Search This Blog

Thursday, October 08, 2015

Stop The Body Shaming, People! Sheesh!!!

October 8, 2015

Until just recently, I was having a hard time trying to come up with a concept to talk about in this blog.  I know that I don't write in this space as much as I used to, but I still want to try and write at least three or four entries a week so that it doesn't look like I have completely abandoned it.

But this is one time in which I was inspired to write about something after it showed up in my news feed on one of my social media accounts.  And I warn you ahead of time...it's not going to be pretty.

You know how on Facebook, they have this feature where they display the Top 10 Trending News Stories that are happening at that moment?  Well, sometimes they talk about some serious issues like the upcoming Canadian elections on October 19 (please vote, everyone!) or the tragic shootings at a community college in Oregon (my thoughts are with the families of those who were killed or wounded).  Most of the time though, it's mindless fluff and stuff that we don't care about.

(Seriously, one week I checked my news feed, and four of the ten news stories had to do with one of the Kardashians.  Seriously, Kardashian family...you do absolutely nothing newsworthy.  Just go away!  Yes, Caitlyn Jenner's transition from male to female was major news once upon a time, but that moment has passed.)

Sorry.  I feel compelled to rant about the Kardashians at least once per week.  I'm better now.

Anyway, one of the stories had to do with Vin Diesel.  You might know him from his work on "The Fast and the Furious" films...also known as the film franchise that absolutely refuses to die. 

So, he was on vacation somewhere, and you know how when celebrities go on vacation, there is always someone there with a camera in hand to snap a photo of them because they have no life other than to stalk those who do?

Well, a recent picture of Vin Diesel submerged online, and when you compare it to another photo taken right around the time that he was filming one of the Fast and Furious films, well...there is a bit of a difference.



The photo on the left is an older photo.  The one on the right is the new photo.  And really, the only difference that I can see is that Vin Diesel's midsection has changed a little.

Yes, Vin Diesel has what many people refer to as a "dad bod".  And you know what?  It doesn't matter to me in the slightest.  I mean, when you look at it, people who star in action films go through a lot to get to the physical shape that they are required to have to fit the right look.  They exercise six hours a day, eat protein rich meals, and basically live life like a contestant on "The Biggest Loser".  After all that training and all that work, when a movie wraps up, isn't it completely natural to relax and do whatever you want afterwards?  I mean, I'm sure that by the time "Fast and Furious 14" comes out, he'll be back to fighting shape in no time.

And another thing to consider?  Vin Diesel is 48 years old.  Last time I checked, 48 is considered middle-age.  And last time I checked, the majority of 48 year olds I know have less than perfect figures due to a slowing metabolism and aging bones and muscles.  In short, Vin Diesel is like any other normal man in the world.

So, that's why it makes me very sad to see so many ignorant people commenting negatively about the new photo.  I mean, yes, it is a bit of a jarring comparison, but so what? 

Besides, I'm noticing a bit of a double standard when it comes to body types and people commenting on said body types, and I think that's what upsets me most.

Just to throw out a fictional example, let's take a female star of the same movie series.  Let's look at Jordana Brewster.  Now, I could look at a picture of her now and say that she is one incredibly beautiful woman.  Now, I would imagine that had she gained a few extra pounds around the midsection, there would still be those jerks on social media that would make incredibly nasty comments.  However, we're in a time where people are now starting to realize that comments like that are unacceptable and that we should be standing up for plus-sized women instead of ridiculing them.

Don't get me wrong.  We still have a long way to go as a society, but when it comes to plus-sized women, I think we're becoming less jerky towards them and more accepting...which is how we should have been all along.

So here's my question?  Why is it not okay to body shame women, but it's perfectly fine to make men feel inadequate about their own bodies?

Here's fact for you.  Men can be just as insecure about our bodies as women can.  To this day, I still hate taking off my shirt in public, and whenever I have to change clothes in a change room, I always try to hide in a corner away from everyone else.  Being husky my whole life, I've never really have that much confidence looking in the mirror, or even showing myself off to other people.  And part of the reason why that was the case was because of thoughtless comments from people who publicly shamed me because I was fat.

Here's fact.  Did you know that male eating disorders are becoming more and more evident, especially in young men aged 15-24?  There is even an organization for men who have eating disorders called "NAMED", where men can seek assistance.

It's why I couldn't stand by "comedienne" Nicole Arbour for her thoughtless and cruel fat-shaming video that she seemingly has no remorse in making.  I honestly think that if we had less people like her in the world and more people who were understanding, then maybe there wouldn't be this much stigma about body types.

The fact of the matter is that most of us who are fat want to lose the weight, not necessarily for vanity issues, but for health reasons.  And frankly, people who feel the need to treat people like garbage because they happen to weigh more than they do...they might think that they are doing us a favour, but really they are just contributing to the shattered self-esteem that some of us have.

I was the person who when someone told me that I needed to lose a few pounds, I would grab a box of Twinkies and eat the whole box right in front of them to get them to leave me alone.  But that doesn't work.  It just gives them more incentive to be cruel. 

You want to know what does work?  Building people up.  Being part of a team.  Support from friends and family.  To me, being around people you love is a natural appetite suppressant.  Trust me.  It works.

