We're
almost there everyone! Just three days
left to go until Christmas Day!
Sadly,
there are only four more days left in THE POP CULTURE
ADDICT'S ADVENT CALENDAR. Today, tomorrow, Wednesday,
and of course, Christmas Day. That kind
of makes me sad, but alas, the holidays have to end at some point, right?
Anyway,
Day #22 also happens to be FUNNY MONDAY, and for this week's
edition of the FUNNY MONDAY post, I thought I would look at funny
Christmas songs.
(This
does not mean that I will be posting funny Christmas parodies in this space
though. I only had enough for two days
worth, and if you missed them, you can find them on days eight and twelve of
the calendar this year.)
No,
what this means is that I will be posting real Christmas songs that have been
recorded by real artists that I could consider to be funny, weird, strange,
awful, terrible, horrible, or a combination of all six adjectives.
Yeah,
trust me. They're that bad. Well, at least in my opinion anyway. Some of you may actually like them. Who knows really?
Now,
just so we're clear, I will not be posting songs such as "O Holy
Night", "Silent Night", or "Away In A Manger". Those songs are Christmas classics. I also won't post songs that are beloved
parody or spoof songs such as "Bob and Doug McKenzie's Twelve Days of
Christmas", because they are so well loved.
Ah,
what the hell. Let's post that one
anyway. It will get us in the mood.
Sadly,
not all of these songs could be considered as well loved as the one above. Here are just a few examples of songs that
were recorded specifically for the Christmas season that just plain missed the
mark.
Again,
this is merely my opinion. You may
agree or disagree. In fact, I welcome
your comments and thoughts!
Okay. Those of us living in North America probably
have no idea who these girls are. But
those of you in the UK probably know them.
They are Romanian-born twins Gabriela and Monica Irimia who immigrated
to Britain in 2002. The following year,
they released this...song. Believe it
or not, the song peaked at #10 on the UK charts in December 2003!
Now,
assuming that cheeky is a synonym for fun, I can appreciate the meaning of the
title of the song. After all, Christmas
is supposed to be fun, right?
Unfortunately, they decide to take the term cheeky as being "show
your cheeks by wearing metallic gold hot pants in a winter
wonderland".
Number
one, The Cheeky Girls would develop hypothermia and become more frozen than
Olaf the Snowman. Number two, notice
how the reindeer in the video just stares at both of them while they do their
cheeky dance? I bet he's thinking
"What are these two idiots doing?
And why won't they wear clothes?"
The
bit at the end where the reindeer tries to attack the Cheeky Girls is pretty
hilarious though.
Okay,
so for those of you who aren't fluent in Spanish (I myself learned my limited
Spanish vocabulary from old "Sesame Street" episodes), Feliz Navidad
is Spanish for "Merry Christmas".
However, whenever I hear this song played on the radio, it brings forth
a homicidal rage in me that makes me want to take a Louisville slugger to the
boombox. It is almost as repetitive as
that Backstreet Boys song that repeats the phrase "you are my fire, the
one desire" over and over again.
Nothing personal against Jose Feliciano - I'm sure that he's a great guy
and all. I just wish that he would have
used more words...in both Spanish and English.
Yeah...just
listen to this one. Enough said. What is interesting is that fifty-one years
after this song was first recorded, it hit the Top 10 on the UK Song
Charts...in 2011!
Oh,
Paul McCartney...I do love most of your work.
I really do. Loved you as a
Beatle. Loved you when you sang with
Stevie Wonder and Michael Jackson.
Hell, I can even say that I liked some of the stuff you did with
Wings. But this song was not your best
work. I still get migraines from that
synthesizer!
Many
pop stars have recorded their own holiday albums with mixed results. Idina Menzel and Michael Buble = good. Britney Spears and *NSync = not great. But this song by the New Kids on the
Block? Well, I suppose it would be okay
if you were a teenager in the early 1990s.
This is one of those songs that has not aged well at all.
I
definitely hate this song in general because the whole point of the song is to
show just how materialistic and greedy people can get over the holidays. I personally would like to take the Sable
that is slipped under the tree and run over the singer with it!
But
I will say this. Despite the song's
content, Eartha Kitt did a fantastic job singing it. Madonna, not so much.
Yuck. And, what makes matters worse is that there
is a version that is done by the Irish Rovers.
My grandmother saw an Irish Rovers concert just hours before she
suddenly passed away. It would break my
heart if I knew that this was one of the last songs that she heard before she
crossed over. And she died in late
October too, so it is definitely a possibility.
Anyway,
this is where I end off my list. Do you
have any to add?
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