five, you needed those coins.

(Because as true Mario savants know, one hundred coins equals one green 1-UP mushroom!)

Oh, one more thing.  There were enemies that were frozen in ice too...and if you warmed them up, the monsters warmed up and were able to hurt Mario and Luigi...which of course made the level even harder!

Now, I will say that some levels of World 6 were quite hard.  I wouldn't ever list one level in the ice world as being extremely easy.  I thought they were all challenging from 6-4's spinning platforms, to 6-6's underwater swimming, to 6-7's falling donut blocks.

But would you believe that there was one level in world 6 that for three years I never completed because I absolutely had no idea how to even complete it?  And, as someone who likes to try and complete every level in a Mario game, it bothered me that I couldn't complete it.




That level was World 6-5.

Apparently, it took me years to figure it out, but there was only one way out of World 6-5.  What you had to do was become Raccoon Mario, find the one and only Koopa Troopa (the turtle) in the level, stomp on it once, and fly up towards the ceiling with the shell and use it to smash the blocks that were obstructing the one and only exit in the area.  Going through any other exit would cause you to replay the level over and over again until you ran out of time.

It took me three years to figure out that trick.  Prior to that, I would have to use two Jugem's Clouds from my inventory, and use them to bypass 6-5, grab the Hammer Brothers suit from the Toad House that 6-5 was blocking, and use another cloud to bypass world 6-5 again!  It was very awkward for sure!


But I suppose that was where World 6 could be easy.  You didn't have to complete every one of the ten levels.  There were three instances in which you could choose whatever level you wanted to complete, and you could still make your way through the level.  You could probably get through a path that only used as few as six levels.  The only compulsory levels that you needed to get through were 6-1, 6-4, and 6-8...as well as the three fortresses.  All the others were ones that you could pick from.  You could complete 6-6 without having to do 6-5, or you could do 6-10 without having to do 6-9, and so on, and so forth.

But one final insult to injury in regards to World 6 is the airship level.  For the first seven worlds, Mario and Luigi have to collect a magic wand that one of Bowser's Koopalings had stolen from the ruler of each land, and you have to grab the wand and use it to change the king back to his human form (all the Koopalings changed the ruler of each land into an animal).  And, the boss of World 6 was my least favourite Koopaling, Lemmy Koopa.




Lemmy's weapon of choice was giant bouncy balls, and he basically threw them in all different directions, making it nearly impossible to get a direct hit on him.  I cursed the day I ever fought Lemmy Koopa because he was freakin' hard to defeat.  Not as hard as Bowser, mind you, but extremely hard enough!

But you know, practice made perfect...and after losing a grand total of seventy-six lives on my first playthrough of World 6, I survived the cold chill of the world...and while most people I know list World 7 as their least favourite world, I found it much easier than World 6!

And, that wraps up today's Saturday Smorgasbord as well as Day #14 of the blog!

Now, coming up tomorrow on Day #15...we take a listen to a Christmas favourite by a singer whose Christmas album got people "all shook up".