So you know what, Vin Diesel?  I support you.  You go out there and you show off your body like a man.  Anyone who says anything nasty about you...well, you just ignore them.  Or brag that you are worth millions.  Either way, it'll shut them up.

Who knows?  Maybe one day, I'll find the courage to be topless in public.  I just know that today's not that day! 

Tuesday, October 06, 2015

October 6, 1991

I hope you're ready for the next edition of the Tuesday Timeline because this one is quite epic.

Well, okay, it's not really epic.  But it was a date in which the sanctity of marriage was established - or mocked.  I guess it depends on how you see it.

We'll get to what the heck I am talking about in a moment.  In the meantime, let's see what was happening in the world on this, the 6th of October.

1600 - "Eurydice", an opera written by Jacopo Peri, premieres in Florence, Italy, signifying the beginning of The Baroque Period

1769 - English general/politician Isaac Brock (d. 1812) is born

1777 - Sir Henry Clinton leads British forces in the capture of Continental Army Hudson River defenses in the Battle of Forts Clinton and Montgomery during the American Revolutionary War

1876 - The American Library Association is founded

1889 - Thomas Edison shows his first motion picture

1908 - Austria-Hungary annexes Bosnia-Herzegovina, sparking the Bosnian crisis

1927 - "The Jazz Singer" - the first motion picture that featured prominent talking - opens

1945 - In one of the weirder stories to come out of the World Series, Billy Sianis and his goat are ejected from Wrigley Field during Game 4 of the Series

1973 - The Yom Kippur War is triggered when Egypt and Syria launch a coordinated attack on Israel

1979 - Pope John Paul II becomes the first pontiff to visit the White House

1981 - Islamic extremists murder Egyptian President Anwar al-Sadat

1989 - Actress Bette Davis passes away, aged 81

2000 - A pair of Presidents resign; Yugoslavia's Slobodan Milosevic and Argentina's Carlos Alvarez - the same day, actor Richard Farnsworth passes away, aged 80

2007 - Jason Lewis completes the first human-powered circumnavigation of the world

2014 - Actress/singer Marian Seldes passes away at the age of 86

And, let's have a look at what famous faces are turning one year older today!  Happy birthday wishes go out to Sandra Voe, Ellen Travolta, Britt Eklund, Michael Durrell, Leslie Moonves, David Brin, Kevin Cronin, Bill Buford, David Hidalgo, Kathleen Webb, Jsu Garcia, Elisabeth Shue, Tom Jager, Matthew Sweet, Jacqueline Obradors, Amy Jo Johnson, Shauna MacDonald, Daniel Cavanagh, Jeff B. Davis, Rebecca Lobo, Jeremy Sisto, Melinda Doolittle, Wes Ramsey, Michael Arden, Bronagh Waugh, Joanna Pacitti, Meg Myers, Olivia Thirlby, and Roshon Fegan.

All right.  Time to jump into my time machine and see where we'll end up.



Ah, October 6, 1991.  Looks like a great spot to dive in.

Now, I might be mistaken in this, but I think this is the first time I've ever gone back to 1991 in this Tuesday Timeline feature since I began it.  That's not to say that 1991 was a boring year in history - far from it.  It's just that until now, I haven't really chosen a moment in pop culture from that year that I could do a full blog entry on.

Until now.

You see, October 6, 1991 was a very special day in the mystical land known as Hollywood.  It was the date that a rather...unusual couple tied the knot.

You know how much press celebrity weddings generate whenever they happen, and how news outlets seem to compete against each other for the exclusive first pictures of a newly married couple?  I have to wonder just how much money was spent on trying to get the first snapshot of Jennifer Aniston and Justin Theroux on their big day.  These days, it seems as though if TMZ isn't trying to crash your wedding, then it's not noteworthy enough for people to care about.

Of course, long before Harvey Levin and his crew created TMZ - like 1991 - we had to find out about our favourite celebrity weddings the old fashioned way.  We had The National Enquirer, Star Magazine, and Globe Magazine to tell us half-truths about how couples met, got engaged, and all of the wedding details.  We had paparazzi hiding in bushes or perched up on rooftops, trying to spy on the "I Do"'s.  It was quite elaborate how newsmakers did everything possible to try and get the story.



And the big story and wedding of October 6, 1991?  The marriage of Elizabeth Taylor and Larry Fortensky, that's what.

And, in both cases, the marriage was not their first.  It was Fortensky's third trip down the aisle.  For Taylor, it was her eighth!

Certainly the union was talked about for a number of reasons.  Many believed that the marriage was one of convenience, as Taylor was feeling lonely, and Fortensky saw her as nothing more than a sugar mama.  But the relationship between Taylor and Fortensky was a very complex one.

The story begins in 1988.  At the time, Larry Fortensky was a thirty-six year old construction worker who had checked into the Betty Ford clinic for alcohol addiction.  Fortensky, the oldest of seven children, had battled the demons of alcohol for years, and had been married and divorced twice.  The year before he checked into rehab, he had been arrested for driving under the influence and had marijuana in his possession.  He used medical insurance provided by his job to check into the rehab center where he first met the woman who would become his third wife.

