No, for today, I thought I would take a trip through the archives to see if there was anything that I wrote long before this blog existed that might garner some interest. Turns out, I found an entry from three and a half years ago that upon reading it again was worth reposting.
Fair warning...this entry is from May 19, 2011 - five days before this blog began. And the references might seem very dated. But my opinions remain the same. Hope you enjoy!
I'm wondering if anyone really believes in the idea of marriage
these days. Lately in the news, it seems that more and more marriages are
busting up amidst dozens of accusations of mishandling finances, irreconcilable
differences, and adultery, adultery, adultery!
The recent scandal surrounding actor and former governor of
California Arnold Schwarzenegger is just one of the many examples of this.
Unless you've been hiding under a rock, or don't subscribe to cable television
or newspapers, here's the story. Schwarzenegger has apparently been married to
Maria Shriver for a quarter of a century. They have had four children together.
Unfortunately, Mr. Schwarzenegger had publicly admitted to fathering a fifth
child with a woman who served as the family housekeeper for two decades. Worse
still, the housekeeper and Maria Shriver gave birth roughly one week apart to
Arnold's sons, basically confirming the fact that Arnold Schwarzenegger smashed
his wedding vows the same way one would take a baseball bat to a collection of fine
china.
Granted, Schwarzenegger is not an isolated case, especially in
the world of the richest and most famous people. Donald Trump cheated on his
wife Ivana, and ended up marrying his mistress, only for that marriage to
collapse. Jesse James practically humiliated Sandra Bullock after his
duplicitous ways were revealled. And, don't even get me started on Tiger 'she's
attacking me with a golf club' Woods.
And, it's not just below the iconic, yet terribly tacky
Hollywood sign that all this infidelity lurks. With the divorce rate for all
new marriages being approximately half, it's pretty much a given that in a few
of those break-ups, cheating was the main deal-breaker.
In case you haven't guessed, the tone I have been exhibiting
throughout this note has been a bit prickly. Of course, that's mainly because I
don't really have much of a high opinion of people who do exactly that in the
first place.
I guess I can see some circumstances where some people may feel
a need to cheat. People in abusive relationships...yeah, I could see why they
would try to find someone who would treat them better. Might not be the way
that I would go if I was in a situation like that, and I certainly wouldn't
openly advocate it, but I suppose it would be understandable.
The way Schwarzenegger went about it? Uncool. The way Jesse
James went about it? Uncool. The way Tiger Woods did...well...yeah...you get
the idea.
You know who I feel really terrible for in the Schwarzenegger
case? Naturally, you'd expect some sympathy to go towards Maria Shriver. I
mean, she found out in probably one of the most humiliating ways possible. Who
wouldn't feel for her? My opinion is that she'll come out of this just fine.
She's beautiful, intelligent, and epitomizes class in everything she does.
She'll not only bounce back from this with her head held high, but I have a
feeling that she'll be able to find happiness again very quickly.
What about the housekeeper in question? Should I feel any sort
of sympathy for her? Sadly, I have to say no. She knew full well what pot to
stir when she got involved with the Terminator and ended up popping out a
Junior of her own. But, hey...the media is having a field day with this story,
and whether she likes it or not, her face is splashed over every magazine,
webpage, and television entertainment show in the continent. I hope she enjoys
the ride of publicity, because she ain't getting off of it anytime soon.
We won't even get into how I feel about Arnold. His “Judgment
Day” is here. Bet he wishes he had an eraser to wipe the slate clean now that
his dirty knickers are all out for all to talk about.
No, the real victim in all of this is the child that he fathered
with the housekeeper. He certainly didn't ask to be born into the biggest
Hollywood scandal of 2011. He's just a kid. I wish the media would treat him as
such and not let him be scrutinized over this because he's really the one who
is going to be the most affected by this story.
All because the former Governor of California couldn't keep it
in his pants.
Oh, sure...sometimes people forgive their spouses temptations of
the forbidden fruit. Former American president William Jefferson Clinton (who
you know better as Bill) was busted for his torrid love affair with blue frock
obsessed Monica Lewinsky, and Hillary managed to stand by her man. Of course,
Clinton never withdrew from his own personal sperm bank to make a deposit in a
Lewinsky savings plan, so that may have had something to do with it.
I just wonder why people seem to treat marriage as nothing more
than a convenience these days? It almost seems like many people don't seem to
take their vows seriously in this day and age.
I understand that marriages for whatever reason can grow stale
after a while, and sometimes couples just drift apart. It's not anyone's fault
if the parties mutually agree to split. It happens. It's when one person
decides to hurt the other person by embarking on a destructive path of affairs
that the whole thing becomes a little more one-sided and a lot more shameful.
I don't know...maybe I'm just rambling here, but I guess I've
always seen marriage as the ultimate show of commitment and love for someone
else you want to be with for the rest of your life. This view might seem
old-fashioned to some people, and maybe it is. I'm far from being a man who has
a life that is incredibly traditional in nature. Heck, I'd be the first to
admit that getting married in Reno or Vegas by some middle-aged man dressed
like Wayne Newton is definitely a possible option for me should I choose to get
married at all. To me, the physical location doesn't matter. Whether it be the
Arc du Triomphe in Paris, the Plaza Hotel in New York City, or the McDonald's
restaurant on around the corner, that means nothing to
me.
Well, okay, I wouldn't choose the McDonald's as I don't want my
wedding reception to be in a place that smells of fry grease and Big Macs.
I guess what I'm trying to say is...if ever I do get married,
I'd like to hope that the only way that we'd ever break-up is if one of us
dies. Hence the popular wedding vow “til death us do part”. At the very least,
if the marriage wasn't meant to be, I'd like to think it would be because
neither of us would cheat on each other. Because, if I had a relationship
break down because I was cheated on, I would feel incredibly betrayed.
I'm sure people who have been cheated on feel the same way.
I'll just put it out there right now. If someone finds me cool
enough to want to marry me, I would NEVER break my vows.
Why? I would write my own vows. And, I always taught myself to
be absolutely truthful in everything I write. When I write these notes here, I
put everything into them. They're basically me on a pixelated web-page. When
you read anything I've ever written, they come from the heart. The mind.
Sometimes, they come from feelings of anger. Sometimes, pure happiness. But,
that's who I am.
The reason I'd want to write my own vows to someone I would want
to marry isn't to promote myself as a writer, nor is it a way to upstage the
priest conducting the ceremony. It's one way I can tell my future spouse just
how much I would be there for them through it all. It's probably one of the
best things that one can do for their partner. By writing my own vows, I can
make my own promises to the other person in my own words with what my heart is
telling me.
Maybe if other people chose to write their own vows...quite
possibly, they'd take them more seriously.
Maybe it's just me though.
MWT - 5/19/2011
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