Now, Elizabeth Taylor at the time that she met him was sixty-six - a full twenty years older than the man that would become her husband.  At the time, Taylor was also a patient at the clinic, spending seven weeks there treating an addiction to painkillers.  But something about Fortensky made Taylor feel very close to him, and they began dating at some point after both had left rehab.

Now, Taylor was no stranger to love.  She had been married seven times previously.  Just as a refresher, here were her previous seven marriages.

1.  Conrad Hilton (1950-1951) - DIVORCED
2.  Michael Wilding (1952-1957) - DIVORCED, 2 CHILDREN
3.  Mike Todd (1957-1958) - WIDOWED, 1 CHILD
4.  Eddie Fisher (1959-1964) - DIVORCED
5.  Richard Burton (1964-1974) - DIVORCED
6.  Richard Burton (1975-1976) - DIVORCED AGAIN
7.  John Warner (1976-1982) - DIVORCED

Not exactly the best track record, huh?  But what was interesting about these marriages was that in all of them, the men were older - in the case of Wilding and Todd, the men were at least two decades older than Taylor.  But Fortensky was two decades YOUNGER, leading many to brand him a gold-digger. 



But despite the naysayers, Taylor and Fortensky made their marriage official on October 6, 1991 - and the wedding took place at Michael Jackson's Neverland Ranch.  It was only fitting, given that Jackson and Taylor had been friends for years.  And Jackson wasn't the only celebrity guest in attendance.  The list of guests included Eddie Murphy, Liza Minnelli, Macaulay Culkin, George Hamilton, Merv Griffin, Nancy Reagan, Franco Zeffirelli, Arsenio Hall, Pia Zadora, and Quincy Jones. 

Just to name a few, of course.

The actual wedding cost somewhere in the figure of two million dollars, so you know that it had to be extremely elaborate.  Taylor's wedding dress was designed by Valentino and was worth $25,000.  And to appease the paparazzi, the couple did sell their wedding photos to the highest bidders - provided that the money raised for the sale of the photos were donated to charities that helped raise awareness and research for the AIDS virus, a cause that was near and dear to Taylor's heart.

Unfortunately, the marriage of Taylor and Fortensky did not last that long.  Sure, both of them tried to make it work, but by 1996, the couple had decided to file for divorce.  Now, some people were suspicious of the timing of the divorce, as it was alleged that Fortensky had a pre-nuptial agreement with Taylor stating that he would receive one million dollars if he and Taylor's marriage lasted five years before filing for divorce.  But Fortensky later claimed that the reason why the divorce happened was because he felt as though he was living under his wife's shadow.  Between a career resurrection in film roles, as well as promoting her "White Diamonds" perfume, it's a wonder the couple got to spend much time together at all.

But here is one interesting footnote regarding the union between Taylor and Fortensky.  Although no longer married, the couple still remained friends, and Taylor and Fortensky reportedly continued to talk to each other at least once a month following the divorce via phone.  She was even there for him following a near fatal fall that he suffered in 1999, and reportedly helped him with paying the bills necessary to keep his home.

And following Elizabeth Taylor's death in March 2011 at the age of 79, Taylor had reportedly left Fortensky $800,000 in her will. 

Now, as of October 2015, it's not known what Fortensky is up to, but since his 1999 accident, he has been left unable to work due to his injuries, and he has reportedly been estranged from several family members who reportedly sold information to tabloids without his permission.

But for five years, Larry Fortensky was the husband of one of the most legendary and glamourous stars of Hollywood.  And, regardless of what you might believe, I honestly think that there had to be some love and affection between the two of them - even if it was hard to understand at times.

Monday, October 05, 2015

Artist Spotlight: Glenn Medeiros

Hello, everybody!  Well, today I'm going to do something a little bit different.  I'm going to do a Sunday Jukebox entry on a Monday, so consider this a Monday Jukebox entry instead.

Let's just say that my work schedule has been ridiculous lately and I ended up being too exhausted to even write one character in a blog yesterday.  But that's okay because I have a topic that I am really interested in talking about because today's subject is a person who could be considered a two-hit wonder.

And one of those hits I don't really care for.  At all.

Yeah, I know.  What I said seems like the biggest contradiction ever.  How can I be so excited over something that I hate?



Well, it could be because his other hit was a song that I actually don't mind.  And it could be because his story after leaving the music business is quite an interesting one.  I think that's why I'm happy to make the choice I made in making Glenn Medeiros the artist spotlight for this week.

But just who is Glenn Medeiros?

Well, I can tell you a few things about him.  He was born in Honolulu, Hawaii on June 24, 1970, which would make him 45 years old today.  When he was ten years old, he developed a love for singing by entertaining tourists on his father's tour bus, and when he was sixteen years old, he entered a contest that was being run by a local radio station where he sang a cover of a George Benson song.  Little did he know that song would be recorded as an album by an independent record label and listened to by record executive Guy Zapoleon.  Zapoleon took the copy of Medeiros' song to KZZP radio where it began playing in radio stations across the state of Arizona. 

Soon after, the song became a hit nationally.  Then worldwide.  And before anyone knew it, the 16-year-old kid from Hawaii who entered a talent competition was the next big thing in pop music.

It's just too bad that it happens to be a song that I don't particularly like.

Now, don't get me wrong.  I have nothing against the vocal abilities of Glenn Medeiros.  He sang a lot better at 16 than I did.  Truth be told, if it were any other song that he sang, I would probably like it.

But when you take a song that is dripping with enough sugar to put somebody in a diabetic coma and couple that with the quintessential 1980s schmaltz fest that was a video set on the beach (see Debbie Gibson's "Only In My Dreams" or Rick Astley's "Whenever You Need Somebody" for further evidence), well...you have this.



ARTIST:  Glenn Medeiros
SONG:  Nothing's Gonna Change My Love For You
ALBUM:  Glenn Medeiros
DATE RELEASED:  March 1987
PEAK POSITION ON THE BILLBOARD CHARTS:  #12



Oh, my god, even the single cover is enough to give you 1980s induced nightmares.  Again, that's no reflection on Medeiros, just a reflection against the cover artist who put together this album cover.  It just looks like a bad postcard with "Wish You Were Here Instead Of Me" for the text. 

And talk about cheesy music videos!  Okay, so back in 1987, it may have been the most romantic thing that you've ever seen.  But looking back on it now, it's a perfect illustration of everything that was wrong with the 1980s.

(Which wasn't much, mind you...but still.)

Whenever this song came on the radio - which was surprisingly frequent on the Top 40 station I listened to in my youth - I would always cringe because to me, "Nothing's Gonna Change My Love For You" evokes the same feelings of annoyance that the Backstreet Boys did twelve years later with the song "I Want It That Way", which, let's face it was the same twenty-two words that were repeated ad nauseum.

The Backstreet Boys had much better songs than that one.  And listening to the rest of Glenn's discography, I have to say that he had a lot better singles.  I mean, I get that if it wasn't for "Nothing's Gonna Change My Love For You", Medeiros would have never been discovered...but couldn't he have done a cover of a Michael Jackson song instead?  Or Cyndi Lauper?  Heck, I would have even taken a song by ABBA!

At least his second hit did much better, both in terms of listening and chart performance.



ARTIST:  Glenn Medeiros
SONG:  She Ain't Worth It
ALBUM:  Glenn Medeiros
DATE RELEASED:  May 5, 1990
PEAK POSITION ON THE BILLBOARD CHARTS:  #1 for 1 week



NOTE:  Glenn actually released two self-titled albums.  One in 1987 and one in 1990.  I don't want you to think that it took three years for two songs from the same album to chart!

Now, I don't know whether it's my tendency to like new jack swing type music.  I don't know if Bobby Brown doing a rap solo in the song was the reason why.  All I know is that I actually don't mind this one.  It was one of those songs that I liked a lot, but didn't understand why.  Especially since the song was released by a man whose first big single made me cringe every single time I hear it.

I guess it all comes down to personal preferences and personal opinion.  I know that when it comes to different artists, depending on the type of music they release, I'll either love it or hate it.  A perfect example of this is Taylor Swift.  I'm not a country fan by any means, and a lot of her earlier hits like "Teardrops On My Guitar" and "Tim McGraw" are too twangy for me.

But then you take her pop album "1989" and a lot of the songs from there are songs that I really enjoy.

Well, the same holds true for Glenn Medeiros.  As a romantic crooner and ballad singer, he doesn't really garner my interest much.  But give him a faster beat and a song that has catchy lyrics, and I tend to like him more.

Or, maybe I just tend to like songs in which couples break up instead of make up.  That wouldn't make me a sadist, would it?  Then again, love is one of the few things that I am cynical about in general.

Anyway, Glenn Medeiros had a couple of single releases here and there, but by the mid-1990s, he decided to change his focus slightly.  I hope it didn't have anything to do with the disasterous appearance on the UK show Jukebox Jury in 1990...

Anyway, Glenn still kept his musical roots in place, and he wrote almost 200 songs for various artists around the world.  But instead of performing music in hopes of having another hit single, he decided that he would teach music instead.

And since the mid-1990s, he has pursued a career in education.



He taught hundreds of elementary and middle school aged children in Oahu, Hawaii before becoming Vice Principal of Maryknoll Grade School.  And in April 2015, Medeiros was appointed the President of St. Louis School - a position he began on July 1.

I would say that he's done very well for himself, wouldn't you?

So, maybe his singing career didn't last as long as he would have liked.  But with his passion for music, and making sure that it held a place in school curriculum - well, I have to respect him for that.  I know how important arts programs are to schools, and anyone who supports the implementation of music, art, and drama into public school programs automatically has my seal of approval.

But nothing's gonna change my hate of "Nothing's Gonna Change My Love Fore You".  Sorry, Glenn.

Friday, October 02, 2015

New Archies Reviewed - Episode 6A: Hamburger Helpers

So, before I begin with the the discussion of Episode 6A: Hamburger Helpers for the New Archies Reviewed portion of the blog, I do want to inform you that the episode source that I grabbed the screenshots from is incomplete.

Don't get me wrong, I got enough screenshots to do a full recap.  But for some reason, the first minute of the episode was left off of this episode.  And I know this for a fact because I happen to have an old VHS copy of the same episode, and there was one extra scene at the beginning of the episode. 

So, I'm going to describe the scene and type out the dialogue, and show you a piece of an animation cel that obviously came from that episode.  Believe me, the episode is one of the better ones.  I would remember it for sure.



I do have the title screen, at least. 

So after the title screen, we see the exterior of Riverdale Junior High and we hear Miss Grundy doing a lecture on the four food groups.  While all this is going on, Mr. Weatherbee is outside scarfing down an ice cream cone.  But, hey, ice cream is a part of the dairy group, so good job, Mr. Weatherbee!

One person who isn't doing a good job is Miss Grundy.  As soon as she pulls down a chart showing the food groups, the chart zips back up into the board, which causes hysterical laughter by all, and Miss Grundy to mumble with an annoyed grunt.  After she composes herself, she asks her class to name something that comes from the four food groups.  Betty says broccoli, which earns her an A+.  Veronica says caviar, which Miss Grundy accepts with a "yeah, sure", which tells me that even Miss Grundy wants to smack her in the face once in a while.

When it comes to Jughead's turn, Miss Grundy doesn't even let him finish.  She and the whole class know that Jughead is going to say hamburgers.  After all, they are his favourite food.  But Jughead tries to justify his stance by talking about how hamburgers are the perfect food, and it is here where the animation cel comes into play.



See as Jughead is telling Miss Grundy about how the hamburger has all four food groups, a dream sequence is playing where hamburgers pretend they are contestants in the Miss America pageant and how they are modelling cheese, lettuce, and tomatoes.  Good thing none of them are wearing stethoscopes or else Joy Behar would mock them.  But Jughead is instead the one mocked because Miss Grundy says that one day he will turn into a hamburger which causes Reggie to remark that it would be an improvement because Reggie is the male version of a salty bitch, don't you know?



Now we get to where my episode source begins with Betty and Veronica telling Jughead that he can't eat hamburgers his whole life.  Clearly this has no effect on Jughead, because once he reaches high school, his burger addiction becomes even more apparent.  But the conversation is interrupted when Archie arrives on the scene with a brand new skateboard apparently took him three months to build.  Wow, given Archie's track record with fixing things in the comic books, I'm amazed that Archie still has his fingers, let alone built a skateboard with his bare hands. 

And certainly Jughead, Betty, and Veronica are equally impressed that for once Archie built something that didn't require calling 911. 



Reggie, on the other hand, is jealous that Archie is getting all of the attention, and naturally he tries to upstage Archie by doing fancy tricks on his own board...

...only for the rest of the gang to completely ignore him by running into Pop Tate's.  HA! 



At the gang's booth, we see that apparently Riverdale Junior High doesn't bother to feed the students, so they are ordering enormous portions of food to eat at Pop's.  Betty and Veronica are having enough salad to feed four people.  Archie and Reggie appear to be eating some kind of sandwich.  And there's Jughead with so many burgers on his plate that you'd swear that Pop Tate had a cattle ranch out back.



Betty once again tries to convince Jughead that there are so many other foods to eat like the bowl of salad that is in front of her, but Jughead uses one of his hamburgers to speak for him, telling her to shove lettuce down her judgmental throat to leave him alone and that if he wanted to, he could give up hamburgers today.  Veronica jumps on that statement and is convinced that Jughead won't be able to do it.



She sweetens the deal by making a less than friendly wager with our Hamburger Gourmet.  If Jughead can stop eating hamburgers for one whole week, she will buy him all the hamburgers he can eat for twenty-four hours.

Reggie interrupts by saying that there is no way that Jughead will make it that long without being tempted by the fruit of a burger, but Archie and Betty defend Jughead by saying that they believe in him.  In fact, Archie believes in Jughead so much that he bets his new skateboard against Reggie in a separate bet!



Uh-oh.  Veronica bet Jughead that he couldn't eat a hamburger for seven days.  And Reggie bet Archie that Jughead wouldn't last the whole week.  I get the feeling that Jughead is going to have a hard time with this one.

After all, he has posters of hamburgers on his bedroom walls instead of Debbie Gibson and Tiffany.



And he does sleep in a hamburger bed that has hamburger pillows...which obviously must be custom made, which leads me to wonder how the hell Jughead's parents were able to afford it.  Of course, this was before Jellybean was born, so maybe that explains it.



Oh, and the best part is when he starts hallucinating in school and ends up trying to steal Amani's lunch thinking that there's a nice juicy cheeseburger inside.  Instead there's an apple, a sandwich, and what is presumably a cup of strawberry flavoured yogurt.  In short, your typical boring middle school lunch.



As Betty and Archie watch Jughead doing a punishment for disrupting the class, they get to talking about how difficult it has been for Jughead to continue with the bet, and they make a pact to keep a close eye on Jughead so that he won't lose.  Part of me wonders if Archie is only doing this to make sure that Reggie doesn't get his skateboard, but I'm just going to assume that Archie and Betty are good people and they truly want to help Jughead.



Unlike Reggie and Veronica who are now coming to the sad realization that if Jughead wins the bet, they will have to take out a line of credit to pay for the "all you can eat hamburger" promise they made to Jughead.  You see, Jughead's stomach is deeper than the Grand Canyon, and many people speculated that Jughead was a major pot head and that's why he was always hungry.  I definitely wasn't one of the ones who suggested this, but I guess in some bizarro world, it would make sense.

So, Reggie and Veronica do the only thing they know how to do.  Manipulate the contest so that Jughead will lose on purpose.  Because they're liars, cheaters, and thieves like that.



To Jughead's credit though, he does very well.  By Day #4 he has been slowly, but surely staying away from the hamburgers.  Despite Reggie trying to hide in garbage cans and placing burgers in his path, to Reggie climbing up on Jughead's roof to drop hamburgers through his window, Betty and Archie are doing everything possible to try and get Jughead away from the temptation.



By Day #6, Jughead is about ready to break, and Reggie - dressed up as a bush (seriously, is Reggie channeling Brain from Inspector Gadget) follows Jughead to Pop Tate's, where Jughead is sadly staring through the window at the hamburgers frying on the grill.

Reggie decides to try playing nice to Jughead, even though Reggie being nice is the same as Kim Davis giving marriage licenses to same-sex couples, and Reggie invites Jughead into Pop's for some lunch.



Ah, but Reggie's got an ulterior motive.  See, Jughead can't have hamburgers at all.  So, why not take Jughead into a hamburger restaurant and have him eat a delicious dollop of cottage cheese while Reggie sits down and has the biggest hamburger right in front of him.  I tell you, that's the equivalent of dragging an alcoholic to the liquor store.  Reggie, this is probably the worst thing you have ever done, and honestly if I were Jughead, I'd probably punch you right in the mouth.

Reggie decides to put the ultimate test into action.  After Reggie gets his burger, and leaves a crying Jughead alone, Jughead is tempted by the delicious treat.  In fact, he's so tempted that he imagines that the french fries on Reggie's plate are dancing next to the burger.  He reaches over and grabs the burger...

...but luckily, Eugene (who was playing video games in the store) manages to grab Betty's attention, and the two of them stop Jughead in time, leaving Reggie with ketchup on his face.



No, I'm serious.  Betty throws the burger in Reggie's face, literally leaving him with ketchup on his face.  Couldn't have happened to a lousier person.



You want to know who else is a lousy person?  Veronica.  And after Reggie reports back that he has screwed up yet again, Veronica decides to play dirty.  She calls up Jughead and congratulates him on being so close to winning the bet.  She invites him to come down to Lodge Mansion around three-thirty where they will take a limo to Pop's.  She's being unusually nice.



Meanwhile, Archie and Betty are distracted by Veronica yelling for help.  Wait a minute.  How can she be yelling for help and calling Jughead at the same time?



Ah, yes.  A tape recorder.  That sneaky Veronica.  Knowing full well that the bet that Jughead and Veronica made took place at four o'clock, Veronica distracted Archie and Betty while she and Reggie convince Jughead to go to the mansion where they hope to feed him full of burgers so he'll lose the bet.



Like I said.  Reggie and Veronica are evil.



Fortunately, Archie and Betty grab Moose, Eugene, and Amani to help bust inside Lodge Mansion so they can save Jughead before he can eat one morsel of food.  We also learn that Reggie planned ahead and this is the first we see of Reggie's dog, Lance.  Lance is a dalmatian with just as much attitude as his master, and Lance immediately causes a ruckus by barking loudly.



But did you know that Archie's dog, Red, is a part-time bullfighter?  While Red distracts Lance, the others make their way to the front door which is locked.  But Moose comes up with the idea to break the door down...



...just as Smithers arrives to see what the ruckus is.  Needless to say, we soon discover why Moose is the star player of the football team.

And as the clock strikes four, Veronica is initially obnoxious with everyone and brags about how she and Reggie locked Jughead in a room filled with hamburgers, and how they have won the bet, and...



...Jughead comes out with a full plate of burgers!  His will power came through!  Everyone cheers and congratulates Jughead while Reggie and Veronica are preparing to say bye bye to their whole fortune.



Later at Pop's, Jughead, in between burgers #1,289 and #1,290, explains that once Archie bet his skateboard against Reggie, he knew he couldn't let Archie down by caving in on the bet.  See, this shows why Jughead and Archie are best friends.  They will stick by each other, unlike Veronica who calls Reggie a dunderhead.  Wow, let him have it, Veronica!

We really don't know how many burgers Jughead has eaten, but Veronica remarks that she has already spent three months allowance on him!  Yeah, I don't think that she'll be making any bets any time soon.



And we close off with Veronica dragging Reggie out of Pop's so he can hock his skateboard to pay for Jughead's unstoppable appetite.

You know, I really love this episode a lot, and it's easily in my Top 5 list.  It's a story of true friendship and loyalty on the part of Archie and Jughead, and it's a story in which Veronica and Reggie get some much needed karma with bacon, cheese, ketchup, and pickles on it. 

Next week, what happens when Miss Grundy gets an offer she can't refuse?  Well, if you're her class, you sabotage it!

Thursday, October 01, 2015

New Month. New Attitude. New Thoughts On Love



October 1, 2015

New month.  New attitude.  New perspectives.  Kind of ironic that my thoughts would be all about newness when outside the weather is getting cooler and the trees are undressing for the winter. 

But you know, these last three months have been all about changes, and believe me when I say that I've made quite a lot of them.  I'm living in a new place that I absolutely love.  I've developed a whole new love for writing now that I don't do it as often, and I'm finding that now that I don't have to keep to a schedule, it's much easier to come up with more ideas.

I'm also finding it a good idea to mingle and socialize with brand new people as well.  Let's face it, I've made some mistakes in trusting people over the years and I've learned a lot from those experiences.  From now on, I only want to surround myself with people who are positive, happy, and genuinely want to be around me.

Trust me.  I want this more than ever.  I just fled a place in which everyone was completely miserable.  Never again will I subject myself to that.  Those people can live in misery together as far as I'm concerned.  They aren't worth my time any more.

In fact, I send to them one final message via a song.  Warning:  the song does contain a certain 4-letter word, so parents take caution.



Ah.  That's better.  Let's continue on.

Anyway, there's a lot of things that I've been thinking about in regards to changes and life and all that jazz.  And one of the things that has changed is my stance on quite a few personal things.

One of those things just happens to be love.

And, yes, I know.  This is kind of bad timing to be writing a post about love when Valentine's Day is not until February.  But the way I see it, I have three reasons why I want to talk about it now.  One, it's in my mind at the moment and I want to get it out.  Two, I personally believe that Valentine's Day is an excuse to buy your significant other candy so they can dump you for making them fat.  And three, I find Halloween surprisingly romantic.  Look at Gomez and Morticia Addams!  They have one of the strongest sitcom marriages ever!

When I was younger - like say, seven or eight years old - I didn't really understand the concept of love or marriage all that much.  I knew that my parents were married, and I knew that they loved each other back then as they do now.  But I didn't really know what it felt like to be married, and I didn't understand why people had weddings.  To me, a wedding was just an excuse to sit in a church for ninety minutes, dance the Funky Chicken on a badly lit dance floor, and eat cake. 

(At least, that's what it seemed like to me for any wedding that I attended prior to 1993 anyway.)

It wasn't really until I got older that I realized what being married really meant.  Two people becoming one couple because they were truly in love with each other at that particular moment in time.

Of course, with one in two marriages ending in divorce these days, I sometimes get a little bit cynical over the concept of love these days.  Sometimes I don't know if people have fallen in love, fallen in love with being in love, or have fallen in lust.

In my years on this earth, I have seen some very functional couples and marriages.  On the flipside, I've seen some incredibly dysfunctional unions that probably should have ended before they began.

Sadly, I think it's the negative marriages that have really coloured my view of love in a negative light. 

Once upon a time, there was a time in which I believed in love at first sight.  Now, I don't know if such a concept even exists.  My thoughts are that you should get to know a person inside and out before you fall in love with them.  Otherwise, it seems more like you want to fall in love with the thought of being in love even though you may be mistaking love for lust.

Did that make sense, or have I completely and totally confused the hell out of all of you?

I guess what I'm trying to say is that we've all seen those ads from eHarmony where they can find the right match for you and how you'll instantly fall in love.  Well, I don't believe in instant love connections.  If you're in love with someone, it takes time to nurture the relationship, and get to know the person.

I guess that's a part of the reason why I have remained single for so long.  I don't feel as though I have the commitment (and let's face it, self-confidence) to pursue a relationship.  And, you know, I'm fine with that for now.

I could change my mind later on...but I'm no longer seeing being unable to find a mate as being a bad thing.  One day, I might be ready.  Today isn't that day.

Tuesday, September 29, 2015

September 29, 1982

Welcome to the last Tuesday Timeline for September 2015.  And, I only wish that I had a happier topic to talk about in this edition, but I'm afraid that this one is a rather scary tale.  It certainly made one think twice about reaching into a medicine cabinet, that's for sure.

Ah, but I've said too much.  I'll get into more detail about what I mean after we get through the other necessary steps, such as historical events and September 29 birthdays.

I'm curious to know what sort of events were going on in the world this day in history.  Let's find out!

1717 - Antigua Guatemala is struck by an earthquake, destroying most of the buildings there

1789 - The United States Department of War establishes its first regular army

1829 - The Metropolitan Police of London is founded

1864 - The Battle of Chaffin's Farm is fought during the American Civil War

1885 - The first practical public electric tramway is opened in Blackpool, England

1904 - Actress Greer Garson (d. 1996) is born in the United Kingdom

1907 - Country singer Gene Autry (d. 1998) is born in Tioga, Texas

1911 - Italy declares war on the Ottoman Empire

1923 - Author and Berenstain Bears creator Stan Berenstain (d. 2005) is born in West Philadelphia, Pennsylvania

1942 - Actress Madeline Kahn (d. 1999) is born in Boston, Massachusetts

1951 - NBC broadcasts a college football game between the University of Pittsburgh and Duke - the first sporting event to be seen coast-to-coast on live television

1962 - The first Canadian satellite - Alouette 1 - is launched

1966 - The Chevrolet Camaro is first introduced

1975 - The television station WGPR Detroit becomes the first to be black-owned-and-operated

1979 - Pope John Paul II visits Ireland - the first Pope to ever do so

1988 - Addams Family creator Charles Addams passes away at the age of 76

2004 - Asteroid 4179 Toutatis passes within four lunar distances of Earth

2007 - Lois Maxwell - the original Miss Moneypenny in the Bond franchise - passes away at the age of 80

2008 - The Dow Jones loses almost 778 points due to the bankruptcies of Washington Mutual and Lehman Brothers - the largest single-day point loss in its history

And for celebrity birthdays, we have the following famous faces turning one year older today; James Cronin, Jerry Lee Lewis, Ian McShane, Mike Post, Patricia Hodge, Martin Ferrero, Mark Farner, Bryant Gumbel, Gabor Csupo, Drake Hogestyn, Mark Mitchell, Mari Wilson, Andrew Dice Clay, Stephanie Miller, Roger Bart, Jill Whelan, Erika Eleniak, DeVante Swing, Emily LloydRussell PetersNatasha Gregson Wagner, Brian Ash, Alexis Cruz, Debelah Morgan, Zachary Levi, Lisa Gormley, Lisa Foiles, David Del Rio, and Doug Brochu.

Now that we have that out of the way, it's time to reveal today's date.




September 29, 1982.  I'd like to say that I remember that date vividly, but I can't recall it.  I was only a little over a year old at that time and my biggest decisions back then was deciding on whether I wanted to have a nap or play with blocks.

But this date is one that is etched in the minds of people who lived in the Chicago area at that time.  It was on this date thirty-three years ago that had people living in fear.  It was a time in which people were not sure if the medicine that they had in their homes was safe to take.

The story begins in Elk Grove Village, Illinois.  That morning, a twelve-year-old girl died under mysterious circumstances.  It was discovered that before she passed away, she had not been feeling well and she took some Extra Strength Tylenol in hopes that it would make her feel better.  At first it was considered an isolated incident.  But as the days passed, police would soon discover that this definitely was not the case.

Later on that day, a man was brought to the hospital and died there.  He too had taken a capsule of Extra Strength Tylenol prior to his death.  The man's brother and sister-in-law would be the next to die after they had taken Tylenol from the same bottle after his memorial service.

By the end of the week, a total of seven people would lose their lives...and all seven people had one thing in common.  They had all taken Tylenol before they passed away.



And even more disturbing?  All of the bottles of Tylenol that the victims had in their possession had traces of cyanide inside of them.

This meant that someone in the Chicago area was poisoning bottles of Tylenol at random, and that a potential serial killer was on the loose.

Police investigations immediately ruled out Tylenol as the perpetrator.  All the bottles that had been poisoned came from different factories that were located all over the United States.  It made it very unlikely that the poisoned Tylenol came from the same shipment.  Therefore, police concluded that the perpetrator was instead going inside of random supermarkets and pharmacies and poisoning random bottles that way.



Either way, police urged people to cease using Tylenol until the investigation was concluded, and stores willingly took all Tylenol products off of the shelves until the killer was caught.  It was definitely a very scary time for the people in Chicago, and I can only imagine the panic and terror that was going on at that time.  Despite this though, police only managed to find eight bottles that were tampered with.  The five bottles used in the killings, as well as three others that had been found sitting on store shelves.

For what it was worth, the manufacturers of Tylenol - Johnson & Johnson - were extremely co-operative with the investigation, and despite what had happened, Tylenol rebounded within a year.  Of course, when Tylenol was reintroduced into Chicago stores, Johnson & Johnson made a few changes.  First, they changed the format of their pain relievers, choosing to make them caplets instead of capsules.  That way, it made it harder for people to tamper with.  As well, the packaging was later revamped so that all bottles were triple sealed.  This would eventually lead to the creation of childproof bottles that would make it harder to tamper with.

But perhaps the most positive change of all?  After the Tylenol murders, the law was changed so that anybody who was caught tampering with any medication of any kind would face still penalties ranging from hefty fines to jail time.  Considering the pain that this person brought so many people and the fear that they brought forth through Chicago, this was definitely a requirement.

Now, here's the scariest footnote in all of this.  As of today, the case essentially remains unsolved thirty-three years later.  The only arrest that was made in relation to the crime was in 1982, when James William Lewis was arrested for extortion and served thirteen years in prison when he sent a letter to Johnson & Johnson from New York City demanding that they send him one million dollars or else more people would be hurt.  Many people still believe that Lewis was the sole perpetrator of the Chicago Tylenol Murders, but not enough evidence has ever been presented to make any accusations stick.  Several other people were briefly considered as suspects, but they were eventually cleared.

There was even a theory going around that a former Johnson & Johnson employee had made the claim that the bottles of Tylenol were actually poisoned before the product actually reached stores, indicating that a disgruntled employee might have done the deed.

At this point in time, it's hard to say.  It has been thirty-three years since the first victim died, and in all likelihood, the person who committed the crime has since passed on as well.  Regardless, September 29, 1982 was a day that had many Chicago residents on edge, and made you think twice before reaching for headache medicine for quite some time after.